My soon to be ex and I are currently going through the divorce process. She says she still wants to be friends, but, I'm not so sure it can happen. Have any divorced couples ever had a lasting friendly relationship?
2007-03-26 12:37:02 · 14 answers · asked by fernando197 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes. This hasn't happened to me personally, but my close friend's mother, with whom i'm even closer friends with, has had a working friendly relationship with her ex (my friend's blood father) and they see each other regularly over holidays, etc. They have been divorced over 10 years now. He has also remarried. It takes a person with a very open mind (i don't mean promiscuous, like what "open minded" has come to mean). I mean a person who is willing to see things just for what they are - that it didn't work out, but it doesn't mean that the person is a bad person or a person you can't be friends with.
2007-03-26 12:44:45 · answer #1 · answered by yukidomari 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If there are you have to keep it friendly for their sake and continue to maintain a good relationship with them by not talking negative about your ex- remember it is their other parent. But, to actually be friends in the same catagory as you would place other friends, I don't think so. There was a reason for the split and and like it or not alliances are formed on both sides of the family which makes it difficult to be friends. Also friends are supposed to talk and share things and confide in one another, ex's can't really do that because it may well be damaging to future relationships. Friendy yes, friends no. Just my opinion from experience.
2007-03-26 19:55:55 · answer #2 · answered by schlepp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES! I have known more than one.
You have to let go of the pain.
Just remember the good things that you liked about each other and remember to treat each other with respect.
Dear Abby had a WONDERFUL article written by a daughter of divorced parents who went on vacations together with their families. The newly formed couple even joined in the celebration of the other newly formed couples anniversary.
The girl's father even paid for the ex-wife and new spouse to go on a vacation with them.
You just have to decide to be friends and not worry about keeping score or who is right or wrong. Remember it is best for the kids to not have to constantly remember that their family is broken. Kids NEVER want to listen to anything negative about their parents, so NEVER say anything negative about the other one. That is one great and easy way to keep things relaxed and not be at each other's throats.
Getting along is a choice. Not getting along is a choice. Make the best choice.
2007-03-26 19:49:17 · answer #3 · answered by concerned 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex-husband and I are very good friends. We have kids, so we need to deal with each other on a regular basis, and it's never unpleasant. We have both moved on with other people, and the four of us actually get along great.
My ex and I split friendly, we had just grown apart, we didn't hate each other. I was still active duty military and he wanted a more stable home for our kids. I agreed that was probably best, but my job put the food ont he table. He deserved to be happy and so did I. The marriage ended, but our friendship did not - we both are glad to see each other happier now!
2007-03-26 19:59:15 · answer #4 · answered by SB76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you have kids i would really give it a try! my parents who were divorced when i was 14 and my sister 12 did not start out as friends but over time(about 3 years) they have become very good friends both have remarried and my step parents all get along with my parents also we have gone on family trips done birthday party's for the grand kids and grandparents and me and my sister! we go on a yearly family trip to Disneyland all of us go stay the weekend in a hotel together and everything! my little sister who is from my moms second marriage refers to my parents(dad and wife) as aunt and uncle and they treat her like a niece get her gifts on holidays and other things etc. when my mom had a stoke my dad and step mom rushed right there to be at her side and help care for her! we all just went to my moms and spent a 4 day weekend for her birthday my mom calls and just chats with my step mom and all this after we are all grown up i am 32 and my sister is 30 so it can work if people want it to!
2007-03-26 19:47:50 · answer #5 · answered by peterpansdate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes! It can be done. I have been friends with my ex for over 10 years. It takes alot of good sense and understanding. We don't cross the line. Today I am also friends with his girlfriend of 5 years. I love her and think she is the best thing that ever happened to him. It takes time and healing and you must not still have in love feelings for it to work.
2007-03-26 19:51:57 · answer #6 · answered by Debbie A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, lots of couple split amicably. I have several friends who are divorced and are still friends with the ex. Mostly for the kids but they are still decent to one another.
2007-03-26 19:43:31 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, my ex and I are friends. We don't talk often at all. But it can happen. Just make sure she's not using you as her back up guy in case her coming relationships don't work out.
2007-03-26 19:45:02 · answer #8 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my parents got divorced when I was 7 and growing up they were actually pretty good friends. It may have just been for my brother and I, but they actually do still talk sometimes and have a pretty amicable relationship.
2007-03-26 19:44:51 · answer #9 · answered by allie0311 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To me it seems to be a women thing any guy I know thats divorced never wants to see his ex again including me.
2007-03-26 19:53:32 · answer #10 · answered by miester44 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋