Would anyone try to save a 29year marriage after betrayal on the net.?

Question

He has told this person personal things about me .
i.e. Where i work, my shift times , that we have no marraige.
What do I do.

Answer 1

Get counseling

Answer 2

If this hasn't gone any farther than the Internet then it may be time to save your marriage. It was 31 yrs and female after female, not on a computer that caused an actual divorce on this end. So, things can be worse. If you two sit and discuss what's needed from both of you to be happy again after all these years things may work out for the best.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

Joan....there is obviously something wrong with your marriage. You have probably left him out in the cold. Have not been speaking to him and he has felt lonely and needed someone to talk to. Its not nice being together and ignoring each other one feels lonely. Perhaps if you spent more time together and learnt to re appreciate each other and have a different attitude towards each other things would change for the better. I dont think net relationships come to anything unless the people live very near each other. they are just getting things off of their minds to a complete stranger to feel wanted and better in themselves. I wouldnt worry much about this. Ignore it and be nice to each other and take interest in what each of you do. God bless. It will be OK I'
m sure. It will probably peter out in about a year and its only words in the air.... nothing more.

Answer 5

Unless talking to people on line is something that a couple are doing together, I think there is definately a real problem with the marriage. You both need to talk to each other to discover why your husband feels the need to talk to another woman, expecially without your knowledge. Counselling may help, but you both need to want it to work. I left my ex after 25 years of marriage and it certainly wasn't an easy decision, but in the end staying and making him miserable would have been wrong too. I wish you happiness.

Answer 6

This has just happened to me as well. We have been married for 20 years. We are going to counseling now every week. I found out in February. It had been going on for over a year. With my 31 year old niece!!!! ( we are 40) She never told me.
We have been like sisters. They emailed each other a couple times a week. His were complementairy( you looked stunning the other night etc.) hers were daily conversations with no indiacation of replys to his statements. She said she just wanted to pretend everything was NORMAL. He says it wasnt sexual he just needed reassurance of his "frail " ego. I feel betrayed by both. I know he is to blame but where does her blame stand? They would both do things together, take thekids to the pool while I was at work, go play pool go to ball games.

Answer 7

29 years is a long time! Don't chuck it away on betrayal on the net. He has been stupid and not realised what he has done. Give him a good telling off and make him realise what he's done, how special you are to him... walk away for a while and watch him come crawling back 29 years? My God I never even existed!

Answer 8

Communicate. Something was obviously lacking for him to look on the net in the first place. If you both agreee the marraige is worth fighting for then seek councelling. He needs to write to this person and tell them no more and let you see the letterand watch him send it as a token of his sincerity (if it isthere) to try and make the marriage work.

Answer 9

When you told him about this did he say he was just saying that,and that he didnt mean it?? if so its only you who can make that decision.

Some people almost lie to make friends or to get attention,if he did that 4 these reasons he has come unstuck!!
I think if you wanted to kick him out he would be gone by now,also if he wanted out why is he still there??

I would save my marriage after some serious ground rules!!
Good luck!!

Answer 10

Well...he has untrusting ways. Why did he say these things and why is he talking to someone online?? These are questions you need to ask yourselve and him. But moreso yourself. YOu need to communicate with him. Wether its the net or in person, its the same. Im sorry, but if you both want to try to get past this, I wish you the best. I only hope you can get past it. One of the worst feelings in the world is feeling lthat you can't trust someone you care about,

Answer 11

Why would he tell this person these things? Is it so she knew when you weren't at home? Well if they haven't met I would say you can get over it but if they have met it is another story. I would have gone off at him. I assume you did. You need to work out if you could ever trust him again. If you cant then dont try to work things out. Get a new life.