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If you want details, see my other question....

Here's the SUMMARY
So, my friend has these double standards, I have an example in my previous question, but I don't think she realizes it. She's an only child, and a born leader. She takes charge of everything, in a good way, but doesn't like being told when she's wrong. She's brilliant, and a way awesome friend, but I don't know how to tell her about her double standards. A short example:

EXAMPLE
the friend metioned above, insults (in a teasing way) my other friend's music, but is irritated when my other friend insults (in the exact same teasing way) her music.

QUESTION
What do I do, and how do I tell her, or end her double standards? Please help, I can tell, she doesn't realize about her double standards.

**PS: I can't tell her straight out, I'm not that kind of person...

2007-03-26 15:07:19 · 5 answers · asked by Crappy Haircut Girl 6 in Family & Relationships Friends

5 answers

You may say that you are not the kind of person to tell her straight out but you summed it up pretty well in your question. That's the way you can complain about her double standards when she makes a particularly bad comment about something that she is sensitive about herself. Speak up and say, 'How can you say that when you yourself don't like it when someone teases you about your tastes in music?' Don't make a big accusing deal out of it - just ask her and see what she says. After that happens in a few situations, she will 'catch' herself using double standards. Maybe she will never change but your talking to her will have left an impression. Then you can't say you didn't try.

2007-04-02 02:41:24 · answer #1 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0 0

If you aren't going to tell her straight out then just casually mention to her that others would see that type of behavior as annoying and immature. She probably doesn't realize the double standards she is using since she isn't use to having everything "fair" when sharing toys with siblings, ect.

2007-03-27 14:15:05 · answer #2 · answered by girlshadow212 4 · 1 0

generally people joke, but cant take a joke. I think its best to give subtle hints, make up a story about a friend or a friend's friend who is just like that, maybe she will get the hint, however, if she still persists, maybe u could tell her to take light (just to defuse the situation). then later refer to it & tell her that she needs to get as good as she gives (cant clap with one hand, so to speak).

2007-04-03 14:48:35 · answer #3 · answered by atts 3 · 0 0

Tell her to leave the insults out of it, be constructive. Also, if you can't take it don't dish it out. You reap what you sow.

2007-04-03 14:21:57 · answer #4 · answered by Dak Aloysius 2 · 0 0

your going to meet people like that ALL your life trust me, so you either put up with it or dont hang out with her anymore

2007-04-03 10:34:45 · answer #5 · answered by Newtron 2 · 0 0

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