Is it wrong to only limit myself to Black men?

Question

I've only dated Black men so far. I love my brothers. But so many of them have gone scare and it's hard to find a strong Black man who can handle a strong Sista like me. I would feel like a trader to my brothers if I dated someone outside my race. My mom said that I should be a equal opportunity dater.But I think Hispanic guys are cute. What do you think about this?

Answer 1

I don't think there's a problem with it at all. If that's who you like then that's who you like. You aren't being racist for not dating other guys, that would be silly. Do what you want! : )

Answer 2

I would have to say that you have to do whatever YOU are comfortable with. You know you are limiting yourself as you stated so in the question posed. I like how you said you have only dated black men so far. That means that you are open to other options to me. I don't know that I would look for validation here though because of the ignorant answers that will be posted.

I agree with your mother. My mother actually told me that if I do not like to be discriminated against how could I discriminate when it came to dating. she told me this long before I was even old enough to date in one of those "Hey Ma, what would you do if...." questions.

I am currently inter-racially married, although my first husband was a black man. I too love my brothers but I love myself too. I have had both black men and women ask me about being married to a white man and I am sure that there are some that despise it and talk about me. they simply do not matter to be and have no bearing on my happiness. Don't feel like a trader, look around you will see black men with women of other races too. It's okay but not always easy you just have to rise above it.

When my current husband who is white initially approached me I wan't so sure about him. Not because he is white because I'd dated other white men and men of several other races and backgrounds. Well I finally gave in and went out with him and that was 11 years ago.

I have never been treated better. Not because he is of another race but because we are compatible. We understand each other and when we don't we talk about it until there is a mutual understanding. Not that there aren't times that we have to agree to disagree.

I too am a strong sista, and I know that took some getting used to for him. I just cant go along with something that I am not on board with and in his first marraige his wife did whatever he wanted withhout question, including planning menus. With me, it was like "look, that is what I cooked. If you are hungry you will eat it or find something else. Now his ex-wife would have cooked him a whole seperate meal.

There were a couple of times in the begining that we'd debate a subject and at the end we held onto our initial opinions and he would be infuriated that he could not change my way of thinking. But aside from loving and honoring me, he RESPECTS me.

I don't know where you are from but in Jersey and Philly you see blacks and hispanics together all the time and it is a non-issue. Maybe it is just not so common where you are.

Any relationship worth being in requires both people to give 100%. If you don't put anything into it, you'll get nothing out of it and that has nothing to do with race.

Answer 3

Well I only limit myself to Black men. Its nothing against other races, its just my preference. I find other races attractive but I keep it at that. I'm getting older and eventually I would like to get married and have children, BLACK children. That's why I only date Black men.

I don't think there is anything wrong with just dating black men as long as you don't do it because you have something against other races. If that's your preference, then that's your preference. Just like some men's preference is tall, with light skin and long hair, its nothing against the other people, its just what they like. Don't ever feel like you shouldn't date outside your race, you can if you so choose. Its just to you and who your heart chooses to love.

Answer 4

no because indian people from india do it too like the sikhs if they can do it you can too

saying black men is vague there are hispanics that are black i take it you have a stereotype that hispanic are a racial group and there are none whom are not indeed black

when you say hispanics are cute you are basically saying whites are cute, blacks are cute native americans are cute asians are cute because they are not a single race but a group comprised of many races and racial mixes

Answer 5

As an educated, professional black man, I am insulted with even the thought of black women dating outside of the race. Black men have enough problems with white men (and men of other races) outside the family, why should you now force your father and/or brothers to have to share holiday meals with them too? Black women kill me with this new fad crap. Stay with your own men! Stop this mixing thing!

Oh, my wife is Filipino so I'm not available. lol

Answer 6

I had this same argument with my mother...that she will only date black men...the bad thing is is that she is mixed!
As for me, I never listened to that nonsense, date who ever you find attractive no matter what race/color. Heck some black men date outside of their race all the time. Yes, Hispanic guys are hot but I have a thing for those Pacific Island boys...man they are sexy! But I'm married :-) and he is mixed too (he understands my thing for pacific islanders)!

Oh, another thing is that don't limit yourself because you might be passing up on a good thing!!!

Answer 7

We are all human beings. You shouldn't restrict yourself to a certain race. Love is love. While some people don't see it that way, it is truly Christ-like.
Men are men no matter what their exterior looks like...you even said that your 'preference' is getting scarce. Here is your perfect opportunity to get out of your comfort zone and see what else is out there! ;-)

Answer 8

I would say go for it...even though personally I'm on the other end of the spectrum, I've dated outside my race and religion but to be honest I will only marry and have children with a girl who was Irish catholic...so what Im sayin is, don't worry we all got our little quirks

Answer 9

I'm seeing you all over the place, and I think you are too worried about what others around you think. If you are attracted to other races and they are good dudes, date 'em. I personally don't think a mixed ethnicity marriage would be as easy as a single ethnicity one. Society is and always will be judgemental of those that are different, and I think mulatto kids suffer the most scrutiny.

Answer 10

no! It's not wrong at all! If you like Hispanic or white men though, try dating them too! but if your mom forbids you, do what your momma says. I dk i am probably not helping. I think asian boys are cute! although i wouldn't consider marrying them. Maybe dating though...

Answer 11

In my opinion, you shouldn't limit yourself just because you think you HAVE to date a black man.

You should, however, limit yourself to whom you find attractive, physically and mentally.

And no, you aren't going to hell because you think Hispanic guys are cute.

Think outside the box.