My best friend keeps putting me down.?

Question

For the past 2 months, my best friend at work has become very nasty and picky.
She is always putting me down saying that I look tired and worn-out or my make-up looks drab.
We used to be good friends but lately she seems to attack me first thing in the morning.
The other day I wore a new outfit - most of the other people said I looked fine, but she said the colour didn't suit me and the skirt was too tight.
I'm beginning to feel ugly because of her comments.
How can I deal with it or how can I deal with her?
thanks,
getting depressed.

Answer 1

Don't get depressed honey, get a new best friend!

Your best friends should try to lift you up, not put you down.

She is not happy with herself and/or her life, so she attacks you.

My best friend is going through a hard time right now, has been for a couple of years. Actually her hard time could be OVER, but she is choosing to hang on to bitterness and anger and has found a perverse comfort in staying in victim mode. I was trying to build her up just the other day - make her feel good and move forward so that she can start feeling happy again. Guess what? She got totally p'd off and went into attack mode. She's not ready to be mentally healthy and feel good about herself.

Your friend isn't either. But it seems she is attacking you in an effort to harm your self-esteem - which indicates hers if VERY low. She's nasty and picky? If you want to keep the friendship, I encourage you to talk to her about how you're feeling. Tell her that this friendship is important to you, but you only want healthy relationships in your life and the only way the friendship can truly continue to grow and thrive is for you both to build each other up and that you feel that she's kind of tearing you down.

Hopefully she'll hear what you say, take it to heart and change her nasty ways. Good Luck.

Answer 2

Hi, keep your head up! She sounds to be jealous to me you must be feeling pretty good about yourself lately and looking fine as hell so don't let her take that away from you and furthermore that's not how you treat a best friend so I would really question that.

If I were in your shoes I would step back from her a bit because if she is just going to make you feel bad about being who you are you shouldn't be around her. Maybe when you step back for awhile she will do some growing up so in the mean time keep your smile on and don't loose yourself over her.

Another suggestion is when your at work people that aren't your best friends and that are telling you such nice things about yourself those are the people that deserve your friendship so I would just chill with them.

Chow.

Answer 3

Okay, best friends do not put each other down. If for some reason your outfit was not working, best friends gently comment that it is not the best outfit they have seen you in only in response to your request for an opinion. Your friends sounds to me like a control freak. You sound insecure. So stop and get a hold of yourself. What other's think does not make or break a person. Be proud of yourself. Surround yourself with positive influences. Step away from the negative ones.

http://www.predator-awareness.com

Answer 4

I'd say you need to comfront her and let her know that what she's saying is bothering you and ask her what her reason's are behind it, it could be she's jealous and that's her way of making herself feel better. Is this picture here of you, girl your beautiful and I'd say it's your friend w/a problem. You could alway's turn the table's on her, for a week tell her she ain't looking so good, like what she's doing to you, then at the end of YOUR test, ask her how she feel's about what your saying and how you're treating her. Good luck....maybe she's not a real friend?

Answer 5

Hey, I have the same issue and first of all, don't let it get you down. She's picking at your clothes because you look fab and she feels jealous.

The area that people try to put you down reflects the area that they feel insecure about; if she is picking at your looks, it is because she feels ugly standing next to you!

If this person is close to you, talk to her. Pull her aside one day and just tell her that you don't appreciate the nasty comments because they hurt your feelings and friends shouldn't bring each other down, they should push each other up.

Otherwise, just cut her off. Let toxic people go.

Answer 6

sounds like your friend is jealous of you. and is having self esteem issues. when she says a negative comment about your looks make a point of coming back with a "well you look great today" or somthing positive, and sound sincere. maybe she hears you get complimented by everyone else and she doesnt so she is feeling down and left out... but try that for a while, it may boost her confidence and she will stop. you obviously know you look ok, by everyone elses comments. this will cost you nothing and hopefully help your friend

Answer 7

we have best friends for the soul purpose of lifting up our spirits when we are feeling down, that is the job of a best friend. Your friend it seems isn't doing her job, It is best to distance yourself from her at this point and time. If it turns out your friendship ends because of this you are better off.

Answer 8

Either have a heart to heart & figure out what's under her skin or ignore her because she's obviously feeling ugly & trying to make you feel the same way.

Answer 9

Maybe she is just jealous of you. Sorry to say but I don't consider her a good friends. Good friends do not keep putting you down.

Answer 10

then you tell her, if u were my friend best friend at that she would try and make you feel better about how you look. you dont need a friend like that, most girls in hs are insucure anyway and dont need the added stress of "Friend" people who pretend to be