Can someone please help I have phone anxiety yet this girl insists that I should call her?

Question

I swear I should have never gave her my phone # all I wanted her to do was verify her identity(because I met her online) So I said leave a message, and she did and thought it was going to be over, now she wants me to call her and actually have a conversation with her, what will I say. My hands are sweaty, and my heart is pounding all because I have phone anxiety help here people. I'll love you to death : )

Someone said I might be bi-curious but I can never see myself dating a girl

Answer 1

First off, calm down and relax. Write down some possible conversation starters on paper. It may sound weird but it's better to read off paper than to just mumble a bunch of "umms". Secondly, what did you discuss online? If you discussed movies, interests, etc. continue those conversations on the phone. Get to know each other. Ask her what she does for a living or what she does for fun on Fridays - anything to start a conversation. Once the ice is broken, you'll talk for hours. Good luck to you!

Answer 2

Social anxiety can cause these feelings, which can also lead to severe depression,
http://www.socialanxietyinstitute.org/ds...

if not you could be suffering from Generalized Anxiety
Disorder..http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/general_anx...

There is hope; I've been there, and still am there, it is a long, hard struggle. I recommend
Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/cognitive_b... worked best for me, with mild anti-anxiety meds. I suffered from social anxiety for over 15 years. I've tried individual therapy, and group therapy and studied psychology for 10 years, as a profession, but also with the hope to cure myself.

Depending on your comfort level, you could go to a psychologist that practices CBT and specializes in anxiety disorders, seek a group therapy, or create one. Usually those that do attend the group therapy are a bit more high functioning because as you know, it can be difficult to speak in a group.

Another idea is to see if there are any local research studies being conducted that you could participate in.

The program that finally worked the best for me is this one: http://www.socialanxiety.us/findinghelp.... and I was lucky enough to have a structured behavioral group to go along with it. Sometimes the people that actually attend this program come back home and form groups.

I recommend a mild anti-anxiety med in addition to CBT therapy.

Any questions, let me know ... I can't tell you how much this has improved my life!

Answer 3

Don't take yourself too seriously.
Call her and tell her exactly what you wrote on here. She will certainly laugh alot. Not at you but with you. Her hands are probably sweaty and her heart is probably pounding also.
You were a little quick at giving your phone no. but now that she has it yumust make the best of the situation. I'm 53 and know alot about women !
Good luck pal !

Answer 4

tell her you would rather not because you have phone anxiety. Honesty is the best policy in this situation. If she thinks your weird then you know she will not be a loyal friend to you.

Answer 5

Just tell her about your phone anxiety and that you're more comfortable talking online. If she's not a psycho, she'll back off.

Answer 6

juss call her up n be yourself....dont try to impress her by sayin things...just try to keep the conversation as less personal as u can...hopefully this helped...thanks for da 2 points

Answer 7

Don't call...who cares. You shouldn't have to waste any of your time talking to someone you don't want to. Just screen your calls.

Answer 8

You could call the phone company and have them change your phone to a different phone number.

Answer 9

You don't have to call her back if you don't want too!, or you just call and let her know that you prefer to chat on line.

Answer 10

oops.
ignore the calls