My boyfriend engages in activities that I disapprove of and it is getting on my nerves. However I do like him around to help me with the kids. Am I wrong to sacrifice my happiness in order that he will be a part of our lives??
2007-03-28 01:47:24 · 16 answers · asked by teetee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you shouldnt worry about what your family thinks about your relationship. all the matters is that you and your children are happy with this man. family isnt always right and i learned that the hard way. live your life for you.
2007-03-28 01:52:37 · answer #1 · answered by soto_a81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest talking with him and telling him your concerns. If he doesn't listen then you need to move on for the sake of the children. If he wants to be a loser let him be one without the kids around. You deserve better and you know it. Can you blame your family for disapproving? I am sure you can't. They love you and want what is best for you and the children. Give them a break. If they didn't care they would voice their opinion, right? So realize this guy is just a loser and move on with life. You deserve so much better than a guy like that and your children do as well.
2007-03-28 09:29:04 · answer #2 · answered by MOM OF ONE 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tolerating your man has got to be so hard for you; but its nice of you to keep him around tor the kids' sake. I'm sure he's very thankful for the crumbs you throw him. Maybe you can take the edge off your own pain with some romance novels; or an active fantasy life ... poor thing.
Or, maybe you need to try to find happiness somewhere else ...AND DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU IN THE *** ON THE WAY OUT!
2007-03-28 09:09:12 · answer #3 · answered by Sultan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps it was not the best decision(s) to have children with this guy???
What the heck kind of activities? If it's a once-a-month poker night with his friends, get over it. If it's methamphetamine running, call the cops. Probably it's somewhere in between.
You need to decide what you want out of life. A stable family, or a boyfriend and kids who probably don't know when mom and dad are finally going to split.
2007-03-28 08:55:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you how to handle this, and damn it, listen!
In any man-woman relationship, the couple should agree from the outset that neither will allow his or her relatives, especially parents, to discuss the relationship or the other party to it unless that other party is present. The offer to confront negative judgments as a team will stop them at once.
Simply be clear and firm about the fact that if they wish to belittle your choice of a mate, the parents must do it to his or her face.
My frau and I did this years ago, and it eliminated the necessity for listening to defaming and often incorrect kitchen talk from controlling parents.
It's the "Please-Don't-Talk-About-Me-When-I'm-Gone" (if you remember the old song) solution to one of the greatest dangers that a marriage can face.
Hey! Good luck to you and the children, honey.
2007-03-28 09:26:35 · answer #5 · answered by john s 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you having children with a man who is making you unhappy and who hasn't married you? Your parents have every reason to disapprove of this guy. If you were wiser, you would disapprove of him as well.
2007-03-28 08:57:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny you never mention what are his ACTIVITIES. So you're basically ready to settle on being a hostage. You'll put up with your BF's assanine behavior as long as he helps you with the kids?
From what I've been seeing here on Y/A today, although a screwed up situation, you are way ahead of the curve.
When I get home from work today,I am going to kiss my wife and we're going out to dinner. OMG!, I'm a lucky man!
2007-03-28 08:52:41 · answer #7 · answered by huckleberry1 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you don't like him either. Obviously no parent would like a man that keeps knocking up their daughter with no intent to sign on the dotted line. (But they have to realize it is more your decision to live like this then his) Actually you keep on making these mistakes in the per suit of happiness, moving on without the children's father will only make for more problems. Time to grow up and act like an adult.. both of you. Unfortuneatly you are bonded to this man via the children for the rest of your life.
2007-03-28 09:08:18 · answer #8 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are lots of people out there who would be willing to have a happy, healthy life with you and your kids. And would be better role models. You as a mother have to do what is best for you and your children. If he doesn't have your best interests at heart then no it's not worth it!!! You deserve the best for you and your children!!!!
2007-03-28 08:56:49 · answer #9 · answered by prettyfroggy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are wrong. Your happiness is not worth the pain and agony. And your kids see this, believe me!! They see your pain. Although it would suck at first for the 2 kids, I believe the 3 of you would be much better off without the father in the picture. He can always have visitation with them and not be entirely out of their lives.
2007-03-28 08:52:44 · answer #10 · answered by GirlinNB 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋