Ok I'm married but husband was married before me and she cheated on him with a few guys he tried to make it work but gave up and she is not a nice person I knew her when they were married. I guess my question is that I don’t understand why is it that some men can not let go? He told me he doesn’t have feelings for her anymore and he doesn’t see her she lives half way around the country, and I believe him when he says he doesn’t have feeling for her. But he is nice of a guy some times and he doesn’t get mad at her he had to contact her over some stuff about a car they, and she was being a complete B*** but he wont be firm or take control. It drives me nuts we have talked about it. I just need some help understanding it. Thanks I don’t know what to do he doesn’t understand why I get upset when he has to talk to her. Help!
2007-03-27 13:00:46 · 11 answers · asked by nikie_atkinson 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Their are no kids, and to Kurt I have only bin with one person my husband and that was after if was married so don’t lecture me about the bible I know if quite well and so does he that’s why we both waited till we were married before anything physical happened.
2007-03-28 05:03:08 · update #1
I don't understand either . he loves you shes just like an old family member and why should he bother getting upset over her she not worth it not to me anyway and not to him either . Don't you get it he,s happy with you shes nothing
2007-03-27 13:10:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I sure that you will not like this answer, very few ever do. The situation with divorced people or even people who have had intimate sexual relationships outside of marriage is that they have shared their souls. God built us to have one sexual partner for life, with the exception of widow ship. How is a marriage consummated; through sexual intimacy. The bible gives two reasons a couple may divorce. There are NO provisions in the bible for remarriage (except for a widow). I challenge any bible scholar on earth today to show me where the provision for remarriage is contained in the bible; it does not exist. I can't totally explain why it works that way, it just does. Why the exception for the widow, male or female, my best thought is that the late spouse is not having sex with your ex best friend or someone else. If you do not believe in God or His word take a look at some of the questions in the "marriage and divorce" category of yahoo answers. Many are just like your question. Misusing your body with multiple sex partners (in life, not at the same time) will only set one up for much heartache.
2007-03-27 20:25:39 · answer #2 · answered by Kurt 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if they both signed on a car..then it was probably something that had to be taken care of...
but look..don't be insecure...he is WITH YOU NOW... he is not with her..and sometimes there will be conversations with the ex-..it is part of life..you DO move on..but (especially if there are kids) there will be circumstances that require talks from time to time..
you NEED to know that this could last your whole marriage...
I am not aware of how long they were married...but think of it this way...
I love my wife...and if she screws up and cheats on me..as much as she may not love me...and probably doesn't to be that disrespectful...it doesn't mean that I KNOW that she is cheating yet and I will still love her as I did before she started down that road..i will feel deceived and hurt...but i have been with her over 12 years...so is that love going to DIE all at once?? I mean I am not 16 anymore..so..I might divorce her for what she has done..as I deserve to be with someone who respects me and loves me..but..I will have feelings from time to time..because I WASN'T the one who screwed up..
I also am quick to forgive and forget...because God knows I am not perfect enough to just hold it over her head for life..I have made my fair share of mistakes...so who am I to not realize that others can equally screw up?
2007-03-27 20:17:37 · answer #3 · answered by juanes addicion 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps he is only pretending to be nice so that you don't think that he is vindictive.
I hope he isn't bottling it up inside. But remember, not all divorces are bitter like in the movies. Some are civilized.
2007-03-27 20:07:07 · answer #4 · answered by quizzical 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people that act irrational and are b***** want to get a reaction from people. He was denying her that. He wasnt being a sissy or whatever, he wasnt dropping down to her level. He was killing her with kindness and those types of people hate that
2007-03-27 20:05:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man He just has a good heart regardles of how that ***** treats him he just respects her and Im sure he treats you really well So don't let him go.....
2007-03-27 20:06:02 · answer #6 · answered by Lil' K. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are jealous. You don't want to be reminded that he loved her at one time and you may be scared that he still has some feelings for her.
2007-03-27 20:13:17 · answer #7 · answered by QT 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Men love bitches! I'm telling you he is still attracted to her
becasue she is a *****. Now it is your turn to be a *****
and tell him to forget her and get on with more important things.
2007-03-27 20:08:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its natural, maybe she was his first love? and he jst cant forget her, and even though he doesnt have feelings for her, he doesnt want to be nasty to her either, simply cz hes not taht kinda person?
2007-03-27 20:04:54 · answer #9 · answered by trendy_gal 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it's the way he is.....some people are just always nice....no matter the situation.....it's not such a bad quality
2007-03-27 20:11:32 · answer #10 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋