I've been with my bf since January 14 of 06. Things were going well till he started doing criminal activities; stealing, smoking, getting speeding tickets...ect. We broke up in June last year, got back together a week later. He went to jail for unpaid tickets before the break up. He promissed to stop doing bad. We broke up again in october, 2 weeks later -back together. He went back to jail in november for the same thing. Well then another break up after his bro died in december and he asked me back a month later. He is now in jail for 1. unpaid tickets, and 2. stolen car. He wants to go to counsoling, asked me to tell all his friends that he wants nothing to do with them after he got out. He wants 1 on 1 with me, a fresh start. He also want to put a ring on my finger. He wants another chance. Should I give him one?
2007-03-27 15:27:15 · 15 answers · asked by hope 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Certainly you should. After all, it isn't like he ever lied to you. And, it isn't like he's made promises he failed to keep. Or, ever engaged in criminal activities. Lady, you know this guy hasn't changed. He's yammering on about how he's changed, but you MUST realize it's nothing new. Once he's out of jail, he's going to be exactly what he was before. A lying, hypocritical criminal. That IS true, and you know it.
2007-03-27 15:53:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
All this in just one year! Why is it that we humans can not (refuse, in fact!) learn from our own personal experiences?
Let him tell his friends - if you do this you will be seen as the heavy - the bad guy. And more importanly you give him an excuse, an out, to go right back!
Hard as it may seem, leopards DO NOT change their spots! Birds of a feather DO flock together.
Practice does not make perfect, it makes permanent. Right AND wrong!
And we are ALL responsible for EVERYTHING that happens to us! Ignorance is NOT bliss.
Yeah, give him another chance. After all, you probably have a long life ahead of you, and it might be boring! Who better to bring you drama on this scale? And without him in your life, you'd have to spend your money on shoes and other girly stuff! How drab! Who would post his bail and pay for his lawyers?? Oh yeah, my bad, we tax payers! I hope you have a job and have to pay taxes... for the education and therapy for more of these types of guys. With any luck you'll join the rest of us and be supporting their out-of-wedlock children! You'll feel great! I know I do!! Take him back - nothing less, and besides, he needs you.
Given your story and the board you posted in, I can't believe you have to ask a Q like this to decide what you need to do! Are you 12? Is this a joke?
2007-03-27 15:57:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not until he has proven that he has changed....and it is not up to you to tell all his friends that he is finished with them, that is his job, if he really wants to change....otherwise it is going ot make you look like you are controlling him, and he will just use you to say, she did that to p*** me off.
What women and girls have to realize is that we cannot fix them, there is only so much that we can do.....I would suggest to you that you leave and let him prove himself clean of all illegal activity. Unfortunately, you have shown him that you will take him back, even though he has not straightened up. You need to stick with it this time. Counseling will take several months, and even when it is over you still need to be very cautious. So far he does not have a very good track record for keeping his word....so don't be surprised if he is again blowing smoke up your butt. If it were me, I would leave and have no contact with him until you have seen that his name is no longer in the paper and he is no longer in jail for at least 6 months after treatment. If this activity continues, he is going to do nothing but bring you down with him....and I don't think that you want to go to jail as much as he is going.
2007-03-27 15:47:05 · answer #3 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like you have already given him alot of chances, He doesn't look that he will change, but everything is possible. I dougth he will change for you since you are just boy-girl friends, no kids no marriage no commitment means all he got to change for is you, but he has already fail in that more than I can count, but don't worry we can't change everyone. Good thing there is always someone for everyone. If you stay with him, chances are that he will continue and later will steal to feat your kids, and maybe even steal from you if he is on drugs.
2007-03-27 15:38:22 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
purely forget approximately approximately comments like that! i'm no longer speaking from adventure with tantrums. yet i think of each mom has had somebody come at her approximately something. climate that is advice or what no longer. i'm fortunate and often too oblivious to observe somebody it judging me till they are long long previous. i think of you dealt with the area purely high quality, extra desirable enticing in a controversy with the lady could have purely made her sense much extra justified, by using fact then it fairly is obviously you terrible temper. often times i ask your self whether those human beings even have little ones. And in the event that they do, did the toddler purely magically look on the age of 8? whats up bert... what proportion 2 365 days olds have you ever tried to self-discipline?
2016-12-08 12:53:50 · answer #5 · answered by adamek 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No.Cut your losses and let him go. Do you really want to be with someone who steals cars and whose second home is the klink? History is usually the best predictor of the future. You have already given him several chances to reform his wayward ways and look where that's got you. As far as the ring goes, he's just stringing you along, giving you false hope. Go by what he does, not by what he says he's going to do.
2007-03-27 15:37:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweety he's preying on the fact that you will take him back. I was with a guy like that. It's not a good relationship to be in. I'd make a clean break from him.
2007-03-29 05:20:23 · answer #7 · answered by MommyCaleb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to say it, but I wouldnt take my chances with this guy. I'm sure he's sweet and you love him, but a realtionship like this could get dangerous not only physically, but emotionally. It's always going to be like this rollercoaster going up and down. You need to save yourself before its too late.
i hope you are happy whatever you decide.
~paige
2007-03-27 15:33:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, this guy is affecting your ability to think logically. It is proven that we start acting like the people we hang with. Hopefully we won't see you on Cops!
2007-03-27 15:32:30 · answer #9 · answered by Fireanddesir 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him this could turn ugly for you;its not worth the trouble to stay good luck
2007-03-27 15:33:37 · answer #10 · answered by RENA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋