i was with my ex for 13yrs and he treated me horribly but for some reason i just cannot get over him...it's been 1yr 1/2 since weve broke-up...i ache so badly and miss him dearly. He wants nothing to do with me though...why doesn't he love me? how can he just move on instantly & not miss or think of me?
2007-03-27 12:58:42 · 20 answers · asked by firechic 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
being a divorced woman, myself (married 8 years, divorced 5), i always keep my best friend's advice.
take it one day at a time. if you can't take it one day at at time, take it one hour at a time.
time heals all wounds is a very cliche saying, but it still holds true.
why doesn't he love you? that's really not your problem, girl. that is his issue. i'm sure you are a wonderful woman.
the other advice my friend told me when i left my ex is "Don't look back". just keep moving forward. spend time with friends and family. just being around them will make you feel better. i spent a lot of time hanging out with my brother through my tough time. we would spend all night just cracking jokes like we were kids again.
chin up! you can do this. i know you can. i have. :)
2007-03-27 13:06:59 · answer #1 · answered by Hello Kitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on with your life! I don't mean any harm by saying that to you, but sometimes you need to have a wake up call when you feel sad over a breakup. Just think about how your life can be better without him if he has moved on, you can really meet someone who will treat you with respect and love you in a way that you never even imagined. People always think that because of the years they had with a person means that they are suppose to be with that person, years don't mean a thing if it was pure hell!! Good Luck!!
2007-03-27 13:12:12 · answer #2 · answered by sweet p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly how you feel, I went through the same thing. The things that helped me were to stay busy, help other people, read, put puzzles together, strip floors, or anything else you can think of that would let your mind get away from the situation, even if for awhile. Time does heal the pain you feel in your heart. Since he treated you badly come up with ideas of how you deserve to be treated and try to find that kind of a man.
2007-03-27 13:06:18 · answer #3 · answered by nutnut1957 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, i do not imagine there is a few thing which will make it harm a lot less. He could attempt being smooth for sure. many each person is disenchanted of their first time by way of the indisputable fact that's absolutely not as satisfying for the females by way of the indisputable fact that's for the guy. definite, you should have a towel below you because no longer each person bleeds an same nor hurts an same both. What human beings do not say is the way you'll sense afterwards about your self and about him. you may sense accountable or maybe no longer. you may change into emotionally extra connected to him making your self extra susceptible. If he breaks up with you, it is going to harm you extra. i could propose you're making efficient this guy is really particular and merits to acquire this particular present from you. If he treats you suitable and loves you or no longer per chance some thing you opt for to imagine about in the previous jumping in. i don't understand how lengthy you've been mutually yet be careful because from time to time I guy worls on a woman to get her into mattress, and at the same time as they have her, they dump her. this can no longer inevitably be the case right here, yet you should imagine about it none the a lot less only incase. extra valuable secure than sorry. talking about safe practices, i wish you intend on utilising proper safe practices so that you aren't from now on getting pregnant or seize any diseases. definite, even your first time, you may fall pregnant. ALot of females I have spoken to, say they choose they'd waited and not had sex so early. Becasue in additional than a number of cases, your first guy, is totally not the perfect guy and the heartbreak is inevitable and fully sucks!!! very few foodstuff for concept!
2016-12-02 22:15:27 · answer #4 · answered by meran 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to love yourself in order to love someone else. You have low self esteem and the fact that he didn't help along the way with it shows the kind of man he really is. He doesn't love you, never did or he would've never treated you like crap, get over him and face the fact that he has move on. focus on yourself on how bad is your self esteem and when you learn to love your self another man will learn to love you for who you are. Get some dignity, some pride, but most all some love. If he treated you like crap then what is it that you miss about him? Girl you need to get yourself a life, and some love.
Meditate on your self, you need a man to make you feel loved or special, you are already loved and special, don't let a jerk tell you other wise.
2007-03-27 13:16:15 · answer #5 · answered by Monica A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your power back! You've given him the ability to define your happiness! Here's an explanation. You love him and he knows that. He's told you that he doesn't want anything to do with you. You feel as though he 'took your heart' and walked away with it. You feel as though you can't get it back until you get him back. Since that is not going to happen, you have to make the decision that YOU are taking it back. It doesn't belong to him.
How to do that? Don't allow him into your thoughts any longer. Every time you find yourself thinking about him and feeling those pangs, try something like EFT http://www.emofree.com/ You can download the manual and practice this. It is very simple, yet effective. The bottom line is that you have to get him out of your head. That's taking your power back and putting it back where it belongs. With you!
2007-03-27 13:06:57 · answer #6 · answered by Plexed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he treated you badly, there's a chance he didn't care all that much. I don't mean that in a bad way. But, it could be why...sounds like he just wasn't a good guy, and doesn't deserve you anyways. If you were with him for that long, than there's obviously going to be some pain for you, it's natural. Eventually you'll move on and find someone better...just try to concentrate on new and better things for yourself. good luck
2007-03-27 13:04:01 · answer #7 · answered by IndiHippi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that you feel so bad but there isn't much you can do besides move on with your life. you probably miss him so much because you were with him for such a long time. he doesn't sound like a very nice person and you will meet a nice guy out there that will treat you good. just keep your head up and your heart open. good luck to you :)
2007-03-27 13:03:53 · answer #8 · answered by me 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So let's see. He treated you like crap and you not only wasted 13 years with him plus the year and a half of moping around? Do you think you are going to live forever? life is horribly short. You better get yourself in gear and find someone else, whatever it takes.
2007-03-27 13:18:19 · answer #9 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He never put as much of himself into the relationship. Rather than pondering why he doesn't love you still, you should be working with a therapist to figure out why you still love him. You can't change him, or how he feels. But you can find out why you're drawn to the impossible, and be better prepared for a healthy relationship in the future.
2007-03-27 13:14:56 · answer #10 · answered by Jacky S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋