I cant trust my husband what do i do?

Question

Because of his background with women before he met me and i feel that he will cheat on me.I try to trust him specially now because I am pregnant with our first baby and I really love him so much.I just wish I could trust him.

Ok I understand what ya are trying to tell me and yes there was a point where i did trust him and then one day he said he was going to drop something off with his friend and didnt come back till the next day and i tryed to get him to tell me where he was at but he just said that they where drinking some beers and fell asleep at his friends house but my gut feeling tells me not to belive him maybe cause i was calling his cell and he never answered.so i think he has cheated on me and therefore i feel this way.

Answer 1

I'm with the others. If he had a history of being untrustworthy, then to expect him to be different with you was naive to be kind.

I pray that your fears are unfounded, but frankly there is little you can do. That trust has to be built by him, not you.

Answer 2

The key is to either part with your fears or part with him... you can't have them both and be happy and feel secure and loved. Has he cheated before on you? If not then you're off to a descent start... if he has, you have problems and you may need to start thinking about a future w/o him (e.g., get your finances straight, start saving up rapidly, etc.). Right now you have no evidence: but, your gut is driving you crazy! Right?

What you now have to do is possibly focus on affair proofing your relationship, which, while not foolproof, does reduce fears and may reduce the risk of him cheating.

The most essential key is to know and understand fully that you are 100% responsible for the success of this relationship: he is 100% responsible for his side. Do your 100% and he will generally follow. If either of your drops to 50%, the relationship will begin to have problems. How do you do this... both of you need to repeat the behaviors that lead to your getting married (e.g., stay romantic, dance and laugh often, tickle each other, talk openly and honestly, play in the sand and water often, climb trees together, read a book and discuss it together, join a book club or other club together, rent a hotel room monthly, be intelligent and interesting, have a life of your own, be warm and understanding, refrain from arguing and nagging needlessly- as he should do, etc., etc.). One reason many marriages fail is because the couple stopped doing what worked-- they stopped doing the things that made it all worthwhile.


Good luck

Answer 3

I know when you are pregnant, you tend to have lower self-esteem. Nevertheless, you just need to be very independent at all the time either you are single, married with or without kids. As life is so versatile, you have to be strong to cope for all changes. Now all you can do is to ensure you have proper diet for your baby. Once you have delivered, there are much more things apart from your man's trustworthy for you to deal with. At this moment, it's best to get him involved with each stages of your pregnancy, attending pre-natal classes together with you as both of you must be ready to take up the responsibilities as father and mother to your baby. A responsible man will not slip his role as a father and loving husband in marriage life! Be strong and be tough! Blessing you always!

Answer 4

If you were judging his background then you should not have gotten married.
Alot of men go through the games part in their life earlier on and when they are ready to settle down they do.
If you are already worrying about this, it is going to effect your marriage and relationship.;
You should be thinking positive about your union and make it the best ever.
You are living in the past, you will never have a present or a future if you continue this.
It is not good for the baby, if you are stressed about these things.
If he is being a good hubbie, then enjoy it and don't look for bad things to happen.
You need to change your focus and expect good things.

Answer 5

Sometimes leopards never change their stripes. I feel sorry for you as trust is the glue in every relationship. Your husband will do what he wants to do...you can't focus on this. You must look out for your own well being and take care of your baby. Try having a discussion with him on your concerns of trust--this is really important. Try some faith in your life too. Peace to you.

Answer 6

ur hormones may be messing you about. When u're depressed or hv low mood we tend to think a lot and some negative thots r magnified and positive ones minimised. You may hv bn his turning point for him to hv decided to settle down and spend the rest of his life with you. Which could mean that there's something special about you.
Try not to stress too much and relax for both u and ur baby's sake. That constant worrying bout ur hubby cam make u ill.

Answer 7

sit him down and tell him your feelings, and also tell him you are prepared to do what you have to do to keep your life peaceful, if he throws it all away he will pay the consequences-that you dont want it this way but you are only telling him you wont take any indescretions [affairs] lightly-
also, from me to you--your hormones are raging during pregnancy right? and your emotions? don't get all upset-most of what we worry about never happens my dear. don't give your imaginations free range--it will drive you crazy, be logical, has he cheated ?? no? don't suspect or think things unless you have positive proof. Pray to Jesus for peace-

Answer 8

You love him, but you don't trust him. I don't get that. I think that if you have true love, you have to have trust and respect. You made the decision to marry him and have his baby, if he hasn't done anything for you to not trust him, then let it go. For the sake of your baby and your marriage. You can't judge him on his past when you already knew about it when you chose to marry him. It's not fair to him.

Answer 9

If he feels emotionally fulfilled and secure with u, I don't think he would long for the old days. Congratulations on ur pregnancy. U both shd be happy n looking forward to becoming parents.

Answer 10

I don't think that you should have got pregnant by him but if anything start saving up some money in an account he doesn't know about and when it's time to leave you'll be prepared.