My husband Is the type of guy that jokes around alot you never know when he is serious. He was on the phone with his friend ( a guy) and he said something like wait for me before you get into the shower (Like he wanted to join him) I gave him a look and then he said to this friend said like my wife just looked at me or something like that. I just wondering if he could be gay I am confused now and I'm not sure if I should ask him if he was serious. IS THIS SOMETHING MOST guys joke around with their guy friends about? OR COULD HE BE GAY? The guy he talked to doesnt have a girlfriend but I know he was married once and has a son.
2007-03-26 11:24:07 · 44 answers · asked by oneredhotmama09 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know a lot of guys who joke around ... but I also know a lot of guys who get some " extra " action on the side from other men ... if you're worried why not approach the subject with him and have a serious conversation .... seems like it's bothering you ... the only stupid question - is the one NOT asked ... sounds cheesy & cliche but it's so true ... good luck ... !
2007-03-26 11:33:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if guys say this anymore but my first boyfriend many years ago used to say 'Blow Me' to his friends and they would say it to him. They - all of them - were extremely heterosexual and so was he (very loving and a good boyfriend and my first...)
I asked him one time why they said that and why, when he got a post card from someone who was on spring break, they would write that on the bottom of the card. He said it was just a phrase they said to each other - and I just took that to be the truth and didn't think about it again.
He cheated on me - with a girl - and after we broke up, he had a long relationship with a girl and probably married her but he still wrote me a love letter when he was missing me one night! He was romantic and sweet and loved sex. We were pretty young. If this is the only thing that has ever bothered you, I would tell your husband that it worries you because you were shocked. But I'd believe him if everything else in the marriage is fine.
The guy he was talking to - you say he was married once. It's hard to keep rumors that someone's gay from circulating. Imagine that this guy did tell your husband that he is feeling homosexual tendencies now, years after his marriage. If he told your husband this in confidence, would your husband drop him as a friend? If they were good friends, I hope not. And your husband could say things like that to kid him - and not to mean that he really would ever get in the shower with him! That's another scenario for that phone call.
2007-04-01 17:33:35 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE ISN'T GAY. I joke with my brother in law like that all of the time. I have never wanted to have sex with him. It is just a funny thing we do. I am secure with my sexuality and don't have issues with gay people. I think if either of us thought the other was serious we would stop the jokes immediately. It isn't a big deal or an indicator. Now if he is trolling city park restrooms late at night then you need to check in to it.
2007-03-31 20:34:29 · answer #3 · answered by c505ber 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, you never know. He could be in the closet already, he could be thinking about it, or he could be just joking about it. I would probably go with, he´s just joking about it. I am married, totally faithful to my wife, and sometimes I joke about it with friends. Kind of like how somebody slaps your butt when you´re playing baseball, and NOTHING MORE. Depends on some other factors, if he is like me, just joking he probably won´t be dressing a certain way, talk and walk a certain way,...etc..trust me, if you have any suspicions about him being gay, just observe his behavior for one week. You will know after that week, whether he´s gay or not. Good luck, I hope he is just joking about it.
2007-03-26 11:42:36 · answer #4 · answered by nassim420 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he did marry you.
He sounds a bit immature. It is very common that the more reaction a person gets from a statement the more they will continue with the joke or teasing.
Thus....you react and it feeds his teasing fire.
Try this, don't react to the gay jokes. Don't pay attention to him in any way shape or form. When he isn't getting your attention from the joke he will either find something else to joke about or he will joke with someone else.
If you are concerned about the gay thing....there needs to be more evidence than him joking about it.
2007-03-26 11:38:50 · answer #5 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, my husband is the most man guy I know, and very rarely he jokes with his friends in a sort of "gay" way, but not usually to that extreme. Ex: Sometimes my husband may say something to me like, Did you grab my butt? while we are in a group of people, and I will be like, No why would I want to grab YOUR butt? or something like that (even though I had) and one of his friends might say something like "I would grab your butt". Usually this is completely harmless, good natured ribbing, and unless you have other clues, I would not base gay on one phone conversation. Either there are other clues, or you have not been married long at all, not to know enough about him to know for sure...
2007-03-26 11:42:16 · answer #6 · answered by It's Just My Opinion 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. That is not something heterosexual men talk or joke about. You should sit your husband down, and talk quietly about whether he is gay or bisexual. Hopefully, he'll open up and be honest with you. If he starts crying, he's gay. If he gets a little mad and tells you're crazy, let it go. But keep tabs on him. Don't mention what you heard on the phone, 'cause if he's lying to you, he'll just make something up.
2007-04-03 07:11:31 · answer #7 · answered by LadyLynn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i will say this: in a marriage there should be open communication and no secrets. NONE! if there is anything i need to talk to my wife about, you better believe i'm going to ask...regardless of whether or not she may feel i'm out of line. how else can you maintain any type of trust? if you don't talk to him about it, you will begin to have this suspicion in your heart about him. now some guys might, but, i do not joke that way with any of my friends. you should be able to tell him that you don't appreciate him joking like that with anyone, and if he gets mad or whatever, it's ok. there are no rules that say every moment of your marriage will be happy ones. if he truly loves you, then he will get over it.
2007-03-26 11:37:50 · answer #8 · answered by Bk2Az 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a guy, and I'd NEVER joke around like that over the phone. In person, I would reserve a comment like that for a group, and I would have to use a very feminine voice, wave my wrists in a stereotypical fashion, and mince around. The parody would be obvious to all as I'm built like a fullback.
If that is the way he always talks to his guy friends, and they talk that way to him, I don't know (does he call you a guy's name when you make love)? Maybe he's bi?
2007-03-26 11:36:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He cud be gay.. i know for a fact that women do not go around joking like that which means its taboo for a man to joke like that with another guy.. besides study says that out of every joke there is some percentage of truth.. I would let it slide for now and keep my eye on him.
2007-03-26 11:35:42 · answer #10 · answered by tamrastic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋