i'mthat i have been in love with for about 9 months - he left me after we had a short relationship- (but i was the happiest time of me life - i literally fell in love with him the second i met him) and it has been kinda on and off for about 2 months (just friends with benefits) but i am still madly in love with him (the ridiculous kind of love) and now i'm 3 months pregnant with his baby - he didnt believe me and didnt want to talk to me about it for awhile cause he thought that i was doing it to keep him around and trap him - but now he does (and he has treated me like crap for about 3 months even though i still am here for him (what can i say i'm in love) )and he doesnt want it - i'm getting rid of it sadily - but now he is saying that he wants us to start over and wants me to be the woman he wants (which i will do) i just think he is saying all these nice things so that i will feel better about the abortion. what do you all think? i am 21
2007-03-28 07:25:43 · 23 answers · asked by Aldabella 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hello mother-to-be, you story is a sad one, but surely truly real. This experience of yours is not the first of a kind, they are common and you know why? It happens because you are a kind loving female. I know it will sound strange and hard, but I do suggest that unless you are treated like a queen, a dedicated mother and a sincere lover, do not chase your partner urging him to stay. Life will eventually become harder from your baby comes along and you will have enough to catch up on. You will not cope with a hard relationship as well. Being a single mum is not out of this world and most probably you will benefit more from it than sticking your head in deep sand of trouble. I do wish you well but I am not the ideal person to help you out in this matter. Do seek professional advice so that you life would have a lot of wonderful meaning and believe me sharing it with your son/daughter would surely have something to fight for.
Good Luck
2007-03-28 07:34:04 · answer #1 · answered by Janine 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's sounds to me like you could eventually become the type of woman to take a beating (literally) and stay with the guy all in the name of "love".
It's not a 1-way street. If he treats you like crap in a position this vulnerable (about to have an abortion) when you probably need all the support you can get then imagine what he will be like when you guys get into a fight or worse when you need his support and understanding again. You can do better but it sounds like you "love" him so much that maybe you should start looking up battered women shelters now. Or leave him and go get better. I bet you deserve it and can get it.
2007-03-28 14:35:41 · answer #2 · answered by Will H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sadly to say, you can't force a relationship to happen. There has to be two people on the same page. It seems you do care for him more than he does for you. But that woudl not be a good relationship because it is not mutal, you woudl still be lacking the kind of love and kindness that you wish he woudl give you.
I believe he wants you to feel better about the abortion and he's helping you go through it emotionally.
But I don't believe that a relationship can be forced to happen, it it doesn't happen naturally
There is someone better that you treat you like his queen.
2007-03-28 14:37:18 · answer #3 · answered by Rose 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to drop him. He isn't worth it. I understand your in love, but it sounds like he doesn't love you or care about your feelings.. Before you make that big decision about the baby you should think of it. No offense, i don't like that you said you are getting rid of it. That's a little mean. You are exactly choosing him over the baby. That's cruel. I am sorry i don't want you think I am putting you down, but you need to open your eye's and see what a bad person he is. He wants you to be the woman he wants. please He is the loser. not nice!!!!
I want you to be happy. I wish you the best. good luck <3
2007-03-28 14:34:36 · answer #4 · answered by scoopie110 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
great guy you have there! Get rid of It? That it is a beautiful baby growing inside of you if you truly cannot keep this child it does deserve life seek couseling there are groups that will help you a piece of advice loose the creep cause that is what he is! There are many couples that would love your baby please think on it hard before you do what you are about to do
2007-03-28 14:36:10 · answer #5 · answered by ken j 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you said the right words!! He is playing a game with you! If you have a place to go where you are safe (parents, friends) go! Leave him! He doesn't deserve your baby and especially you!
Find back to yourself and start a new life! And be sure you will find somebody who will love you as you are!
Good luck!!
Mirelce
2007-03-28 15:20:10 · answer #6 · answered by mirelce 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is probably a bit late for an abortion..Maybe not..
Why not just go full term & give it up for adoption ?
In any event..
Make sure you get a good Pre-Nup as the marriage
will probably not last long...
2007-03-28 14:31:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need your head checked. Your in love with him, but is he in love with you?, I dont think so! He is acting all sweet now because he wants his cake and eat it too! Are you aborting because of him or because you dont want a child?, very important. Heart breaking
2007-03-28 14:39:48 · answer #8 · answered by chemreaction 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At this point I would say don't kill your baby. Put it up for adoption and lose the idiot. They don't date anyone for a year at least. If you can't stop making stupid mistakes that wind up hurting others then get yourself sterilized.
2007-03-28 14:31:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bet that you never thought that your having a little fun would cost an innocent baby it's life.
2007-03-28 14:30:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋