I've been dating this guy for almost half a year now. He's separated. Well we had sex from the first month we went out. After 3 months of going out, he suddenly became cold. He still say that he loves me and makes time for me. My question... is it natural that the exitement wears off and it's settling? We're both adult...Or should i worry? HELP....
2007-03-26 17:53:39 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
yea, you should be worried, he is going through some drama in his divorce and he has stress
never get involved with someone who is involved, no matter what
2007-03-26 17:58:08 · answer #1 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be he's suffering from indecision. He's only separated from his wife, not divorced. If there are children involved, he may be torn about what he should do, how they would accept you knowing that mommy and daddy don't stay together anymore. He has a lot on his mind and it's best not to push it right now.
Don't worry, whatever you do because worry only brings strife. Let him take his time. After all, you are a fairly new addition to his life. He needs time to find the answers he's looking for. Try to be patient and understanding. It is okay, however, to ask him if he is doing alright. It may prompt him to talk with you. It could possibly be that he's frozen in time.
Try not to be too disappointed if he calls it off or stops seeing you at any time. Pushing for answers is the last thing you want to do. If he really loves you, he'll be there. But do keep your options open to see others as well. It's not a good idea to put all your eggs in one basket, as they say.
2007-03-27 01:05:04 · answer #2 · answered by chole_24 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seeing every situation is different and only you know yourself how truly well you know him after 18 months. If you live in separate places Id say that the distance after the first 3 months should tell you a little something
Id say you have to find out how you feel and if your questioning if he loves you and/or acting cold towards you for the last 15 months I think you already know the real answer. Adults carry lots of baggage with them especially ones that have been married before and/or there are children envolved
2007-03-27 01:02:29 · answer #3 · answered by keruptcorruption 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are quite correct. The 'newness' HAS worn off. But in your case, this is a little more than just that. You are a 'Rebound'.
I've been both the Rebound and the Reboundee. Contrary to what he might say, he DOES NOT love you. After his failed marriage, YOU are the one who made him feel like a man again. Which is a good thing, but... now both of your expectations are totally different. He doesn't see you the same way as he did in the beginning. Even if he doesn't realize it yet, he needs to move on and get on with his life & you yours.
Rebound relationships suck, and they NEVER last.
2007-03-27 01:50:49 · answer #4 · answered by Larry F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Few possibilities:
a. He might have been looking for a good time only
b. He is going through second thoughts
c. Initial eagerness has passed and he is finding things that bothers him
d. He might be in stress for some other reason.
In any case, talk to him about it. Keep your calm and let him express what is in his mind. If things do not turn out right, move on. He is not the only man around.
2007-03-27 01:11:50 · answer #5 · answered by Sean 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear one, I want you to know that this sounds to me like the gentleman in your life got what he wanted and moved on -- if not physically, then definitely mentally.
My wife and I have been married now for almost 14 years. Everything -- including the sex -- is better. She even looks sexier. Throughout all those years -- and I don't see how -- but my love has grown stronger for her.
That kind of love is possible for everyone. We just have to be willing to wait for the right one to come along.
2007-03-27 01:09:09 · answer #6 · answered by brevboy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is partially married, separated. You will encounter one man as separated and once divorced you will encounter another who very well may be much different than he was as a separated man...so much more will he feel once the divorce is final...and may not feel like being with just one women for the rest of his days...you should worry.
2007-03-27 01:00:53 · answer #7 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously still in love with the wife. Dating somebody separated is always a risk because they're in a state of transition.
2007-03-27 00:58:56 · answer #8 · answered by mhiaa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if its gone cold so fast, then i would think he is having cold feet. or it could be that he does not want to be burned again by a female.
good luck!
2007-03-27 00:57:43 · answer #9 · answered by ty808 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just move on if you are not sexually compatible. Maybe something is on his mind. Why don't you ask him if there is anything you could do to help. Or maybe its you ?
2007-03-27 00:57:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋