White people, do you know that staring is rude?

Question

You know that feeling you get when someone is watching you and when you turn around, Boom, there they are?

I can't go anywhere without experiencing this, mostly with white folks. On the bus, in restaraunts, at the mall, even on the interstate I catch 'em staring from 3 lanes over!

Staring at someone too hard can be considered rude in the black community, do white people NOT consider this rude?

I'm not doing anything illegal, I'm commuting to work, shopping with my family, or enjoying a meal.

ralph - Can I make an observation and ask a simple question without hate or a racist motive?

You should revisit some of your q and a's and think about your motives...

This is exactly my point, why do I have to be "doing something"? I am a father, husband, and tax paying citizen.
In my field of work, I wear jeans and boots, no different than what a white contractor would wear, why would I have to put on a suit to NOT look suspicious?

Answer 1

Don't listen to those morons who call you racist. I never see them on the questions blasting people of other races, so it's obvious that their opinions are not to be considered.

I've been stared at by whites before when I would go to restaurants and such where I was one of the only black people there. I don't even think they realize that they're staring. They're just so intrigued by people who look so differently than they do.

Either that or they're just straight racist.

Or they think you're hot, which is the reason my boyfriend thinks they stare.

Answer 2

Maybe they think you are attractive? Furthermore, have you ever stopped and read "White People"? Have you thought that some may think that is rude? I understand you are trying to make a point, but the Politically correct can be Caucasian. And if you are noticing people staring at you 3 lanes over, how safe is YOUR driving? LOL My point is don't be so critical of what other people do. Yeah, yeah, they are staring, so look at them in the eye and calming and politely say, "May I help you with something?"

Answer 3

Hey Mac Mac :)

your question is interesting ... and I can only answer you from my perspective.

Staring in general is rude all round .. whether it is staring at somebody else because of their race or some other reason .. BUT it can also just be a human nature thing ...

I grew up in a very anglo-little township .. very WASP-ish ( although there was a Roman Catholic representation ... ) .. It was only natural for people to *NOTICE* people who came to the town who may be different to what was considered the *norm* ... at the same time as noticing *different* people .. ( please note different does NOT necessarily mean race in this case ... one time we had a Vertically challenged{ dwarf in the old days) girl attend our school} .... I was fortunate enough to have parents who taught me that just because people DON'T look like *us* doesn't mean that they are any different in the way they think or feel .. in other words NOT to JUDGE another person for such a superficial thing ..

I *notice* really TALL people .. or people who dye their hair blue .. and for that split second I may stare .. only because I am seeing something i am not familiar with .... It is NEVER because i am placing judgement ..

JUST as say in other countries were white people are not the norm they may be stared at . We once took our THEN three year old daughter to a tourist event that recieves many Japanese Tourists .. our blue eyed- curly blonde haired daughter became the centre of attention for many of the Japanese ... but I did understand .. she was NOT what THEY were used to ..
On another vaction .. she became an item of people's photography .. ( nothing weird or kinky ... they asked my permission ) .. they said that they thought she looked like a little doll .. WHICH incidently is the same comment that many people of my parent's vintage made about little asian children

I accept though that some people stare to make a point to the person that they are staring at that THEY NOTICE THERE'S A DIFFERENCE .. but for the very wrong reasons of Judgement ...

Maybe next time you notice you are being stared at you could give the person staring at you a REALLY BIG CHEESY GRIN and a wave .. it MIGHT make them realise how insentive they are being ..
:)

My world is changing .. it's becoming a rainbow .. what wasn't the norm once .. is now becoming the Norm .. no need for stares .. just smiles :)

jen

Answer 4

Phrase your question better. You'll always get in trouble on YA if you generalise. Anyway, I'm sure they know staring is rude, but it is not always the intention. Sometimes there is just innocent curiosity. Maybe you have an interesting look/way about you. Ever considered that? Besides, if you are a parent by now you should know that this situation is sort of petty, considering how difficult day to day life can be. Don't worry about it, as far as I have seen, black and white, red and blue, every race stares just the same.

Answer 5

Paranoia runs deep......
Into your life it will creep.....
As far as being referred to as white all the time - I think I like the term Caucasian American better.
Do you watch 'white' people that much? You must to catch em looking at you so much.
People stare for a multitude of reasons, not just skin color. Maybe your choice of hairstyle, maybe they like something you are wearing, maybe, just maybe, they like the way you look.
As far as catching folks 3 lanes over on the interstate - I hope it ain't while you are driving.

Answer 6

The question should be, why are people staring at you? If you did'nt deserve this type of staring, then it's more of a negative stereotypical image. In other words, they think you're looking to cause trouble. Is it the manner of clothing that you're wearing that brings out this rude behavior more? Try wearing a suit and see if this continues to happen. If you look professional, you most likely will be treated professionally, but this is not guaranteed in today's bigoted society.

Answer 7

Maybe you're just imagining it, that's called mild social anxiety.As a person with social anxiety I can say that I often feel that like people stare, but for example my friends can confirm nobody does.
Ooor they DO actually stare and in that case, stare back in a really evil way and they will get embarrased and uncomfortable and look away;p oooor just ignore them and keep your head up, man. If you look insecure they will stare even more wondering why.

Answer 8

I get stared at and I am not black. The three-foot long hair, 6'2" of height, and light violet eyes might contribute to that. I think some of them are trying to figure out my race as well (bone structure gives it away but I am bloody pale).

I usually do not mind it. I just flash them a grin and a wink.

yomama, speak English and grow up please.

Kramden just defies any description or commentary that is not all 4 letter vernacular.

However, I do see your point. Staring is rude in any community. It is easy to say and not easy to do but... try to not let it get to you.

Answer 9

You cannot blame us for being aware of our surroundings, what with black/white interracial crime being approximately 90% black-on-white. You of all people should understand this.

We do know that staring is rude, as when a black person stares at whites before robbing them, or to get a reaction from whites so as to file a wrongful hate crime charge.

Indeed, we whites know all too well about staring.

Answer 10

I think you only notice it because it's white people, but people of all colours do rude things all the time.
And staring IS rude in ALL communities.
I hear white people complain that black people are rude when they are loud. I have to laugh...we're all humans and yet we can't see beyond the colours of our own skin!