Unwed mothers and childsupport !What do you rhink?

Question

Tell me what you all think about this. Why is ok for a women to determine if a man should have to pay child support? A man and a women have sex at the age of 20 , she is suppose to be on birthcontrol the girl gets pregnet they are young so the guy offers to pay for abortion she says no. Well they go separate ways (by the way no relationship involved just sex) seven years later the man moves on to get married and have a family well he gets letter in the mail for a demand of childsupport! Well if you are married and have kids yes I can understand he is reliable but what gives the female rights to take control of the rest of the males life (money) she is just as wrong as him ,she made the decision to raise the child, I feel they are giving way to much control to unwed mothers . The thing is she now has 3 kids by 3 different dads and still not married! If they would make these mothers raise these children they choose to have they would quit having them it is not fair to the kids.

Answer 1

Ultimately it is society, via the courts, that decides that the "father" pays. Righ or wrong, society decided it is mor beneficial for the child to be "raised" by a parent or parents rather than the government.
All these people who say the man should have kept his pants on are just silly. Unless this woman was raped, she could just as easily said no. She apparently also lied about the birth control. She was also offered another option but declined. In this instance, the woman sounds like a money grubbing w.... I she gets married, the payments from the fathers stop. She'll never marry. She's riding the gravy train.

Answer 2

when it comes down to it every parent should be held responsible and pay child support to help raise the child, this means money that will be used for the childs needs. if it cannot be proven the mother or father (whoever be the guardian of the child is using the moeny for the childs needs , then the man/woman should pay in other ways, buy purchasing items and clothing for the child instead of giving money!

meaning that being a single un wed mother has nothing to do with the situation!!! its about the child being taken care of financially!!! regardless of the situation!!!

like hello lets just all discriminate against women who are unwed and fall pregnant and decide have a baby!

Answer 3

Why is birth control only the woman's responsibility? If the male had used a condom instead of leaving it to the woman he wouldn't be having this problem. Some women don't believe in abortion, and that is their right. Also, sometimes birth control fails. It's NOT 100%. That's why doctors say BOTH party's should use birth control in the first place. You don't want to pay child support? Either wrap it, or keep it in your pants until you're married and DO want to have kids.

Answer 4

well if the best thing to do here is to not have sex at all....all men keep it in their pants, and all girls need to keep their legs closed.

If you choose to have sex and you choose to believe that teh girl or girls you are having sex with are on BC. Then by you own actions and choices as well as hers.....if she gets pregnant and if the child is yours, then you pay if asked, but only once paternity has been established. It takes 2 to make a baby, and I guess that she choose not to say anything because she was afraid, so you just found out now that you are the father of a 7 yr old....Everone needs to remember that if you do not want children while you are teens and are unwed. Then you need to keep your johnson put away, and don't believe the girl just because she says she is on BC pills....she may be, but what many ppl do not know is that medications can interfere with the pill...and if you take large doses of vitamin C as well as other type of vitamins and herbs.....well you might as well stop taking BC pill....because it is just like you have not even taken BC pill when you mix it with some other meds.......and it is not always up to the girls to make sure we are protected.....you little boys share that responsibility in that to....So accept the fact that you or whoever has a child, and because you chose to have sex.....you also chose to have a child.

Answer 5

Sounds to me like he should've been paying child support for seven extra years. He did know about the baby afterall. If he didn't want to take the chance of having kids he shouldn't have had sex at all. She very well could've been on birthcontrol.It's not 100% effective. I have 2 kids that prove that. By the way don't you think that she had to have been raising the kid for 7 years by herself because the "father" wasn't taking his responsibilities seriously? The fact that he wasn't doing anything to help raise them is what's really unfair. I'm sorry but this really irritates me. When the new woman comes along and doens't want to give up money so that their spouses kids can be taken care of they show who is really after the money. And I don't think it has anything to do with them not being married when they had the kid. It has to do with women not wanting to deal with another womans kids. That is so disgustingly selfish in my opinion. Sounds like everyone involved needs to grow up and put this child first instead of worrying about everything else.

Answer 6

Child support does share the burden of raising the child. If the father avoids his child support duty, he is avoiding responsibility completely. Child support is intended to ensure that both parents share in the financial cost of raising the child. This says nothing of the many other obligations associated with raising a child. If you think that paying child support in any way compares to the duties of the custodial parent, you are sadly mistaken. Additionally, you say that years have passed, who supported the child during the interim? Both people are responsible for bringing the child into the world and the child should suffer as little as possible from the parents irresponsible actions.

Answer 7

OK, so she's not very good at making decisions, birth control or staying committed to one man, but all of that HAS NOTHING to do with the man. It's his kid and he should pay the child support. In fact, I look down upon men who create kids and then just walk away, no thoughts of how that child is being cared for, loved, raised, cherished...NOTHING, how selfish and UNmanly of him. AND now he's finally ready to settle down and 'have a family' and he's being inconvenienced by his child he created years ago and just thought he could ignore? What sane woman would want to marry and raise kids with such a selfish loser?

Answer 8

it is not fair to the kids, but then again, it should also be the mans responsibility to use protection, no matter what a woman says, its like sticking your hand into the fire and hen claiming the wood is at fault for burning and therefore hurting him

if he had half a brain then he would have used a rubber no matter what, since he didn't care much then he is not much of a victim either

a man can't tell a woman to get an abortion same as a woman can't tell a man to get a vasectomy, but once the man decides to engage in sex with a woman then is he not responsible for what he does and what his body does? is it not the man that actually plants the seed in a woman? its like a farmer planting a field of corn and then suing his neighbor because he has to pay for the fertalizer to keep the corn growing like its someone elses fault

if he was man enough to play then he should be man enough to pay, thats it

Answer 9

Well, I do think that men deserve a choice. I do think that they should be able to sign away all rights of being a father and have a sort of figurative abortion. If the woman still chooses to have a child, she chooses to be a single mom.

I do not agree with, "you play. you pay" and other bull **** because I'm pro-choice and understand sex without the intent to procreate.

EDIT: Of course one could argue that abortion is the feminine responsiblity and the possibility that a woman won't make the proper choice is the man's burden.

Answer 10

Allow me to say this...I don't believe in child support, HOWEVER I do believe this:
If a woman chooses to keep her child then she should do so and the man that laid in bed with her should help her raise that child. He should do this without child support. So if that man went away and didn't talk to that woman for seven years then he got what he deserved! All I'm saying is regardless of everything a man and woman should both care for their child! He was wrong for saying it was just sex. Once a child is created it isn't just sex and a woman shouldn't have to have an abortion. He should be able to care for his child and still have his own life. Once he fails to do so then you know what? I can't blame a woman for getting the government involved!