Throughout my late teens, my dad had countless afairs and now i find it hard ot trust men. I broke up quite recently my partner of 3 years, partly due to me being jealous of him and not trusting him.
I never stopped him going out or anything, but I used to wonder what he was upto. To make matters worse, within a week of him leaving me he was seeing a girl form his work that he'd only met 2 weeks before he decided to end it.
How can I learn to trust men. Lads - you can help me out to if you want!
2007-03-26 20:29:51 · 6 answers · asked by Clarkey 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I know its really hard for you to trust people, but you can't let something that your father did affect your relationship because than you'll always miss out on a good thing. You've got to learn from mistakes. You can't just not trust someone because of what your dad did. You have to give people chances to prove themselves. Or you'll always end up getting hurt.
Good Luck
2007-03-26 21:18:33 · answer #1 · answered by heather c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
jealousy is a tough emotion to endure---and trusting is a quality that someone has to earn the right to keep. If you can't trust a man because of what someone else has done--you aren't being fair. To him or yourself. I can see why you are leary of men--just as many men do not trust a woman---that's a fact !!You better stop seeing the past--and look to the future as a new day to live. You're aware of the issues that infidelity can bring---cheaters have a problem that stems from a lack of self confidence and a need for acceptance and attraction. Not all people are like this.... if you find a self assured, self respecting man, work everyday at the relationship---rememebr that communications is the biggest part of the success. Let them earn your love and respect---but be fair.If you can't see this, maybe a counselor is in order. Good luck and relax--have fun and try to get past all the old life issues.
2007-03-27 03:41:44 · answer #2 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. You are only jealous because you were keep in the dark. My girlfriend deletes all txts straight away so i never see them. Talks to exboyfriends but only at work so I never know what they talk about and has lunch with one her ex's(yeah during working hours). If you know what they are doing and they are up front with everything then you dont worry. if they keep secrets then you worry.
You can trust some men just find the right one. Oh yeah its not just men women have affairs too.
2007-03-27 04:24:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be extremely jealous is very counterproductive to you. I was jealous when I was a teenager, now I just sort of go with the flow, because if you fear something so bad, it will come to pass. So just enjoy your next relationship and don't sabotage it with your jealousy, learn that if the person you are with does cheat on you, you'll know, you'll find out....and if that person is honest you may push them away...so just don't obsess as far as what they are doing when they are not with you. Be more confident, and believe in your instincts, don't give in to bad thoughts, that will just attract exactly what you fear.
2007-03-27 04:04:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what...after my first break up with my first love, I could not trust any men for like 15 years later, yes 15 years later ...that is when I met my husband. I have told him about my bad experience he understands.
2007-03-27 03:37:00 · answer #5 · answered by Ashley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
were you fun and happy and charming to be with? prolly he tried...you werent fun to be with. he found someone else.
you need to let go and have faith in a person. realizing its a waste of energy and is a main cause of breakups...you might be able to squealch it in the future. peace
2007-03-27 03:38:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋