i won an award at college and there was a ceremony mum turned up and obviously had been drinking my partner told her boyfriend and now she wont talk to me she thinks i said i was ashamed of her i didnt just said i was disappointed and she has cancelled my daughters 4th birthday party what do i do i love mum and have never fallen out with her before.
2007-03-27 03:20:57 · 19 answers · asked by chris s 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
mum was annoyed i didnt say anything face to face but i didnt want to hurt her feelings she does have a drink problem and i wish she would accept help she denies having more than 1 drink but your facial movements dont change like hers after 1
2007-03-27 04:06:30 · update #1
Tell her you wasn't ashamed of her and that you were glad she came tell her you love her and you can always throw another party for your little girl and that she can help out fingers crossed for you
2007-03-27 03:27:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak to her yourself when she is sober. She can take her bad mood out on you but it is terrible of her to cancel your 4 year olds birthday party.
Let her know that you dont want her about you and your family when she has been drinking - it is not about being ashamed its about her obviously having a problem if she is going to turn up at an awards ceremony mashed. Tell your mum that you love her and hope that she comes around.
Good luck
2007-03-27 11:03:39 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Claire - Hates Bigotry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mum, no matter how flawed, is the person who brought you in to the world. Therefore she deserves slack sometimes. As other people have said you do need to go and speak to her and tell her face to face, no matter how hard it might be that you care for her and you did want her at the ceremony. If the time is right say to her that you care about her that no matter what happens you still love her and that as a concerned child you want the best for her and her drinking is hurting you because it is hurting her. She may or may not understand or care what you think, at least in the future when she is able to absorb what you have said she will thank you for taking the time to show you care. I keep my fingers crossed and offer a prayer for you.
2007-03-27 15:27:24 · answer #3 · answered by guitarcjj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send her a note, very simple....just say that you love her and miss her, ask her if you can take her out to lunch...give a specific date , place and time, tell her that you would like some one on one time so that things can be worked out. Include that if she can not make this date and time to give you a call and you can make other arrangements. At you lunch just be up front, tell her what you think was mis-understood and how you really feel. Be careful not to trash on her boyfriend, you don't want to put her o the defense...the intention is to heal your relationship. Good luck!
2007-03-27 10:42:28 · answer #4 · answered by catywhumpass 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to explain to your mum how you felt and that you would never be ashamed of her, make sure she knows that you love her. You never know what is round the corner. My mum used to drink but i would try my hardest not to fall out with her because i always knew that one day she may not be around - sadly she isn't now and im glad that we were on happy terms when she died otherwise i would have never forgiven myself. Good luck
2007-03-27 10:32:34 · answer #5 · answered by shez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it was probably inappropriate for your mum to drinking. Does she have a drinking problem? Has this been an issue in the past? Maybe she may need some professional help. My father was an alcoholic and i was very patient in helping him to quit. You obviously love your Mother so all I can advise is to meet with her face to face an let her know how much you lover her. Then try and focus on her health concern.
2007-03-27 10:28:57 · answer #6 · answered by Devdude 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
i think that you should wait for her to come around she is obviously childish or has issues. i can't believe that you want to make up with your mother after she has cancelled your childs birthday party. i mean seriously what kind of grandmother would do that. i think that she is being really selfish and if it was my mother i would be making no attempts to make up with her. i would not be speaking to my mum and would only do so on a serios apology from her. your mother should not have done anything why is she punishing her child and her granddaughter for something that your partner did? she needs to reassess things and in actual fact it wasn't your partners fault either. it was her own fault for turning up drunk. i would be telling my mum that she is being really unfair and that she should not have turned up drunk. i would also tell her that cancelling your daughters birthday party is selfish and inconsiderate and childish. it's up to you but i would be waiting for a big apology after punishing my granddaughter for something that she had nothing to do with
2007-03-27 10:32:38 · answer #7 · answered by confused 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mum is probably paranoid through drinking, tell her that you love her but that she is drinking too much do sent really matter how much she drinks.
ask her to get some help and that know it wont be easy but you love and will support her at this time
It may take a couple of attempts before she can even begin to stop
good luck
2007-03-27 12:14:50 · answer #8 · answered by D D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and talk to her, she does not have to talk to you if she does not want to.
But if this is bothering you then go to her home and talk to her. Tell her you love her and this is bothering you, tell her you are not ashamed of her but was hurt that she showed up drinking.
You have every right to be hurt that she showed up drinking to some thing that was so important to you. It si not your fault for feeling this way you are allowed your feelings.
Maybe she is more upset with herself because she knows she was wrong. At times people get mad at us but in reality they are more mad at themself but they take it out on us. It is unfair but it happens.
The best thing you can do is talk to her, love her and let her know it and give her time.
Also tell her it is unfair for her to cancel her own grand-daughters party because her grand-daughter did not do an thing to deserve it.
She will come around she loves you but you should talk to her, it may not go like you want but if you can get the words out she will hear them and in time they may sink in...
2007-03-27 10:32:16 · answer #9 · answered by Tonya R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go see her and talk to her face to face to resolve this. Remember though, if you think your mum has a drinking problem, you shouldn't leave your child alone with her. Tell her this fact also and she may find reason to stop drinking.
2007-03-27 10:30:28 · answer #10 · answered by Hi its me again 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋