i mean on little stuff like people askin for money or for my homework to cheat or other stuff like that???? my friends and my mother say i need to grow a backbone and stand up for myself, but for some reason i just cower??? what's wrong with me and tell me im not the only one!!!!
2007-03-27 03:40:50 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
for more serious stuff i can say no but other stuff no
2007-03-27 03:46:19 · update #1
You're not the only one, everyone finds it hard to stand up to other people. Look on the net for "assertiveness" and learn more about sticking up for yourself. If you don't, your problems will get much much worse. People who take advantage of others will home in on you and make your life miserable. It is uncomfortable to stand up to other people, but you have to do it and you'll be better off for doing it!
2007-03-27 03:45:56 · answer #1 · answered by searching_please 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not alone. I can't say no very good. But as for cheating, that one is a no no. Helping is one thing, but not cheating. People take advantage of people who can't say no. I know from experience. After a while of it though, you learn you have to say no. I love helping people out, but if it is a constant, sometimes you just have to stand your ground. Take money for instance. We have tried to help other people out, but when it affects your own financial situation, you have to hold your ground. And if it becomes a habit. And you have to think, what is this person doing for you and would they do the same for you, in the same situation? Not saying no can lead into some trouble too. As a teenager, I couldn't say no. I would start by saying no, but was talked into things. That is how I experimented with drugs and sex. The best advice I can give is to not be put in that situation and use what your conscience tells you. Remove yourself from as many bad situations as you can. And you have to learn from your mistakes. If a person does seem to use you, then you need to reevaluate your relationship. Should this person really be my friend? Not saying no will most likely always come back to get you. I know.
2007-03-27 10:53:45 · answer #2 · answered by jle_dje 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your not the only one, you avoid conflict or hurting someones feelings because you care about what they think of you its okay to say no sometimes you dont want to be known as passive your whole life. saying no everyone once and awhile lets people know they cant walk all over you, and if they are your true friends or family they wouldnt cast you into a pit of flames everytime you do decide to have a back bone.
2007-03-27 11:01:43 · answer #3 · answered by iCantAidYou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I am the same way. I think I am a people pleaser. That is why I can't say no. I have gotten better over the years though. It is even hard for me to say no to my kids. So your not alone.
2007-03-27 10:49:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can't say no either, but i've set some ground rules. like no cheating durring class. before ok, but durring no. money not more than three dollars. don't worry, just set some rules. if these go well then raise them a little bit. good luck!
2007-03-27 11:46:37 · answer #5 · answered by islandgrl2011 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Asserting yourself is not easy for some people. You need to get some form of assertiveness training through classroom work or books.
2007-03-27 10:44:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is going to happen when somebody offers you drugs?
Sometimes you just have to say no!
2007-03-27 10:45:28 · answer #7 · answered by snapdragon747 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋