I'm in fact, a FTM (female to male transsexual) but everyone thinks I'm gay. I'm very short (I'm 5'1") I have a "gay voice" whatever THAT means. I guess I have a slightly "tenor" range. Definitely not feminine but not overly masculine and deep either. My favorite movie is a musical (Rent). My favorite dog is a Yorkie terrier. I have been told I have flamboyant facial and hand expressions, and I get excited in my speech (something apparently straight guys don't do too?) I like to do interior decorating, and I'm in the healthcare field. I can't fix a car, I hate football, and I'm a pacifist and not into violence or aggression or "marking my territory" at all.
On the flip side, I drink beer, I like porn, I like woodworking and carpentry. I like home remodeling projects, I'm good at science and math, I abhor the color pink, sometimes I wear my clothes straight out of the laundry basket all wrinkly, and I can be a bit of a slob at times.
Everyone assumes I'm gay, should I
2007-03-27 12:07:10 · 3 answers · asked by I_color_outside_the_lines 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
kudos for you for being who you are and open about it, maybe take some voice lessons to train your voice to be lower, don't let people get you down : )
2007-03-28 04:47:16 · answer #1 · answered by TRACER 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should just be whoever you are.
You may want to take up a martial art or something for your own protecton. You probably heard about the TS kickboxer in New Zealand or wherever. It was a bit tough growing up for her so she learned how to fight for her own protection and for sport.
You can try to cultivate a few more stereotypical male interests, though self-acceptance and inner peace should not be neglected either.
On the voice, you can practice lowering it. I don't recommend smoking, but that can deepen the voice. It is also a matter of how you inflect. Does your pitch go up and down, or does your volume go up and down? While everyone tends to vary both of those to a degree, it seems that men vary their volume more and women vary their pitch more. There might be differences in eye contact as well. Women may be more personal and look into the person's face more, and this may be disconcerting to a guy, especially when it is done by another man. Watching your hand gestures might help too. You want to communicate power rather than vulnerability.
It may help to join clubs and organizations where there are a lot of guys you can bond with and places where you can get help and support at communicating. I joined Toastmasters because I felt I could use some help with my public speaking skills. In turn, it has given me more confidence, and I am surrounded by good role models.
These sorts of issues are common for TSs. So many of us are told that we need to be a part of the TG and LGBT communities, and a lot of us are made to feel that is all there is for us. That is okay for those whose needs are served that way. But staying in the community and only being exposed to people in the community make it difficult to relate to people who are not in the community. There are skills needed in the mainstream world that are not taught in the LGBT or TG communities. Yet for some of us, the best skills we have may not be enough to be accepted by mainstream folks. So we are in a sort of limbo, even though the promises of transition include leaving a limbo state and becoming a complete member of the sex that corresponds with our gender.
2007-03-28 16:31:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those damn stereotypes...I'd say stick to dating straight & bi women, but my view might be a little biased.
Bisexuals: a pre-op's best friend.
2007-03-28 05:44:03 · answer #3 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋