My fiancee is cheating on me over yahoo messenger, hes been talking to her for a long time and tonight I finally got my proof tonight when I saw one of his instant messages and he had told this girls sister that he didnt know if he was going to marry the right person and that he was scared and that he had feelings for this girls sister and that he loves her....I dont think I wanna be in this relationship anymore......what can I do to get out, I asked him about it and he said that he was confused.
2007-03-27 15:47:02 · 14 answers · asked by renee_0102 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It could be one of two things:
1. He wanted you to find out what he has been talking about online so that you two can have more honesty about your feelings. Simply, he may have been trying to connect with you.
or
2. He is dumb for getting caught and is looking for someone to talk to about how he feels because he has no one else that he trusts - including you.
My advice: You are getting advice from the internet just as he was so there is this commonality between the two of you. Go out for coffee or ice cream and try to talk about these things openly. That means you cannot be critical of him when he expresses things you may not be happy about. Don't let him be critical of you either - if he gets upset then explain your intentions about being honest. If that doesn't work then walk away. This is a growing process. After the honesty trip, you build trust, and then love can happen when both of you honor that trust and put each other before yourselves. Love is a verb. Being In Love is a noun, therefore it has characteristics. You must love each other to become In Love. After that, remember this: Life is 90% maintenance. 10% creative. Life is what you make of it only if you can maintain it.
2007-03-27 16:12:34 · answer #1 · answered by Spanglish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The opinions above define "cheating" as having sex with this other person. I disagree with this most strongly. I think to breach the questioners trust and form an emotional bond (or try to) with another woman is certainly cheating, it doesn't have to involve having sex.
Being friends with guys/gals over chat is one thing, but forming an attachment or relationship with them is another.
Is this any different to them cozying up together in the corner of a night club? I don't believe so.
If he is really having second throughts he needs to tell her. On the other hand he could be just cruising the net and flirting, sweet talking the other girl to try and get into her pants.
If you really love someone enough to marry them you have to set and then respect some boundaries.
2007-03-27 23:02:32 · answer #2 · answered by Ratsoo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is probably a good time to put the marriage plans on hold indefinitely, he has a problem and is going to need some professional help.
You are right in being angry and wanting to leave, and you have the right to do that. But I would immediatly call off the wedding plans. If he is serious about you, he will get help.
2007-03-27 22:53:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can actually cheat on the internet. It sounds more as though he had a conversation with someone regarding having second thoughts about marriage. DOn't play games with him - if you don't want to be in a relationship with him, do the right thing so you'll both be happy.
2007-03-27 22:55:07 · answer #4 · answered by Curry 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's exactly what I do for a living. I catch people cheating online.
go to my website www.Emailrevealer.com and order the "Dating service (Infidelity) Assessment
It's quick easy and confidential.
2007-03-31 13:17:21 · answer #5 · answered by Emailrevealer.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your fiance what you know and break it off with him. Since he is so confused you need to let him go and move on with your life and find someone who will not cheat on you. Good luck to you.
2007-03-27 23:09:27 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
guess what, he is just not into you that much. move on and find a man that loves you. don't move in with him and only date him. don't sleep with him until you are sure he is the "one". oh yea, you don't know if he is the one for at least 6 months... maybe a year.
2007-03-27 23:41:44 · answer #7 · answered by Patrick G 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just pack your bags and leave. I mean he is cheating on you ofcourse he isnt going to admit it to you. Just leave him or stay and deal with him being with other women.
2007-03-28 00:00:12 · answer #8 · answered by Lexi's mommy had twins! 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of him, your way too good for his sorry *ss. If you want you can check out my 360 page.
2007-03-27 22:56:10 · answer #9 · answered by brian 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
he needs to make a decision, but ultimately, i think you two need to go seperate ways. he was hiding this from you, there fore, is unable to be honest.
2007-03-27 22:53:38 · answer #10 · answered by Kaja 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋