newlywed...?

Question

My husband and i have been married a few months now. b4 that we lived together about a year.
He has this really, REALLY disgusting thing he does though that has totatly turned me off from him. He says he has bad "acid reflex" and every morning i wake up 2 the sound of him hacking in the bathroom. NOT throwing up just clearing the pounds of mucus from his throat.(he does have med. 4 it too) One of the very first times, i met his dad he did that noise and his dad said "thats why a girl has never stuck around" im sure he was kidding but SH*T its nasty! He'S done it since ive known him but im now 15wks pregnant and its just grosing me out more & more and ive about had my max with it. I try 2 be nice about it by askign him 2 stop but he replys with a "i cant help it!" its getting so bad i dont even find him sexually attractive anymore. Bein pregnant has also turned me away from sex for a while too but this does not help!!! how can i get him to stop? or is there anything that will help him?

Answer 1

My wife does that too.
We have been married for 15 years.
Just ask him to quietly close the bedroom and bathroom doors.
If it is a master bath in your bedroom, ask him to use the other.

Answer 2

My bf coughs in the morning to a point that he sounds like he's gonna barf but never does. He doesn't even have meds. He just does it. I've told him that it grosses me out, but he still does it.

In the end, it's just not that big a deal. So he coughs. I'm not walking away from a perfectly good man because he coughs in the morning and grosses me out.

Of course, I'm not pregnant and married either. I suppose that might make a difference how I would feel. The nesting instinct is probably kicking in within you nice and strong and you might have some compulsion to make everything perfect and ready before your child arrives, and that includes fixing things that are broken with your husband. I don't know.

Guess I'm just saying keep things in perspective. If that's the only thing that you can complain about, then it may not be that bad in the grand scheme of things. I do understand that you feel grossed out though. Perhaps instead of asking him to stop, which he can't, ask him to perhaps go to a different bathroom further away from your master bedroom and do his hacking there before he comes back in. You can't tell him to not cough. It's an involuntary reflex to clear the lungs. It's like asking someone to perpetually not sneeze. Tell him that it makes you want to barf and being pregnant with his child is making you very sensitive to barfing.

Answer 3

He's got a congestion problem. Be glad you don't have it. I constantly go through this too. I've had x-rays of my head, etc. - I've tried everything. Doctors don't have much advice for this. Except that they offer this help: at the drugstore, these are over-the-counter meds. No prescrip required. Try one of them, follow instructions!, VERY carefully.
#1 to try: Loratadine, Claritine is the same, but this cheaper$> at Walgreens or better is Sam's Club! WalMart?--I'm not sure. This may be the best thing to do.
#2 to try: at Walgreens - Wal-Fed - same as Pseudoephedrine or Sudafed but cheaper$. The only way you can get this is back by the pharmacist and FROM him/her...because it's legally "guarded" since there is an ingredient in any pseudo product that is a meth ingredient. ALSO!!!!---continued use of this (past 2 weeks) will make you cranky, argumentative, and other bad attitude problems. Be VERY careful about this continued (daily) use.
#3 to try: Mucinex at Walgreens...but at Sam's Club WalMart? is the exact same thing at a MUCH Cheaper$.
#4 to try: get a prescription from your doctor (he'll want to see you...they have to legally be careful)...the prescription is for Allegra-D.
I'm now using the Loratidine (above) WITH MY DOCTOR''S PRESCRIPTION for Allegra-D. It's o.k. to take both of them at bedtime. Been doing this for over a year now and helps greatly!!
THis Allegra-d + Loratidine (which is same as Claritin) combination is the best.
Please have patience and understanding.
He probably has headaches too, doesn't he? It's because that congestion gets into his sinuses too. And there is pressure to cause headaches...which are not too pleasant! And makes you irritable!
What a life. My wife is understanding. That helps so much. So you have to be too, no matter how difficult this might be for you. I REALLY HOPE AND PRAY THAT ALL THIS MIGHT HELP SOME.

.

Answer 4

well, i dont know about anything medical to fix it.... but still to help you out, i think you should just be really really honest with him. If you just casually ask him to stop or quiet down, he might not take you that seriously and just consider it nagging. So you should have a serious talk with him.... and expalin that since you are pregnant your tollerance isnt what it used to be (unless you think that after having the baby, he will just start back up again). Tell him that you really need him to make a sacrifice for you.... all he needs to do it close the door, or if you still hear him, he should just do into another part of your house. But you have to be completely serious with him and honest so that he understands that he really needs to change it. Dont say anything about not being attracted to him though, because that might be too much for his ego. Just say that it is having effects on your relationship.

sorry I couldnt help you with getting it to just stop all together though! Good luck with your baby :)

Answer 5

Does that sound pretty nasty, but you said you lived together for 1 year. He didn't do this during that 1 year you two lived together or it just didn't bother you? It seems like it's a health problem, so I don't know if you can get him to stop. Try going to another doctor to see if something can be done about it....say an operation.

Answer 6

You lived with him for a year before you married,I think that is enough time to get to know about his bad habit or habits but,know after three months of marriage you suddenly find them unacceptable.Well,if you still care for him and don't want an early divorce,soundproof the bathroom,that way you don't have to listen to him fighting with acid reflux and he doesn't have to listen to you barfing in the bathroom due to early morning sickness.

Answer 7

I recently had sinus surgery. One thing they had me do afterword was called a sinus rinse. I know it sounds terrible, but its a saline solution you squirt into your nose and allow it to run out. It clears out all that terrible mucus and is available at the any pharmacy. It has the same feeling as when you get water in your nose during swimming, but it does clean out the area without all the noise.

Answer 8

Sounds like his body is overly acidic.This is caused by a bad diet which produces the mucus that is forced out his body during the night.So have him see a doctor and balance his body ph.

Answer 9

Girl, accept him for who he is. You married the guy. That means you love him to a certain extent. It doesn't have to be a completely happy relationship. 99.999999 percent ad infinitum of relationships make do with acceptable happiness.

Answer 10

You knew this before you married him ??

Your being prego makes a difference of acceptance level