father unknown on birth certificate?

Question

my ex gf is due our baby this year she is not planning on letting me have anything to do with the baby even though im desperate to and she is putting father unknown on birth certificate will i ever get to see my child? im also seeing my solicitor but she says to leave it till baby is born but i am desperate to find out more, can anyone help?

Answer 1

There are a few options available. First is to register the birth yourself, before she gets a chance to register it. Secondly, as you are unmarrried, you will need to apply for DNA testing to establish parenthood. Third is to write a letter to her asking her if she believes that this decision is fair on the child. If she is a responsible parent she should be aware that not having a father named on a birth certificate can be quite traumatic in later life for the child. See:

Answer 2

If you are in the UK you will not be able to register the baby unless you are going to lie and say you are married to your g/f. Where parents are unmarried and not living together, the mother only may register the child and has to put 'father unknown' unless the father is present at the registration to confirm that he accepts that he is the father. (My father did this when I was born in 1950 - in those days it was v shameful to be illigitimate - and when my mother died in 1976 I had to swear to the registrar that as far as I knew my father was really my father!)
I agree with your solicitor on an emotional level. A lot can change once the baby is born. Your g/f is full of rampant hormones at the moment and can easily change her mind. The less hassle and threats you put on her at this stressful time for her, the more likely she is to accept you when the baby comes.

Answer 3

Get a second opinion from another solicitor. You have rights,especially since you have expressed a desire to be involved in your child's life. You have the right to have your name on your child's birth certificate.
Your solicitor was telling you to hold off until the baby is born so she can do DNA testing to prove your claim. However you should be able to have all of your "ducks" in a row that the minute the child is born, she should have already have a court order in place to take for example cord blood rigth then to establish parentage and then have the courts establish visitation or joint or full custody to you.

Answer 4

I'm sorry to hear your ex GF is a selfish c*w and is not thinking about your child.

You need to get yourself another solicitor. Get one that specialises in family law. I'm sure they can go to court on your behalf and stop your ex ommitting you from the birth certificate. Write your ex a letter, copy it to your new solicitor and tell her you want to be a part of the child's life and that you will help to support the child both financially and emotionally. Make sure your solicitor gets a copy so they can produce it to the court when the time comes to fight for access.

The most important thing you can do at this stage is to keep your cool. Dont give her any ammunition she can throw at you at a later date. Make sure that once the baby is born you start giving your ex regular maintenance and keep it up. Keep asking her to see the baby and keep a diary of your attempts.

You need to be the sensible adult in all of this. You need to prove it is beneficial for your baby to have you in its life. If the court can see proof of this by way of financial support etc, you are almost guaranteed to get access to your child and have your name on the birth certificate.

Good luck

Answer 5

Whatever is the father never let to be the real father if he likes the child. Say that to her. She can be very sad about something you did to her, but refuse the real father to a child that it's more cruel than anything. You want to give/ recognise the child, it's great. What happened or will happen between you and the mother didn't happen between you and the child, so she should be happy about that. She should look for a man for herself, not a father for the child, because father he have already. Good luck

Answer 6

your rights are very limited your lawyer will adise this your best chance is to tred gently with the babies mother and hope that she will see reason that in years to come the term father unknown on the birth certificate can have adverse reactions to the child a feeling of displacement even after the child is registered if you both agree the certificate can be changed to include you as the father even listing your surname if required

Answer 7

How is your girl friend proposing to pay for bringing up the child? Child Support? The agency will require the father's name, if she puts father unknown then however much you may want to see and be part of the child's life the best will probably be to deny all knowledge and let her sort the problem out. do not answer anything from the CSA they will never let go otherwise.

Answer 8

aaww i feel so sorry for you, what is her reasons for it? i wish you luck xx

oh just another thought, the child maynot be yours and she doesnt know how to tell you, i really hope this is not the case, every child born should have a loving, caring father like you to look up to

Answer 9

Why doesn't your ex want you near the baby?

You should do what is best for the baby, and leave your feelings out of it.

Answer 10

at least if she wants money you can refuse on the grounds that she said your not the father on the certificate. but it sounds like you want to do the right thing so its going to have to be the through the legal route i think. could you talk to her parents. I'm sure if you tell them you want to support her they will back you up.