ok i hate my older sis, she hates me. she's twenty five and divorced. the problem comes now that she's driving a wedge between me and my dad. he constantly thinks that there is still good in her, even though she's done nothing but screw up in everyhting for the past foru years. i'm a senior in highschool and was wondering if i was right to baskiclly ask my dad to make a choice between my sis and me
2007-03-26 17:39:03 · 7 answers · asked by vincent, the lord of chaos 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i dont live at home already, i go to a boarding school four hours away and she lives just 15 minutes away so needless to say she can talk to him far easier then i can anyway.
2007-03-27 03:55:10 · update #1
i've tried talking to my dad, which isnt often because of how far away i live, going to a boarding school and all, but wehn ever i do bring up the conversationg it's always to same result "SHUT UP SCOTT". i've tried to talk to her, but the thing is that shes been the only major problem in my family for three years. i know that i should talk to her, but every time we do its allways the same. she wants my dads help to keep her kids through the divorce and otherstuffe befor the divorce and well she gives me this guilt trip about her kids, but still seems to forget that this is my last years to live at home and have the father son relationship.
2007-03-29 17:25:49 · update #2
it would be unfair to make your day have to choose, you are both his children and he should not be put in this type of position, you and your sister are adults who have to work your problems out on your own, both of you are going through tension in your lives, maybe if you two sit down and try to communicate with each other in a where the both of you can get your feelings out and listen to the other with any judgments or interrupting and try to understand the other person maybe you guys can get somewhere....
2007-03-29 15:44:01 · answer #1 · answered by MidnightSkies 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is absolutely not right for you to ask your dad to choose between the two of you. He is your father AND he is her father. That does not mean the two of you have to like each other; and you may just be each other's greatest nemesis. You mentioned your dad still seeing some good in her. Okay, basically that means that he hasn't and is not going to give up on her. He is her father, that is pretty much his job. How exactly is she driving this wedge between you and your father and what is the wedge? Remember, it is not your place to judge because we will all be judged eventually. The best advice I can give is for you to talk to your father. OPEN UP. I know, its so hard for you guys (in general). But seriously, you gotta drop the tough guy act and tell him how this crap with your sister is making you feel. I know you have feelings, or you wouldn't be here asking for advice. So go, now, ASAP and talk. The sooner you do, the sooner you will start to feel better about this.
2007-03-27 01:10:53 · answer #2 · answered by mlove1307 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
instead of hating her so much, try another approach. my sister is eight years older than me and i have always been the one to pick up her pieces all my life and it always seemed to she got the benefit of the doubt before me. for a long time i hated her for it, many years i didn't talk to her. try to, as difficult as it may be, try to forget your anger and see things through her eyes. why would this person who is supposed to love you done nothing but betray you. what could she be facing in her life to do these things. think long and hard about it. don't make things worse with your father, because even though you have every right, i promise your gonna look like the asshole. distance yourself from your sister and give her time to straighten out and when she's ready be there for her. in the end when all your old friends have moved away your family will always be there. today my sister is sober and doing great and she is my best friend. hope you say the same one day. wish you all the best.
2007-03-27 01:08:43 · answer #3 · answered by SW 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should say you hate your sister ways not your sister. No don't ask your dad to choose. It doesn't make any difference if your sister is 50 years old she will still be one of his kids and so will you. Maybe he feels that your sister is needing more of his attention right now. Also maybe you are just a little jealous of the attention he is giving her. Give them some space to work things out if you confront this it will just make things worse for your dad and all involved. I am sure he loves both of you and there will be time for things later. Also if you are a senior in high school it is time for you to start being your own man. Good luck.
2007-03-27 00:58:24 · answer #4 · answered by edj009 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can ask, but you will look like a butt head. Why would a partent chose one child over another. He is going to love you both no matter what, as he should.
2007-03-27 00:50:52 · answer #5 · answered by my_thoughts 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi cool ya. this is not a problem of you and your sister. your older sister is already have divorced so she is having some tension. so dont disturb to your sister. please under stand you sister fealings. so co-operate your sister and father also ok.
2007-03-27 01:12:46 · answer #6 · answered by Rajkumar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think you should of put your dad in that situation, but you should tell him how you feel
2007-03-27 00:46:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋