About a week ago 2day my ex got in touch with me again (we hadnt spoke in 4 months) and at the moment im very happy with my current boyfriend jamie. but since we started tlkin again i have put myself in a dilema, and its making me sick and i cant sleep at night because i cant stop crying. i now think i am suffering with depression cos when im on my own all i do is cry and i dnt wnt to get out of bed of socialise.
we ended our relationship because he felt i didnt love him and only saw him for the sake of it. so the nite he finished me (over msn) i was in bits and had to have the day off skwl cos it really destroyed me. i wrote him a letter telling him how sorry i am for never showng him how much he meant to me.
Jamie loves me to ******* bits and it breaking my heart that i have slightly stronger feelings for dan. dan has a girlfriend aswel but he is always mentioning my letter to me n how he never realised how i felt. he says he will always have somethng in his heart for me....
2007-03-27 23:08:33 · 7 answers · asked by To put it bluntly... 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
also when he is on msn it like he only comes online to see me because he tlks to me straight away. i feel guilty for my feelings for him because of his girlfriend lizzy and i would never put someone through the grief i had when dan finished me.
he asks me things like how long have i been with jamie, is he a better kisser, uno when we was together type questions etc.
also last nite he was askin wat i was doing and i thn asked him n he said "i can't exactly tell you what im doing lol, but nufin." and i was like errrr, and he said he wernt havin a ****.
then he had to go all of a sudden because lizzy wanted something, and he said "lol hard aswel, she askin 4 it". he was a virgin until probably last night. and it sounds stupid but it made me sick and upset me alot to think he was losing it to another girl, i was up all night crying after that. but i don't understand why he would start a conversation just to say all that! half the time its like he plans what he is going to say to me. :s
2007-03-27 23:09:00 · update #1
by the way, jamie is 17 years old i am 16 and dan is 18.
jamie is currently on holiday for 3weeks in autralia. so i understand that he has started talking to me at a most vunerable time for me because i miss jamie aswel.
2007-03-27 23:09:29 · update #2
A summerised verson of that would of been so much easier, but never the less!
Your last relationship (with Dan) didn't work out, whether or not you have issues or they have been sorted out, things will be weird. Also if he is so coward as to dump you on MSN then it shows what sort of person he is.
Jamie sounds like a nice boy. You say your 'very happy with him'. I would stay with him if i was you. But i'm not you. This is your decsion. No one else can make it for you.
If you have felt depressed for more than 2weeks it is an issue that needs dealing with. It's unhealthy to not want to get out of bed and to just cry all the time. I believe your depression (or sad period) can be easily resolved, if you let it. Something like this can be sorted, but if you let it get you really down it could cause some serious issues.
I'm just saying that because I've been through something similar and when I was depressed I thought about more stuff and my depression never got better. Although I wasn't suffering from this (it was to do with a boy who hurt me a lot) my depression could have ended much sooner. Please seek medical help if you don't feel happier soon!!!
As for you decsion, I suggest you stay away from Dan while Jamie is in Aussie. You could do something you regret.
Take your own time, think about where your heart is. Write a list of 'pros' and 'cons' about each boy if you have to. Please solve this quickly and don't string boys along, it'll hurt them because believe it or not, boys have feelings too!! I was quite shocked!
2007-03-27 23:22:51 · answer #1 · answered by ★☆✿❀ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like Dan is someone you have very strong feelings for. Could it be love? Maybe your first love? Maybe. Maybe not. Here is one of the issues imo about going from one relationship to another without processing the past one. Often you end up sometimes confused, in pain, and a bit depressed. Everyone needs time ALONE to process a past relationship. Yes, it is painful sometimes, but it keeps you from starting up with someone else before you process your last relationship. Then your heart is free and open to give fully in the new relationship. You need to step back now and really go through your feelings for Dan. Is it realistic, given the state of your heart to be with Jamie? Do you find yourself thinking of Dan when you are with Jamie? Could it be that you are simply disappointed things did not go well with Dan and you are going through the normal process of grieving a relationship that simply did not work?
Sweetie, I think you need to tell Jamie you need time alone because you moved too quickly into the relationship with him, before you processed your relationship with Dan fully.
See you will never figure it out unless you get alone time. Alone time leads to a clearer perspective..I promise you. Now also I was thinking you may want to encourage Dan to work on his current relationship, with his current girlfriend. Tell him you are not going to have an emotional affair with him online and you would not cheat with him on his girlfriend.
Part of this is going to be very painful but you will learn a great deal about yourself and how you process things. Time really does give perspective on relationships. Good luck to you.
2007-03-28 06:26:58 · answer #2 · answered by Suzanne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are plenty of men out there my advice is to dump that jamie guy cos he has a girlfriend and forget about the ex too because he was just trying to hurt you by saying he was hard....I doubt he got any at all considering he was talking to you and apparently she wanted some....Most women hate it if you even mention an ex gf let alone be talking to them on a pc when they want sex....I think hes still a virgin....Ask him and I think you will find the only thing he lost his virginity to is his left hand....
2007-03-28 06:17:34 · answer #3 · answered by naughtiest_nurse_of_em_all 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
let bygones by bygones. move on with your life! live in the present, not in the past and stop all communication with dan!
I've been through something similar but I got rid of my depression in 2 weeks time :P I'm ok now :D
best of luck
2007-03-28 06:19:12 · answer #4 · answered by sea_star 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I managed to muddle my way through that first part but about half way through I just kind of gave up, eat some ice cream, stay off msn, go to bed.
2007-03-28 06:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
forgot all dear and start relation with strong and joy full mind every one life not going easy some 'U' turn in life its reality
2007-03-28 06:15:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try not to compare or else u would end up loosing both.
be realistic and stick to the one who loves u now.
2007-03-28 06:40:39 · answer #7 · answered by Kumar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋