I found out my wife is cheating and has been doing it for a long time.
She’s taking accounting in College and does not have a job. I pay all the bills. She is afraid that I will cut off support and she’ll have to quit her life long dream of becoming an accountant just in order to pay the bills. But she’s still calling him on the phone and whispering sweet nothings to him and he still sends e-mail saying “I love you so much, its ridiculous”. He’s poor and cannot help him. I’ve filed for divorce, giving her $50,000 and a brand new Mazda 3. Should I continue to pay her an extra $2000 per month (for rent, food, etc.) until she finishes school in 1 year? I don’t want to be cruel and leave her helpless. I don’t want to destroy her future., that would be so cruel! I sleep in the living room. She takes the new car and visits him daily.
2007-03-27 06:07:09 · 42 answers · asked by honesty_counts 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She doesn't care that she is hurting you, why should you care.
2007-03-27 06:11:41 · answer #1 · answered by Backwoods Barbie 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Dude, are u an idiot? If my fiance was cheating on me with another chick, he would've been gone!!! Why should her dreams matter to u. She basically messed up your dreams of a happy marrige so she could get her infidelity on. Then she goes to school with him? U are definitely crazy if u don't leave her alone. I know u don't want to be crude and unruly, I understand that, but sometimes, Tough love is a must, and in this paticular situation, this is a definite must. Believe me, it will be better in the long run. And then she has u sleeping in the living room?!!!! Oh, she really has got to step!!! Step ya game up and get even!!! 2 wrongs don't make a right, but all I'm saying is, If she got a new dude, u should get a new chick and flaunt it in her face and she how she feels then. Karma is a ***** and she will definitely get the worse end of it all. Trust me... it never fails.
2007-03-27 06:26:08 · answer #2 · answered by sassyfox2007 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't pay your wife to cheat on you. If she picked a bum who can't keep her that is her fault. She a grown woman who made a choice. Why do you want to pay for her mistakes. Honey she is playing you like a fiddle. Don't let her use you anymore. She can finish her degree and be an accountant it just take her a little longer. You have been more that genious.
You will not win her back by being kind. She has not been kind to you. Remember the old saying what goes around comes around. She needs to have a little pay back for cheating on you. Don't let her use you anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-27 06:30:11 · answer #3 · answered by springer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should look in the mirror and ask yourself, do you deserve to have her drag you through the mud like this. It is one thing to stay with her if she did it once, but to have her continously doing it? No, I think you should just let her go. If buying her a car AND giving her $50,0000 isn't enough to support her, then she needs to make her lover get a job. You need to just wash your hands of her and find someone who respects you enough to not only appreciate you, but to not cheat on you as well. A marriage takes both parties to make it work, not just one person to work hard at trying to keep it together. Put her lazy behind out, finalize the divorce, and find something better. She is definately not worth it.
2007-03-27 06:21:46 · answer #4 · answered by cinnatigg 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't want to destroy her future? What about yours? What about the commitments she made to you on your wedding day? Let the loser that she's cheating with worry about her bills. All you are doing is keeping her up so she can keep him up. It's women like her that give the rest of us a bad name. Move on and move her out. They're plenty of women out there who would love just to spend time with you, not take your money and expect you to pay their bills. Put your foot down. No car, no money, get your bedroom back.....any human being deserves to be treated better than what she's doing to you. So sorry.
2007-03-27 06:21:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Holy s**t dude. You gave her what? And why??
Most guys that find out their wives have cheated pretty much give them a swift kick in the pants and that's it. You've already been super generous and I think that's all you need to be.
If you have extra money you just want to give away, find a charity that can use the money for something worthwhile. Otherwise, you'd be doing this girl a favor by showing her that she reaps what she sows.
2007-03-27 06:17:01 · answer #6 · answered by headshrinker 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The key is "it is her future." She chose the struggle when she cheated. We all make choices and must deal with the consequences. You should have the consequences of another's choice. It would be good for her to grow up and not use that "my dream" line to continue to use you. Get on with your life and let her go be her own "happy." Life long dream bit is a guilt trip she should be on and not you. I sense you will make a great partner to somebody else. Go do it.
2007-03-27 07:48:59 · answer #7 · answered by Healthy Lifestyle Geek 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious? You can't possibly be for real! Who cares what her "dreams" are? You had dreams too, right? Like a long a happy marriage with a faithful spouse.
Leave right now. Turn off the computer, pack your stuff, go to the bank, empty out the accounts then go see your attorney.
If she wants to realize her "dream" then she can have the "boyfriend" pay for it.
2007-03-27 06:13:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
OMG you are such a nice guy !!! you don't deserve this.. She brought this onto her self. Did she say she was sorry for the affair ? seems to me like she is taking advantage of you for your money but she wants to be with that guy. Just get the divorce. pay what ever the judge rules and move on with your life. you deserve something much better than this Best of luck
2007-03-27 06:13:59 · answer #9 · answered by Samantha 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If 50 grand isn't enough for her to finish college and pay bills then she can always get a loan. Save you're 2000 and go to Italy or something.
2007-03-27 06:13:01 · answer #10 · answered by crazy savage 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
She is being heartless and cruel to you and using you as a piggy bank. She loves this other man and is just using you for her financial gain. I would divorce her and would not have given her one extra penny of my hard earned money, She doesn't care about you or your feelings so why should you care about her career? If she wants it let the other guy deal with it.
2007-03-27 06:16:54 · answer #11 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋