I'm 32 weeks and so excited to have my baby shower for my first baby. Excited isnt the word...my best friend just found out she is pregnant yesterday but unfortunately will not be having it. Lets not get into the issues on that please, for whatever reason she just wont. Now I feel terrible. How am I supposed to bask in my joy next Sat knowing the sadness she'll be going through? How crappy it must be to finish up planning and decorate for a shower in that situation. Any sensible suggestions for me or for me to say to her? Thanks
2007-03-28 06:11:55 · 13 answers · asked by charli_red1218 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
that's a tough situation. if i were you, i'd tell her that she has my support in whatever decision she makes, and if she feels the need to step down from planning the shower, then i'd understand, there are plenty of other people that could help out. you're a good friend to take her feelings into consideration on this. just don't let this ruin the happiness of your baby shower.
2007-03-28 06:23:02 · answer #1 · answered by LoriBeth 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a decision she is making....and keeping your child is a decision you are making. If she has just found out that she is pregnant....she will probably have a few weeks to make the final decision. She may very well change her mind. As a friend the best thing you can do is be there for her with whatever decision she makes and, likewise, as a friend the best thing she can do is be supportive and excited with what is going on in her life.
Just be supportive and be there if she needs your help. Don't bring the topic up....wait for her to bring it up if she does!!
2007-03-28 13:33:18 · answer #2 · answered by diapercakesbybecca 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is be supportive of her decision..even though you may not agree with it. Be a supportive friend, and try not to let it ruin your shower. I can promise you that if she is your best friend, she'll want you to have the shower and enjoy your special time. She wont want you worrying about her and whatnot. Tell her that you are there for her if she needs to talk to you about anything.
Don't feel terrible. She may have good reasons to not carry baby to term. Although..wouldn't it be nice if best friends had babies in the same year..going to school together :)
Ahh, let's not go there. Try and support her. It's hard. But you have to be there for her.
Good luck and congrats on your baby :)
2007-03-28 13:18:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to really think hard about it before she decides to end the pregnancy. Also, adoption is an option! So many people would be happy to raise her child. It is a difficult situation, and there's not much you can do short of excusing her from finishing your shower up. You can ask other friends and family members to help out, using illness as a polite excuse. This one's tough...you should not be forced to give your happiness up because of her decision. She should have waited until after your shower to lay this on you. I'm not chastising her, but this will cloud your thoughts for a while at least.
2007-03-28 13:18:09 · answer #4 · answered by Stephene 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Its her decision to not have the baby. And that should not effect u in anyway. Shes doing what she feels is right. you need to be selfish in this situation. Your going to have a beautiful baby and nothing should get in the way. Have fun at your baby shower. Just like you will be there for your friend she will be there for you too. Enjoy it.
2007-03-28 13:21:48 · answer #5 · answered by outlaw_heart79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak with her about the situation. Tell her that if she doesn't want to plan the shower or come you will understand. You can always have someone else fill in for her. Go on with your special day and don't be upset if she can't be there with you--it isn't an act of selfishness on her part, it's an act of self-preservation.
2007-03-28 13:17:19 · answer #6 · answered by jilldaniel_wv 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're in a tough situation. However, her decision is her decision and you shoudlnt' let it detract from you and your upcoming baby. Express your sympathy to her, but that's about all you can do. If she feels like she can't handle the baby shower, ask someone to take over as hostess.
2007-03-28 13:16:27 · answer #7 · answered by poohb2878 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
if your friend doesn't want her baby, why would she feel sad celebrating the WANTED child of her best friend? she (and you) should be completely happy at that celebration.
it is her choice; if it's upsetting her, then maybe she should rethink her decision to end the life of her baby.
just a thought.
congratulations on your baby.
2007-03-28 13:21:33 · answer #8 · answered by Natalie M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for your friend. That said, you need to have a heart-to-heart with her and tell her how you feel. She has her own reasons for what is going on with her pregnancy and they have nothing to do with yours. She knows that. With her being your best friend, she will not want you to be feeling this way.
2007-03-28 13:19:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, first of all congrats.. but regarding ur friends situation dont worry about it.. after all its her decision and if she thinks she doesnt want a baby then she is happy without it so why should she be sad?
2007-03-28 13:17:09 · answer #10 · answered by Lemi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋