Would you be mad too?

Question

I'm very grateful that some friends from church are throwing me a baby shower. They have been talking about throwing this shower for about 3 months now. A few weeks ago one of them calls and says that the shower will be March 31, she sent the invites out in a few days and hardly no one is able to make it because of this short notice. I feel hurt because I've always envisioned my baby shower gaving over 10 people at it! My mom works night and needs to sleep and probably cant make it herself, and these are her friends. The party is being thrown in another city 30-45 minutes away and I have family coming in from out of town. Only my husbands sister is going to be able to make it, no one else from his family. This isnt like them to do something on a whim like this. Ugh! What should I do?

and also, I cant get my granny to stop taking rsvps for people. There are the two hosts names on the invite and shes telling people to basically give her the rsvp and then she calls and tells us to tell the two ladies. She never wanted to be involved in a shower before, because in the 40s and 50s no one threw showers.

Answer 1

No I would not be mad, a little disappointed because of people not being able to show up, but you just have to accept it the way it is. At least these friends from church are willing to throw you one. Be happy with the people that can attend. When traveling from out of town some people cannot take off from work at the last minute, plane tickets go up in price closer to the date needed, and some people already may have made plans for that day.

If your friends really wanted to throw you the shower and have a large turn out they should have planned a later date. Your mom might surprise you and come for a couple of hours.

To those answerer's saying to cancel it and plan one yourself, all I can say is How Tacky! I would be grateful for the people that are coming. I have had Graduation Parties that were missing people I invited, but I still had fun with the ones that did show up.

Plus, you may end up having a second baby shower. Good luck and be happy that there are some people that can make it.

Also, even though your grandmother did not want to be invovled in the beginning, let her be, she is helping in her own way and be happy that she is choosing to help.

Answer 2

I definitely know how you feel, because I wasn't happy with my baby shower either, even more because people from my church never got involved in it and didn't even come most of them. My only family here is my sister and my mom, and they took care of all the preparations but still didn't invite the people on time, and the friends that I invited didn't even bother to come or say sorry I couldn't make it. So with all that going on and my crazy hormones I was needles to say More than sentimental. BUT, what you can do now is ask your mom or aunt or sister if you have it, to organize or you can do it yourself a new baby shower for the family, and it doesn't need to be fancy or complicated but is a matter of making what you envisioned a reality, if you are happy the baby is happy and that's what this is all about. I know you are not supposed to throw a party for yourself but nowadays things are not so simple people is working and involved in their own problems and life, so even though you have a reason to get mad is better not to, because you don't know what your friends had to go thru to organize your baby shower, so be thankful and make the best out of it. Even better if you have two baby showers more gifts and more fun!!!
and congratulations

Answer 3

yes you have every right to be mad, i would tell your church friends while you appreciate the gesture, it just simply doesn't work for any of your family. Suggest a time that you think will work better, and deff. closer! This is your baby shower, and while Im sure you're happy they took an interest and really care, there was a lot of poor planning, and it isn't about what works for them, its about what works for everyone, this is a special time in your life, and you want everyone you love to share it with you. If you don't want to upset them and would rather have the shower this weekend so nobody's feelings get hurt, you can always talk to your mom and other family members about one that you would like to have just for family. That way everyone will get to come that wants to, and your friends feelings don't get hurt.

The number one thing to remember though, is that this is one of the most important things that will happen in your lifetime, and while a shower isn't everything, its important to a mother-to-be. You deserve to be happy and share it with your family as well, either way you go, you should tell your friends, that you appreciate them throwing you a shower, but you're a little hurt that it was scheduled to work around them, not your family and you.

Good Luck! Congrats on the baby!

Answer 4

This is your baby shower I think that it should be special. If you don't like the way the church is handling it start over from scratch. Call around to local hotels they may have some meeting space available. Im pretty sure that the church will understand. Tell them the situation that your family members are unable to come because of the distance and the date and time. They should understand that. I work at a hotel and we have showers all the time. It doesnt take very much to set up and the banquet workers may even be willing to help set it up.... Good Luck

Answer 5

You should talk to your husband....tell him that you want a shower. Consider the church shower a nice gesture....but you want a celebrating for your baby that people will be able to attend. Maybe your husband can suggest that his sister or mom throw one for you.

I know you must be disappointed!! But, worst case scenerio, you dont' get a shower. Well....when baby is a month old you can host a "Come Meet The Baby" lunch or brunch or something. Kind of like a shower....but only after the baby is here!!

Good luck to you.....

Answer 6

it does sound frustrating especially if this is for your 1st baby. baby showers are important for a 1st-time mom. but since someone else is throwing the party for you, then just be grateful for it. if you want another shower, then ask a close friend or your SILs to host it for you so that your friends and your family who were not able to attend could be with you. but that would not be practical.

suggestion: why not save the big gathering when the baby arrives? or during the baptism?

Answer 7

Sounds like you should of talked to whomever was giving the shower and set the ground rules......but you didn't so..you can't tell other people how to have your shower now.......so you go..smile and thank people that do come and have fun........hey we don't always get what we want and if that is the worst thing that ever happens to you you should feel lucky!!

Answer 8

It sounds as though your granny is putting a damper on this shower. If I were you I would replace her with someone Else's name as a host. She is sending out negative vibes to people and they don't want anything to do with the shower because of this. Have a honest good friend of yours take control. Hope this helps. Cocoa

Answer 9

Mad is not what I would be. You see your church friends are doing a kind thing for you. This is their show for welcoming you child into the world and give support for what you are about to go through during child birth. Appreciate them for the effort. They may not be the best planners in the world, but they sure are friends worth holding onto.

Answer 10

I would canceled the Shower.
And I would definately organized another one, MYSELF.
That means: just plan another day... with at least 2 weeks of notice...in YOUR city... so that people doesn't have to drive that much... and do it.. YOUR WAY.
Even if it's something very simple... like a BBQ kind of thing... maybe if you have something like that, people are more willing to come.
It's YOUR shower....
so do it the way you like it.

Congratulations for the baby :)
Wish you good luck and lot of fun!