what are the positive effects that divorce has on children?

Question

also, in what kind of magazines/journals can i find more information on this?
tnx for da help^^

Answer 1

All three of my kids would say they thought the divorce was positive. They had been exposed to a lot of verbal abuse and the divorce taught them that they don't have to settle for being treated disrespectfully.

Answer 2

I would have to say that if the couple argued & fought 80% or more, the kids would no longer be a part of that kind of life. The kids need to be in a calm home. This home should have an abundance of love, caring, nurturing, selfless parents/step parents/ g/f or b/f of the bio parent. The home should of a divorced couple must feel more relaxed & comfortable. And lets face it...divorce doubles the kids "stuff". 2 birthdays, 2 Christmas gifts, 2 Easter baskets, etc. Hopefully the kids can have more peace after the divorce than during the marriage.

Lets face it though, a lot of couples put the kids in the middle til each child turns 18 and for some it doesn't stop there! Divorce is horrible on ALL those involved. Very small percentage actually do what is BEST for the kids.

In my 3rd divorce, my most recent, we are doing what is BEST for our little kids ages 4 & 6. NO fighting over custody or visitation. The kids live with me, their mum, and are welcome to visit their dad when ever he has the time. Which he does do a better job NOW than during the marriage. He's had some classes & lost visitation due to child endangerment so he knows what he must do to keep seeing our kids. This makes it easier to get a long AFTER the divorce than during the marriage. Our children are doing much better with the worst behind us! Good luck to you!

Answer 3

My parents were the ones who stayed together for the children. I can say from the kids' point of view that that's not a good idea! They constantly fought or ignored each other. They separated once and got our hopes up getting back together. It's stressful and my sister and I were just frustrated and tended to take it out on our friends and our school work. I don't know what would have happened if they had divorced earlier (they were married for 18 years), but I do know this: As soon as the divorce started, the stress started to go away. Now my parents are friends and are around each other because they can be, not because they have to be.

Answer 4

If both parents are unhappy the kids pick up on this and will react to it. Also if there is a lot of fighting between the parents this causes stress and anxiety for the kids. Living in two separate but peaceful homes will benefit the kids immensely. Sometimes as adults we don't see how our actions affect our children - step back and review the past few months/years and visualize different situations/events that the kids have witnessed and put yourself in their shoes. You could check with your pediatrician to find out some books or magazines or journals that deal with these issues or go to the public library and ask the librarian where books that deal with these issues are. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 5

The only positive affects are if there was some sort of abuse in the home, physical, mental, or if one of the parents had a drug or alcohol problem and now that parent is gone. Other than that, whether parents get divorced when the kids are young or old, it hurts all the same and they won't understand, no matter what you tell them.

Answer 6

Divorce does not have a positive effect on the children. It may alleviate the fighting, but that is just trading one negative situation for a less negative situation, not a positive one. The only positive effect is if the couple goes to counseling and works on their marriage so that it works for them, and they can create a loving and stable environment for their children, together.

Answer 7

Honestly, it usually causes more problems than anything else. My friend's son is in therapy because of her divorce, and he's been acting more violently. At a teaching conference, we were told the #1 factor in children's grades was whether or not they came from a two-parent home, so sticking it out for the sake of the kids really is a huge deal! Hope that helps :)

Answer 8

I am a divorced parent of 2 and I think the best thing to come out of this situation for my children was that the parents each take more notice of the children when they are there and maybe even spoil them with attention they would not have otherwise gotten had the relationship continued. Did that make any sense to you?

Answer 9

No more having to sit at the dinner table or in their bedroom etc. listening to their parents fight. That's probaby the worst part of being involved in a bad marriage for a kid. Sometimes it's much better that two people split up, rather than "stay together for the kids" like they always say. Kids know when they're tension in a marriage and it makes them scared, nervous, etc. Ending that tension lets them breath a little easier. As long as the parents remain involved together and keep their disagreements out of the way, it's better for the kid if they just call it quits.

Answer 10

As a teacher, I can tell you mostly divorce is painful for kids and they have alot of trouble coping and dealing with it. They often have poor attendance and lower grades and often don't care. BUT - when faced with abuse, or violence, drug use or drinking, protecting them is the only viable solution. Read a chapter in the book "Freaknomics" about what happens to children when they feel unwanted, as an example.