Child support?

Question

My step mother is one of the kindest, most wonderful women I have ever met. Her ex husband years ago took my stepbrother from her and for 12 years insisted she did not have to pay child support for my brother, instead she drove an hour every weekend to pick him up. She bought all of his clothing, paid medical bills, all kinds of things. She was a great mother. A few years ago her ex husband got remarried and decided to go after her for back child support and won! On what grounds does is it okay for anyone to wait years and years to claim child support on a child and then win? Is there anything that can be done about this rediculous ruling? I am so mad about this. My brother is going to suffer for this because he has been living with my step mother for a year now and is getting ready for college soon. The judge did not grant her child support for the year he was with her to come from the father (unfair and crazy). Oh, and she bought a car from her exhusband for my brother!

mattymom,

no, that's where I think this is screwed up. He never requested child support and then he just goes..hmm maybe I would like it. Now she has to pay back child support.

Answer 1

Your question supports my opinion on having everything written down signed and witnessed. It really sucks though that the legal system allows people to do this, there should be a time period to file after separation, miss the time period miss the payout. And i bet your step-mom never kept any of the receipts on what she did do. If I were her I would go get a lawyer and take this back to court, doesn't seem right bc now whatever she pays to the father isn't going to be used on the child.

Answer 2

Well in the laws eyes, all parents are required to pay for children.

I agree, in this situation it stinks.. but that is the way they see it. The court will only recognize what checks have been paid to the custodial parent, nothing more. Haircuts, cars and braces will not count.

That is just the way it works. It does work well for a lot of people with children and whom are not living together. But it does hurt some of the good ones also.

Never use a verbal agreement in anything legal.

Answer 3

Honey--it doesn't always make sense. I was in the same position as your stepmom. I have an ex, who had my children with him, and he was okay with me paying small amounts in child support. And as soon as he got remarried he came after me for a lot more and was granted the back child support. He and I had a verbal agreement, nothing in writing, so I had nothing to back up my claim of what he and I agreed on.
Unfortunately there is nothing you can do, and nothing your stepmom can do. She could try a new lawyer and go back to court but I don't think it will make a difference.

Answer 4

Wow. That's really low. You should talk to a lawyer. If there was never an order for her to pay child support n the past that might help. It would be a difficult fight. She should see if she can prove anything (the bills she paid). Good luck.

Answer 5

If she had a lawyer he was not a very good one. She needs to appeal the decision with a new lawyer. If child support was not granted when he took the son and no legal paperwork was written up regarding this, she needs to appeal the decision.

Answer 6

i hear what your saying, but today, support is required... no matter what he said... because she didnt get it in writing.

all of the things she bought are considered gifts, just as if it had been the father not paying but buying things.

there is nothing she can do about it, she has to pay.

here are some links for your step brother to help pay for college. please pass them on to him... they may help.

There are government loans & grants, and then there are private loans & scholarships.

try to aim for grants/scholarships more... they are not to be paid back. its confusing sometimes, but just keep applying. Scholarships usually have a 1 or 2 page application, and require an essay. Take your time with the essay, so yours stands out.

every big (and small) company you see (manufacturer, orgs, corps and groups also) all have grants and scholarships they hand out like candy. Walmart, Kmart, Target, Coke, computer companies etc etc etc

here are some links with a HUGE list of what is available. some you will need to copy and paste into a new window. also, fastweb (take the time to fill it in) will search databases and get back to you with a list of scholarships you qualify for.

Also contact all mens, womens associations in your state, they almost always have grants & scholarships. What ever field you are going into, contact the orgs, associations etc for them; Also check with professional organizations related to your career interests, such as the American Bar Association or the American Medical Association. they also always have scholarships. Research and dig, call then write. Its all worth it.

OVER apply; it doesnt hurt to have too many, and the extra funds can help with housing.

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Answer 7

it's disturbing how some are allowed to manipulate the court system. I am a divorced father with a 10 year old son. recently my ex-wife landed a job at the county court house where our child custody hearings are held. you can see this cant be good. I sympathize with your mom and wish her the best. fight the good fight!

Answer 8

your step mom needs to find an attorney and go through all the legalities and if he is living with her now then his father would be the one to pay as long as your stepbrother is in college. so this may equal out but she should talk to one asap.

Answer 9

if your step mother is one of the kindest, most wonderful women in the world 12 years ago why would she loose custody? anyway yes she will have to pay, this happens to men all of the time and they have to pay years latter sorry your sol

Answer 10

Your story doesnt make sense. He wasn't all of a sudden granted back child support. He would have had to have had an order in place and she did not pay. If he was granted back child support - it is because she was told to pay in the past and didnt.