Why do children converse with invicible friends?

Question

My daughter is 6 yrs old.She used to play and chat with an invicible friend.Sometimes scolding loudly.She is an ordinary child like any other and quite brilliant with studies.I was intrigued by her behaviour.When I asked few of my friends,I found out sometimes their children also behave like this.Is it a sence of inadequency or sheer fantasy?Or do I have to consult a psychiatrist?

Answer 1

Having cared for many children during my lfie and also having stupied psychology and child development. I can assure you Fantasy is 100% normal in small children. Even many very creative children will continue to actively talk to friends that others can't see, up until around age 10. Buy age 5 or 6, they should be able to tell you that they know it's pretend.

A child who can't fantasize will often grown up rigid and will not deal with the hardships of life well.

Children who can fantasize often make friends more easily; they often have been social skills and they are able as they grow to explore the world more freely.

Most artistic people have very life fantasy life's as children. Being a painter in fact requires the artist to see it in their mind, which requires a type of fantasy skill.

You'll find that most inventors also were children who fantasized often as children and were even considered children as teens who often day-dreamed. All day-dreaming is, is how older children and adults often fantasize once they learn that it's not going to be acceptable to talk to imaginary friends.

The only time Fantasy in childhood is a problem, is when the child has a pretend friend that tells them to harm themselves or others. Then if you talk to them about the difference between pretend and real, allowable and not allowable and they continue to say something like, "Amy (pretend friend) says that I should hurt you." Things like that.

Children will blame the fantasy friend for things they themselves did wrong. They are testing the limites of the pretend and real; this is normal especially in children who have a pretend friend, but you remind them that they are responsible for what the pretend friend does. So if 'so and so' says to not listen to Mommy, they are still the one who will be in trouble if they do not listen to Mommy.

Children who are abused often have pretend friends as a way of coping with abuse. Sometimes they talk about hte abuse as having happened to the friend, it makes it easier and any good Psychologist would allow this as they help the child first talk about it, then understand it reallyi happened to them, not the pretend friend. but they would not say, "It happened to you, stop saying it happened to Sally, you and I know Sally isn't real."

You only go to a therapist when the child is near school age and can't tell the difference between pretending and real. You go if the child's pretend friend is being used continually to blame the pretend friend for their acting out and you've worked over several months to teach them that they are responsibel and will be disciplined for what the pretend friend does or tells them to do. You go to a therapist if your child only begins pretending after being abused and refuses to talk about the abuse and admit it was they who were abused, not he pretend friend.

Inadequency is a learned behavior and a child can't even relate to that type of thing until they are around eight. They can feel sad; they can be afriad, but inadequency takes a type of self judgement that even an abused child can't place upon themselves, that is something older children learn and adults.

I find that if you learn to pretend with your child, it becomes a fun game they involve you in. My friends children who live upstairs from me love pretend, especially her daughter and it's fine and it's a fun way for her to express herself. So try thinking of it from the child's point of view, as a game, as a way of exploring their world. Think how complex this world is to a child. So being able to work out conflicts, fears, things they do not understand in the world with a pretend friends, helps them, not harm them.

Try talking to her about her pretend friends, pretend worlds. You may learn alot about her and she'll let you into her pretend if you show her it's safe with you to pretend.

Your child sounds very normal, take it easy and don't stress out over it.

Answer 2

Children grow and learn and develop very quickly. At 6 years old your daughter is learning how to internalize her thought processes, but she's not there quite yet. Up until now she has shared everything that passes through her mind with you. Now you may notice that she is learning what it means to keep secrets. She is developing an inner dialogue.

This is a major step in the development of her brain. She is growing fast and she needs to bounce her ideas around a lot. Having an imaginary friend is a sign that she doesn't always have somebody else to share her thoughts and feelings with, such as friends, siblings, or parents. So she uses her experience of what she understands other people to be like to create a sounding board for herself. I would say this is probably a very good sign that your daughter is developing a healthy mental state, but if it is happening all the time then you should try to find more ways for her to connect with real people, since the imaginary friend is just a substitute.

She scolds and is loud because she is asserting herself as the dominant person in a fantsay relationship, and these things are a big part of what seems powerful and dominant to a 6 year old. You will hear your own words and discipline being reflected back at you in some funny and maybe even disturbing ways, but you can use this to help you understand better what your daughter's perception of things is, and it can help you learn to reach her and communicate with her in ways that are effective and make you both feel good.

If I were in your position I would talk to her about the words and tone she uses with her imaginary friend and you will learn a lot about how your daughter feels now that she is not sharing all her thoughts with you unselfconsciously.

Answer 3

I say its normal and healthy for a child to have an imaginary friend. It proves that your child has a wide imagination and with its help, she could take a risk and achieve success later in life. With such a vivid imagination, who can say she can't make her dreams come true. Remember, you've said she's brilliant in studies.

Answer 4

Alot of the time it's a healthy fantasy kids have.You know how most kids have imaginations! Sometimes, a lot kids who are only children have a tendency to have them much more. It is quite normal in many cases. :)

Answer 5

Children do this when they are lonely or don't have someone they can trust or play with. My advice you should involve your daughter in different activities, what ever it is that she likes take her out to places where she can interact with other children her age and learn how to socialize with other kids. That is a very important face in your daughters life, so make sure that she learns how to socialize with other kids, share, and play.....

--Jay

Answer 6

i might lie and tell your pal their toddler is attractive. they could on no account capture you in a lie, on the grounds that elegance is "in the attention of the beholder". does not harm you to lie in this manner and does not harm the toddler or the mummy the two. Win, win win... the only rationalization why you does not say the toddler is attractive and enable the mummy experience good approximately herself is that in case you felt insecure in some way and felt to you had to coach her you're greater effectual than her in this manner (i.e. you have alluring infants and he or she does not). if so, you would be the only desiring help. in basic terms take the extreme street and lie.

Answer 7

When I was younger I had imaginary friends as well. I would talk and play. My parents didn't take to it very well. They freaked out and took me to doctors.

Nothing was wrong with me.

Of course your child could be speaking with dead relatives.

Answer 8

Kids just playing ! Lighten up! They got imagination and are dreamers. Dont ever shut up a dreamer.

Answer 9

its perfectly normal
shes probably just lonely
maybe invite a friend or family member her age over?
hope that helped =]]

Answer 10

this is normal,she is using her imagination which is good,she will eventually out grow it as she matures and makes friends in school.