me and my x split up about 4/5 years ago i still think the world of her, we still see each other alot around 4 days a week. we both have had relasonships over this time. but mine just don't work out because i still think about her and it gets in the way. i did'nt tell her how i felt but i tourtht it was very clear that i still liked her very much. anyway the prob is that she is now going out with my best mate and i am finding it very hard to cope with. when she comes around my house and he follows her, i feel that they are rubbing my nose in it and get very jealous when i see them playing around and flirting with each other, now i'm not talking to them. i know that it is nothing to do with me what she dose in her life but it still hurts very much. and i'm sure he knew that i still love her very much, i never told any of my mate how i feel about her but they all seemed to know what i thing of her. so am i right or wrong in the way i feel? and what would you do now?
2007-03-26 15:00:04 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You can't control your feelings, and you have a right to them. At the same time you can't expect people to know what you are thinking without telling them.
I would sit down with your ex and your friend and let them know that it makes you uncomfortable when you are all together. You don't have to say you are still in love with your ex or anything else--just tell them you feel uncomfortable and if they persist in asking tell them you are having feelings from the situation that you would prefer not to try to describe, but that you wish they would respect.
In any case it should help. They (if they respect your wishes) should stop coming around together, and your ex will have a more clear vision of your feelings, as will your friend. It may lead to a reconciliation later, or at the very least will allow everyone to take stock of what each relationship means to them.
2007-03-26 15:06:06 · answer #1 · answered by LaNell the Relationship Expert 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi there, It is perfectly understandable how you are feeling, and you are not wrong to be reacting in this way. Let both your ex and your friend know how you feel. Tell them that you simply cannot be around them for the reasons you have stated. Because you finished with your ex 4/5 years ago, and you have been good friends ever since breaking up; they may be assuming that you have got over it and would be ok about them having a relationship. They both may not realise that they are hurting you. It is best that you let them know how you are feeling. If you cant tell them to their face, at least write them both a note. Get it out in the open so everyone is aware of the situation. I wish you all the best! :o)
2007-03-26 23:51:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let them get on with it and start anew. It is a bit like the buses!! A new one will be along soon! Good luck!
2007-03-26 22:07:09 · answer #3 · answered by R.E.M.E. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
damb i feel 4 ya man an id be exactly the same but try not to lose 2 "gd m8s" over it
2007-03-26 22:11:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've been with her and it didn't work out. Time to forget and move on. It's hard but you have to move on. She has and I don't think she would appreciate if you told her how you feel.
2007-03-27 09:09:15 · answer #5 · answered by buzybee 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Explain but also try to move on.
She has. But should also know about the effect on you and how you wouldn't do the same back.
2007-03-26 22:25:18 · answer #6 · answered by jinz 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to be direct with her. You need to tell her how you really feel about her...everything that you stated in your question.
You can't blame either one of them because you haven't made your feelings clear.
2007-03-26 22:04:35 · answer #7 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to let go and move on with your life. She has.
2007-03-26 22:06:28 · answer #8 · answered by Andrea G 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont know why your holding the bird in the cage,open the door and let her go.and well done to your mate for getting up her
2007-03-26 22:08:51 · answer #9 · answered by gary r 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋