my friend wants to have a baby and she is only 15. she knows she cant have one because of her parents but she wants to have a baby so much and she loves kids. i dont know what to tell her. please help me. she really wants to have one and i dont think its right.
2007-03-26 12:53:23 · 51 answers · asked by Naomi 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
YES!!!
1) Where's the financial resources? If you can't live without your parents, you can't afford a baby.
2) Physically--your body is still growing. You aren't ready to have a baby.
Loving kids and being a parent are two VERY different things. I love my son, but during those first few months it was terrible!
Tell her to get a clue. Being a parent is TOUGH. It requires immense, emotional, physical, and financial support.
Tell her to get through college, get married, and THEN think about having children. She's 15. She's going to have PLENTY of time.
2007-03-26 12:57:28 · answer #1 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
When I was in high school, my best friend told me that when she turned 18, she wanted to start having kids right away. This is an akward situation. You're friend may love kids, but she's never had to parent one. And parenting is alot different from just babysitting for someone. She needs to realize that she is just a baby herself, and that being young is something that doesn't last forever and never comes back once it's gone. She should instead be focusing on school, friends, hanging out, what kids do. Having a baby is reserved for a couple who are in a committed (not just serious) relationship, and have talked it over more than once.
Tell her that instead of rushing into it, that she should instead prepare for a family of her own by getting through school, getting a degree, and starting a career so she will have a good paying job to support the children and give them a good life. Tell her to think of her children instead of herself. Try this. I told my friend the exact same thing and it worked.
2007-03-26 15:18:37 · answer #2 · answered by JustCallMeTina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a difference between loving kids and having one yourself. You cant ignore them if they wake up in the middle of the night. You cant send them back home when you get sick, or tired, or want to go out with your friends. 15 is still a child-and you have to be able to think about what the baby's needs and wants are before you think of your own. Babysitting is not practice for mothering. Ask your friend if she's ready to move out, get a job, pay for diapers, formula, clothes, doctor visits, to give up hanging out with friends, going to dances, going to parties, and gaining weight. If she cant handle that then there is no way she could handle a baby.
It's really selfish to have a kid just because you want to piss off your parents- where does that leave the kid?
If she gets pregnant, she probably wont even finish school- so she'll be yet another uneducated teen mom on welfare with starving dirty babies and not a man in sight.
2007-03-26 13:10:26 · answer #3 · answered by heather 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
At 15 her body is still growing. If she gets pregnant, the unborn baby will be fighting with the mother's body for nutrients. This increases the risk of malnutrition in the child. At the very least this can lead to an underweight child who must remain at the hospital for an extended period. It also raises the risk of cleft lip, cleft palate, and blindness.
Since your friend is not yet fully grown, she would increaase the risk of complications such as high blood pressure and pre-enclampsia. Also, she will have a greater risk of requiring a forceps or Cesarean delivery.
Physically, the best age for a woman to become pregnant is in her 20s. If she really wants a child to love she'll do what's best for the child and wait.
2007-03-26 13:07:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to watch Maury Povich...seriously though...YES, 15 is a very young age to have a baby. She is still a baby herself! Tell her to take care of a baby for just one night...a newborn baby for one entire night and she will change her mind. It is not all cuddles and coos...It is 2 hour feedings ALL THE TIME when they are first born and poopy diapers, and not just any poo...the worst smelling and looking poo you can imagine! Not just that...you have your spit up moments, and just hope the baby does not have colic cause that is a whole different ball of wax!! Just have your school guidance counselor talk to her if you can't get through but, a baby is something that you want to wait until you are financially stable and can support yourself as well as another life...not to mention that she has not lived and had her fun yet. If she were to have a baby she would have NO time for herself! It would be all about someone else! Forget going out with your friends...you have a baby. Forget movies and shopping and all that other "hang-out" stuff! It's all about that little baby! Oh Lord...someone help me!! I will be here all night preaching! Just tell her to think about how she will give that baby everything it deserves to have! Is she going to be on welfare? Does she want her baby to have the best that it could have? Or does she want her baby to want for everything?
My Mother was 15 when she got pregnant with me and 16 when she had me and I AM glad that I am here but, there were many many times that I wished I were born to someone older and more stable. Everything did work out for her in the end...she had more children later...one when I was 12 and another when I was 15...I had to take care of them a lot...my sisters got everything that I wanted when I was young but could not have because my Mother was not financially stable then! Even things like braces...there was no money when I needed them but, later, after she went to college, there was money for the 2 younger ones to have them. Just think about the BIG picture!!! Tell her not to be selfish!!
2007-03-26 13:07:00 · answer #5 · answered by Ridiculous 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ur right. 15 is way to young to have a kid. my friends cousin was 13 and had a baby and her mom cried all the time because they didnt have enough money for the baby so they had to give it away. there could be all kinds of complications. the baby could die, be premature, have birth defects. the dad would most likely bail out and she'd end up being a single mother. also, she'd pretty much be throwung away her life. some of her friends might disown her cause they would probaly be embaressed. and being a teenage parent is really hard. you have to juggle school, the baby, and possibly a job.
2007-03-26 13:04:07 · answer #6 · answered by kendy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
15 is extremely young to have a baby. There are many many other things that need to come in life before a baby. At the age of 15, you can't support yourself ( monetarily or emotionally) so bringing a child into the picture obviously going to compound the problem.
2007-03-26 12:58:06 · answer #7 · answered by jhairumeee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes! it is very wrong. i also was in a situation kind of like yours like a few months ago... okay your friend does not realize that having a baby is hard work.. first when she gets pregnant this will change the rest of her life try telling her the following.....
1) she will have to stay home and watch the baby not go out with all her friends.
2)the pain is somthin that you cant imagine
3) ask her wat she would do if her baby is mental
4)tell her having a baby costss alot of money
5)tell her not to be selfish and think of her FAMILY! what would she do if she had a daughter who is going to get pregnant!
6)her whole body is going to feel sick she is going to go threw hell!
7) and show her a tape of birth and that it is very painful!
.. tell her before she is going to make a HUGE change in her life. thinkk about your health,, famillyy school when is there going to be time for herself to go out to dances partys.. she will never hav that even if she gets a babysitter... it will still not be the same...
well i hope she makes the right choice.. keep being a good friend and make sure she does not get herself pregnant at 15... talk to her if she does not listen, you must go to her parents...........
GOOd Luck!
2007-03-29 11:06:05 · answer #8 · answered by nora456a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes 15 is way too young to have a baby. Your friend is just starting to live her life. She does not need to be tied down to a baby and it would be very hard for her to continue her education which she needs, find employment to make money to care for the baby or be able to fully take care of it. It not only would be unfair to herself but unfair to any baby that she would bring into the world.
2007-03-26 12:59:42 · answer #9 · answered by susie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a 15 year old daughter- and she is far too young to have a child- and she knows it also- she is just beginning her high school days. But whatever you tell her, she still may do what she wants anyway- however if she does get pregnant her mother and father may not want her to have this child- so make sure that she carries that child to term- You are right she is far too young. She should be thinking about her education and what she wants to do with her life
2007-03-26 13:01:00 · answer #10 · answered by AdoreHim 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋