I was sooooo in love when I met my first true love - my ex boyfriend. We was together for 3,5 years. He was always looking at other girls, he had one acquaintance. It hurt badly, but I never said anything. When I left abroad for 3 months, he started dating this “friend”. Of course it ruined our relationship. So I went to work abroad for one year. Naturally he got together with that xxx after few weeks.. He was texting me when I was away that I was the best he ever had and he won’t be happy ever in his life. But he is still together with her. I realized that this year apart hasn’t changed anything. It still hurts badly. We don’t talk anymore.. maybe sometimes a few sentences on internet, but very rarely. But I think about him all the time. Last time he said that he likes that girl, but he can’t say her that he loves her and he hopes he will with the time . HOW CAN HE SAY IT TO ME?! I don’t know what to do? Shall I meet him? But I have my pride! But I don''t want him to be with HER!!!!
2007-03-27 09:43:50 · 16 answers · asked by Elisabetta 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he is playing you. He know that you love him. He wants the best of both worlds. It was just a few weeks after you left that he got with her. I think he was with her before you left. I know that heart ache hurt like hell but you deserve better than him. If it was me and I told you that I love you. I would of wait for you till you told me to move on. But that is me, I'm not the normal guy every one meets. Just move on and fight the pain the best way you know how.
2007-03-27 09:53:57 · answer #1 · answered by masterzuaba 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. This is the love of your life and you know think that you may never feel this way about anyone else but him. So take a time out tell him that you love him and will always be there if he needs you but since the both of you are apart maybe the both of you should take this time to think. Now this does not mean that you or him will have to stop being with other people. This is the old saying that if they love you they will come back. Let him deal with his girl-friend talk to him on a friend bases no more then that, if or when you do move back together ( or maybe he will follow you) try at the relationship again but don't put yourself as second because he will start doing it to you on a regular until you cut him off.
Now if you really are serious about him ask him to move were you are ( ask to see if the both of you can tried again to see if it works out) if he really loves you he will.
2007-03-27 10:07:37 · answer #2 · answered by De-De 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From your description it is not that your ex left you, but that you left him. You weren't married to him, so there was no covenant between the two of you... and when 3 months (which is a looong time) turned into yet another year on top of it, what could you really expect? It's not fair that he isn't allowed to move on with his life.
You say you love him, but you're actions speak differently - you left him, and it seems to pain you that he is trying to move on. Consider the last sentence in your description: "But I don't want him to be with HER!!!". Sounds pretty angry and petty to me, almost as if the ex is a possession and not a person, and you don't want anyone playing with your old toys... maybe that's a bad analogy.
It sounds like he was seriously in love with you and you broke his heart. He's trying to get over it and move on, but you're not letting him.
Decide what you want. If you really want him and love him then go back to him, period. This sentence: 'But I have my pride!' is one of the saddest things a human can believe - your so-called pride will make you miserable, bitter, unhappy and alone every time. If you truly love him, go back to him and tell him. There's a good chance he's still in love with you too.
If you aren't serious about having a relationship with him, stop keeping him in limbo. Cut the ties, move on. He's already mentioned he is trying to move on and date this new girl but can't say he loves her. That's because he's still holding onto the memory of you. Both of you are in pain, you have the power to make things better one way or the other. You just need to decide.
2007-03-27 09:55:43 · answer #3 · answered by Jon S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your problem is u r still standing in same place and not moving forward,.thats y when u look at your life u cannt see any love ,so naturally your mind chooses the only one that it had so u miss him,u need to get into a new relation and build love into it,find someone authentic and genuine ,and u will forget him forever(if u need real serious advice about anything be free to contact me ,been in your shoes and makes a pleasure when i help ppl out )it sucks i know but u can do it be strong
2007-03-27 09:52:12 · answer #4 · answered by reifguy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over it! and NO don't meet with him or talk with him anymore! He's a womanizing cheater and whatever woman is unfortunate enough to really CARE about him, will have her heart broken over and over again.
There is a nice decent man out there who will love you more than you ever dreamed possible, and you will look back on the 3.5 years that you wasted on that jerk and wonder what you ever saw in him in the 1st place!
2007-03-27 09:49:58 · answer #5 · answered by JEANNE B 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
R u Italian?? Girl just 4get it! who can leave u 4 someone else ,doesnt deserve u anymore! But u dont want that girl n his life right???? then do one thing ! go to him,meet him n say u still love him.M sure he will come after u leaving that girl.! So there u r! u can show n take d revench??? now if u feel that he really loves u then go ahead or just kick him out how he did wid u!!!
2007-03-27 09:53:07 · answer #6 · answered by sherry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is totally playing around with your emotions. Please stop talking to this jerk!! he is not worthy of you. Thinking of him all the time is only hurting yourself more. Try to move on, I know its difficult but you have to! Find an occupation ,or activity you like that could help you get your mind off of him.
I hope you will be able to move on to a better life with someone else one day soon!
2007-03-27 09:50:41 · answer #7 · answered by Jakie22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie, just look at his behavior. and what he's telling you. and there's no telling what kind of lines he's feeding her either. you don't need a guy like that in your life. trust me. my best friend just went through something very similar, but she was married to the guy. he just seemed like the nicest most decent guy in the world, and seemed totally devoted to her. but it was all a lie. she found out that through out their 3 yr. marriage, he'd been cheating on her, and the girl he's been cheating with is pregnant with his child, and he is now cheating on her also. it's tragic, but I know my friend is going to be much better off without him.
I'm just afraid the guy that you're all torn up over would do something similar to you. he's obviously with the girl he wants to be with, and he would probably still like to see you, and have sex with you, but it just sounds like that's all there would be, otherwise he would have already told this other girl that he really loved you and broke things off with her completely.
I know it's hard, but you have to want to get your mind off this guy, and really make yourself do it. when you accomplish that, you will be ready to get out there and meet someone who deserves your time and effort. and then you will have a chance at true happiness.
Best Wishes
2007-03-27 10:15:41 · answer #8 · answered by atiana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well im so sorry for u hun but the truth is geting over someone is one of the hardest things ive ever had to do it isnt easy but im trying u have to take each day at a time.it will get better trust me on this.
2007-03-27 09:56:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to have to tell you thins but he is playing with your heart he is keeping you on the back burner just in case it doesn't work out with her. He has is doing this so he wont be without anyone and wont have to go with out sex remember he is a guy and he is using you. I'm sorry to have to tell you that but i would forget him as much as it might hurt trust me i had to do this myself once before it sucks but it is so worth it hand in there!!!
2007-03-27 11:46:40 · answer #10 · answered by nikie_atkinson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋