Am I a bad mother if I let my daughter have sex at 11 years old?

Question

I lost my virginity when I was 11. I turned out fine and I don't have any regrets.

Answer 1

Omg! Sorry, but I think I have to say yes. At 11, your daughter is NOT ready to be doing something that big! Seriously, I can't belive anyone would think that's ok!

Well, I don't know if you're a good mother or not, but it's not responsible of you to allow this!

You're daughter isn't mature enough yet. If you allow her to do this, there could be all sorts of problems and complications. Like pregnancy! (That's assuming, of course, that she has even had her period, which if she's 11, I don't know if she has.) Also, there's so many diseases she could get! Are you willing to risk your daughters health? She's SO young!

If she's already had sex (which I guess she has if you're posting this) you need to take her to the doctor ASAP to check for any of the problems I mentioned before. And please explain to her that she is far too young to be engaging in such risky behavoir!

This is coming from a 15 year old girl. Trust me when I say that not all kids are having sex at such a young age. And those that are are in serious danger of a lot of serious problems. Good luck with your daughter!

Answer 2

I really don't want to call you a bad mother, but what your letting her do is kind of bad. Just because you turned out fine doesn't mean she will. Many teens who have sex at a young age grow up to be prostitutes. And by doing this she can get STDs, Herpies, AIDS, and other harmful sexeualy transmitted diseases. I would rather my daughter (if I had one) grow up and loose her virginity to someone she loves than to a guy at the age of 11 and have a long and healthy life than die at the age of 12 because of a disease she caught and I really would not want to become a grandmother until i was old.Your not a bad mother, but your not the mother who makes the best decisions. Change your decision and explain to her why you did it and then maybe I will rethink my opinion. Hope that helped

Answer 3

If you have to ask, then in your heart youalready know the answer. Bad may not be a harsh enough adjective. How about inadequit, irresponsible, unqualified. I can't think of more now, but give me a minute.
I am sorry to read that you were raped or molested or abused when you were 11. It is good to know that you have dealt with it, in a way, and that you are able to live and function in society.
However, it is obvious by your question that your trauma has corrupted your thinking. So, let me just tell you this, in this society children having sexual intercourse is frowned upon. Because, many people believe that children are not prepare physically or mentally for sex and everything else that goes along with sex (STD's, pregnancy, etc.).

Answer 4

The majority of people in western countries would tell you that it is far too young to start having sexual intercourse and that they should wait until around 15-16 or even older. Certainly children know more about sex earlier than we did 15 years or more ago. Sure, some children experiment at young ages and I knew a number of children in the 1950's where I lived who had sex before they were 12, some were even as young as 10, but it does not make it right.
In some countries girls are married off as young as 9 y.o. (at or around the start of their periods, and sometimes about a year before) and are expected to have sex with their husbands and are pregnant by the time they are 11, and they later suffer from fistulas (unsure of spelling) where their bladder wall and uterine wall are torn causing the girls to be constantly dripping putrid urine.

I say a child should not have any form of sex until a minimum of 15.

Answer 5

I lost my virginity when I was 15 but not because my mother ever said it was a good idea. I really think sex is something that you become ready for when you are ready. 11 is way to young. So is 12, so is 13. I would put any girl in therapy if she lost her virginity before 15 or wanted to. That's 6th grade! The kid most likely doesn't have her period, or any life experiences that could help her make that choice. If you allow your daughter to have sex at 11, or encourage her to, that is wrong and I would report you. Also, what boy her age is ready to have sex? Boys don't become physically ready as early as girls do and anyway, it's wrong. 11 years old is way way way way to young for sex.

Are you a prostitute or something?

Answer 6

Yes, you are a bad mother. You arent fine, you have a daughter and at 11 think its ok for her to have sex. What planet did you come from. This is so said. Ever heard of AIDS? Hows the name Grandma sound to you?

Answer 7

What do you think?

Why let her go through with the same mistake that you made at her age? Plus there's alot more to be concerned about today then when you were younger (STDs, internet stalkers/predators). I realize you can't rewind the past for either of you, but if you really want to make an improvement, I'd put a serious stop to this routine after explaining to her why it's not right. Sometimes a structure (such as religion) can help tremendously in moments like this. If you don't belong to a church,maybe you two should look into it.

Answer 8

As parents we want the best for our children and want them to be able to do the things we did not or could not do.

When it comes to sex children these days are doing it so young and are so uneducated as to the consequences of their actions.

Bottom line is none of us knows your daughter and there really isnt any way to stop your daughter from having sex behind your back.

All you can do is try to educate her and let her know the pros and cons of having sex at such a young age. At 11 there really arent many pros just all cons!

Please do not promote your 11 year old baby to have sex as that is fairly unfit and just unjust but teach her what she needs to know about diesases and babies to help her make the right decision of the matter.


Your not a bad mother unless you are promoting or pushing her to have sex. She will do it regardless of what you think or say just as you did!

Answer 9

I dare not call u a bad mother.I have a 12yr old that has been having a period 4 2 months now.I dare not give her the impression that to have sex is o.k. at this point in life!!!! To me it's not o.k.You should sit down and think extremely hard by yourself about your psychological affects from your encounter at 11yrs old.This may hurt you but you have to want more 4 your daughter in this life.I would like 2 apologize 4 it happening 2 you at 11yrs old. It IS NOT YOUR FAULT! I think that you should seek some help to talk 2 someone professional.

Answer 10

As a father I can't imagine letting my little girl have sex at age 11, I am not going to judge you because I know judgment is for God and as a Minister it's not my job to pass judgment. However I will say this, It's irresponsible parenting to allow a child of yours to engage in sexual activity any way shape or form until they are old enough and can make sound judgments of their own. Sex was meant for marriage and because you made mistakes, your allowing your daughter to make mistakes, if you drank and drive at 16 would that make it ok for your child doing the same. I would hope not, but that seems to be your logic. Is this how you want to train up your daughter?