how does a single mom with 3 kids survive in this expensive world?

Question

im only 24 with 3 kids 9, 7 and 3 years old. i have to figure out a way to support my kids by my own... i have to pay bills (rent, food, personal stuff, plus the babysitter) and i need to make time to be with mi kids... i just need some good advice on this.

Answer 1

well i don't know what kind of job you have but i am a single mom and i have 4 kids 11,7,5,and 3 and i take care of them all by myself . you are going to have to keep a budget, stop buying things that are unneccessary. i suggest you work when your kids are in school so you don't have to pay for daycare. idon't know if where you live have 3 yr old headstart but you can also put him in school. take so much money out that can take you and the kids through the week and the rest pay your bills if you don't have a bill that week when you get paid pay ahead of time or put it in the bank. as long as you keep your head up and believe in yourself you wil be able to do it.........at least you are trying unlike some other women so don't worry about the other responses

Answer 2

first you should stop having more kids,you have ur frist child when u were 15, then you keep having more where were ur parents,so that is the past but we always repeat the past ,make sure you dont do that,here some stuff you can do

1 take the father of the children too court for child support
2 try welfare until ur young one start going to school full time.while take some course to get your self ready for good job..that what the income assitance programe is there for ...
3 find a friend who have children then you can help each other with the babbysitting
4 you can offer daycare services this way you can have income and time with children...........

after all being mother is the best and hardest job in the world so dont be so hard on yourself............just make good choices for te future.......................

Answer 3

As the mother of three daughters myself, I can tell you that I thought long and hard about the dilemma before getting divorced after 18 years - even though it was a very physically and emotionally abusive marriage. I was scared to death about what would happen to me and the kids financially. I make about $18-$20 and hour, but it's not enough to make the bills for the four of us. I really depended on the child support - even though I didn't want to take it.

It always feels that I'm living paycheck to paycheck and I worry desperately about how I'm going to ever retire. I'm 41 now and my girls are 17, 14 and 12. They have a lot of expenses and I often have to tell them no. I worry about what would happen to us if I got seriously ill and couldn't work.

I think all you can do is continue moving and bettering yourself. Let your kids know that saving money is a GOOD thing and living within your means is something that everyone needs to do. Tell them what can happen if you get into debt and instill in them a sense of what money is, how to use it wisely and how to save it for a rainy day. Let them know that there are certainly things that money cannot buy. teach them to be self-reliant and to make things instead of having to buy things all of the time.

What about the father(s) of your children? They need to be made to pay child support - you NEED it to survive.

That's why they say mothering is the hardest job there is, especially by yourself. There is no easy way to do it - you just struggle day by day and hope and plan for better things.

Good luck and God bless.

Answer 4

You really have made life quite difficult for yourself. But now that you are a single Mom with 3 kids .... it's time to be a survivor.

Hopefully you do know who the father of your children is/are and where to find them. The first step would be to get a court ordered Child Support for each of your children.

You definitely need to be working yourself. I would suggest that you try to find a job while the 9 and 7 year old are in school. The 3 year old could be cared for by a family member for the next year until this child is of school age. If you know of another single Mom or even a stay at home Mom who might be willing to care for the 3 year old in exchange for some help with her children on weekends ... that might help too.

As for purchases .... avail yourself of Thrift Shops or second hand clothing stores in your area. Also advise your family, friends and neighbours that you would be very interested in hand-me-down clothing for your children if they are going to donate it or toss it out anyway.

Toys for your kids are a must but they don't have to be the latest in technological wonders. Again .... your family and friends can assist you with toys at Christmas time and at birthdays. Don't be too proud to accept used articles.

My Mom was alone with two children for quite a few years. She was always very honest with us about what we could and could definitely not afford. It's given me good sense with respect to the difference between WANTS and NEEDS!

I wish you luck ... and please ... make sure that you don't add any more children to your family right now. Make sure that you do the very best you can for the 3 that you already have.

Hopefully some of my suggestions will be of some help to you!

Answer 5

First contact your local child support enforcement agency and apply for child support services...offered at little or no cost to you. Next, sit down and make a budget for yourself of all expenses for yourself and children. If you have credit card debt, contact your local Consumer Credit COunseling Service (which is through the United Way) and see if they can help you reduce your interest, payments, etc. Cut out any unnecessary expenses...cable, cell phones, eating out. Entertain your children by going to the library...they can read books and often you can rent dvd's or movies at no cost. Cook good healthy meals at home. Pack your kids lunches. Shop at the thrift store for good gently used clothing. Investigate whether you qualify for medical insurance assisatance (medicaid) or day care assistance with your local Dept. of Social Services. Also, see if you qualify for rent assistance with the local Section 8/HUD office.

Answer 6

I have been there and number one is to not live out of your means, a strict budget, that you watch every penny. If you have family ask if they will help with watching the children, while you work, and yes strive for a career that makes better money like a manager's postion. Good luck and don't despair, it gets better with time, the little ones get bigger, and life does get easier. Enjoy your kids as much as possible. I never had a vacation with my kids as I could never afford one, but make the best of all your moments, sing and dance and be happy, you have each other. It is not easy, you will feel very proud of yourself if you do it all by yourself, and your kids will have nothing but praise for you.

Answer 7

My mother raised four children on her own. Sometimes she worked 2 to 3 jobs. Do you have any family members or friends who could help watch your children while you are working, someone who understands your situation and would not ask for pay at the moment? Do you qualify for welfare? Are there any programs in your area that could help? Ask around, research. There's always some kind of programs that could help pay for day care or the babysitter. There is always a way.

Answer 8

A lot of states offer aid to single moms. Take the time to go to school and get back on your feet. You can also apply for help with child care, etc.

However working for the county.. these types of aids are used as stepping stones... not long term, please do not abuse the system..

But those programs are there to help you better yourself and your children.. take advantage of them, contact your county ss office and see what help you can get.

And WOW a lot of cynics on yahoo today.. all ready to assume that you just keep popping out children and could never financially afford them.... obviously by the ages and the fact that you are just asking this question.. you were able to whether by a live in boyfriend or husband at one time... But circumstances changed... if that is the case do whatever you need to do to get back on your feet...

Answer 9

First be relentless with getting child support, even if it means daddy has to go to jail. Once he sees how serious you are, he will get a decent job in order to stay out of jail. This is assuming he's a deadbeat who cares nothing of his childrens welfare. Also, low income insurance helps in that department. Food stamps are for people who are having a tough time as well, so in case your too ashamed like I've heard other people say, don't be because they are there to help us all out if and when we need them. Get the phone book out and just start calling, anywhere from the food stamp office to the employment office and ask for any info they have available in your area.

Answer 10

hey first thing you do is tend to the kids, if you have to file bankrupt to get rid of the bills to feed the kids you do what you have to do. Get rid of cell phone, and only hand home phone wher eyou can only dial local, if people want to talk to you they will call you. Then cable tv gone too. You shop at second hand stores for clothing needs. Pack lunches instead of school lunches and as far as baby sitting if you qulify for free day care take it. DONE IT and never took one food stamp, no goverment help, no medical cards at all and it can be done.