If you were in charge of picking ABC's next male candidate for "The Bachelor", would would you like to see having 25 stupid tittering little air-headed women ogling over?
With that idea in mind, I want you (in your best ABC announcer voice) to introduce the newest bachelor to the world. Describe his looks, his career, his finances, etc. Be as creative as possible. If you choose to be funny (and I hope some of you will) don't forget to play-up his overwhelming body odor issue and his addiction to twinkies and beer....etc.
2007-03-26 16:31:45 · 7 answers · asked by Mooch 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Actually, you have a great idea here.
I have long felt the bravest people on this earth are those who get up every day and go to work, on time.
Wouldn't it be wonderful to applaud men who in their everyday life, go to work, volunteer in their community to make it a little better place for all of us to live, go to plays or take part in sports to keep their minds and bodies productive.
Setting the serious aspect aside ~~~ here's my tail. (sic~ on purpose)
..................................................................
Ladies and gentlemen ~~~ it is my privilege to introduce our next bachelor ~~~
"mini the Moocher" Mooch is four feet tall, a short stop for the "Tulsa Twinkies" and the winner of this year's "Cream Puff Award" for catching a grounder with his bare left hand, no matter he dropped it while switching the ball to his right hand in hopes of throwing it to the 1st baseman. We all know Mooch gets a little excited when touching strange balls. (He is only familiar with his own).
2007-03-26 18:02:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
this time on The Bachelor !
tall ,dark and gasy who is a former classical singer who is a funny guy who was once in rehab for an addiction to twinkies . is looking for his dream girl and prays she does not blow up ! although he does have major odor issues with a case of old spice he will be just fine . his name is josh and he is Hot !!!!!!!. He admit's he has been in love before once but that was only to chocolate and still claims his love to twinkies .his finance's is good has a nice house in the south (his Gas was so bad the goverment made him move to the south were it's o.k to have natural Gas !) josh is looking for the love of his life ! so if you like twinkies and free natural gas you are gonna love josh !
God Bless !,Heather
2007-03-26 16:52:26 · answer #2 · answered by must_love_dogs_and_me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Introducing the newest bachelor Sam the Salvage man, he's all of 5'2" and healthy 335lbs. He's got a comb over that will drive women wild, his business is booming, he's only down $235,000.00, at the rate he's going she should be out of debt by the time he's 97 years old. He has a unique smile, from chewing all that tobacco, one that your sure to remember. He has major investments in EAU de motor oil cologne, bad a** belching beer and the out dated supply of Spam. Ladies you know you want him, got to have him and intend to keep him.
2007-03-26 16:45:10 · answer #3 · answered by sharpeilvr 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-23 18:18:55 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Good evening ladies and gentlemen. My name is Keith Jackson. I usually am a sports commentator at college football games but this evening I am honored to be the master of ceremonies at this most auspicious event. Tonight is the night that "The Bachelor" is chosen. Yes....the night is finally here. Are you ready America? Are you ready, world?!"
(Drum roll....^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^)
"And it'sssssssssssssssssssss........MARSHAL MATT DILLON!!!!!!!!"
(Women are screaming uncontrollably. Even a few men are,actually.)
"Matt is a 35 year old U.S. Marshal of Dodge City,Kansas. He is 6'6" in one leg,6'7" in the other. A bit strange but hey! Who really cares? Right ladies?!!"
(More female screeches can be heard.)
"Man! This reminds me of when the Beatles were performing!!
Anyway.....here's a little more info on our winning bachelor. He has brown hair with just a HINT of a curl. The bluest eyes you'd EVER want to see. His paycheck is skimpy and he'll most likely live his days out in the dusty old town of Dodge....sleeping in a little old cot in his office."
(Just then SUNSHINE rushes the stage)
"Wait a minute! What's this?! A lady from the audience has climbed up on stage and is grabbing Matt!! SECURITY!!!"
Sunshine latches on to the man she has been in love with since she was a wee child, all the while kicking the security guards away like a wild *** banchee!!! Man smiles and plants a big,juicy kiss right on Sunshine's lips!!
"Maam? I say,maam? Have you anything to say for yourself??"
Sunshine smiles at Matt,leans into the mic and yells out.......
"WHOAAAAA NELLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY !!!!"
Keith Jackson: "Hey?! That's MY line!!!!!!!!"
2007-03-26 17:17:04 · answer #5 · answered by I am Sunshine 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
[announcer voice] this is bob Jacob
he's 5'9 with a hot bod and sizzling persona.
he works on his fathers farm and is good with animals.
he's looking for that special someone that can milk his cow if you get my drift.
2007-03-26 16:37:48 · answer #6 · answered by experiMENTAL bunny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fox already did something like that. It was called "Joe Millionaire"
2007-03-26 16:44:39 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋