My boyfriend told me yesterday that he is not sure he wants to continue our relationship, he said he is not motivated and enthusiastic anymore and he is not feeling happy with me. He has been very stressed these days with his job, he works full-time,looking for a new job, attending interviews. He doesnt get along with his boss so that adds to his stress. He's been distant with me since he has been told he won't get his promotion. I took his distance personally and was questioning him about our relationship. He tried to explain to me that he needs time alone but I got worried.Yesterday he told me he thinks he should leave and he said he needs time to think and he'll call me this week to talk about this. i havent replied to him as i'm giving him the time he asked for. I am really upset and I am really afraid of loosing him. Why does he need time to think and why does he want to talk to me about it? Is he going to call me it's the end and it's over? We've been together for 3 years.
2007-03-27 01:25:17 · 15 answers · asked by violet b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can't force someone to stay with you. He may just need some time alone to realize what he's got. You never miss something until it's gone. That holds true for people, too.
You have every right to be upset, but if he is having doubts, then he needs to figure it out in spite of what the outcome may be.
2007-03-27 01:33:32 · answer #1 · answered by Pom♥Mom Spay and Neuter 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people pull away from the ones they love when life gets tough, it's not easy to handle. However if you can give him a week and then call him. Don't give him any trouble about his distance, it's really not personal and should not be taken personally. Let him know that you want to carry on your relationship and that you understand that he is going through a rough time and that you are there for him if he wants to talk about it and or vent about it. Hopefully things will work themselves out.
2007-03-27 08:38:07 · answer #2 · answered by freyja5683 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only thing you can do at the moment is give him the space he has asked for and be there if and when he is ready to talk. It does seem a shame that he doesn't want to talk to you and receive your support, especially as you have been together for such a long time. Perhaps this is the way he needs to handle things. Just be there when he is ready to talk. Hope it works out okay for you.
2007-03-27 08:30:39 · answer #3 · answered by Beanbag 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is never going to work hun. I've checked back - sorry - yes you have asked LOADS of questions about your relationship - they are riddled with insecurity, low self eestem and mistrust.
After 3 years - seeing each other approx once per month is NOTHING LIKE ENOUGH! It's more like having a virtual boyfriend. You really can't know each other can you??
Maybe I'm wrong - I WOULD LOVE TO BE. Yet... with all this - still your boyfriend wants his own space???........
............I wish you could find someone else, I really do. x
2007-03-27 17:06:01 · answer #4 · answered by emilybronte 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you poor thing! your guy does sound stressed out but it doesn't seem to be with you or your relationship so that's a good thing. maybe you should give him the time he's asked for and wait for him to call, try to avoid the temptation of moping all over him and getting weepy but instead be positive about it all(at least in front of him) and make sure he sees the confident beautiful women he fell in love with, good luck and i hope you two are covering each other in slobbery kisses by the weekend x
2007-03-27 08:39:04 · answer #5 · answered by deborah g 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First give him time. I am quessing you don't live together which is a good thing. Be a friend foremost and a love second. If it doesn't work IT IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD! Just hang in there.
2007-03-27 08:31:59 · answer #6 · answered by steinerrw 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had something similar. Just be very patient. He is stressed and cannot give attention to anything else. My boyfriend has done it a couple of times so I AM a bit worried if it is just work.... Good luck to you.
2007-03-27 11:14:50 · answer #7 · answered by Hubbba_Bubbba 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's feeling unhappy with the situation not you. he can only make himself happy. so its best to let him have his space. men need this time to figure out what to do next. he probably hasn't been in this situation before and doesn't know how to deal with it. its seems a little unfair not to open up to you because you could give him the support he needs,he doesn't realise what he is doing to you he's thinking of himself at the moment.hope things work out for you both. best wishes x
2007-03-27 08:49:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
R u sure about his love?My suggestion, just wait until the time that he promise u to give u a call.U should reply him for the time he asked u before...Be flexible.Make him feel secure.The more u upset, the more he refuse.
2007-03-30 04:40:55 · answer #9 · answered by Mell 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 years is a long time, But if he doesn't love you then it will be best for the both of you to be separated because it takes love on both sides to make a relationship to work..
2007-03-27 09:36:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋