My wife of 5 years has exhausted me with her self centered and petty childishnes. If she doesn't have her way, she throws fits akin to a 5 year old. She has in the past: harrassed me at work with never ending barrages of phone calls, physically hit me with her fists and various objects, verbally abused me (and my friends and family, but never when they are around), taken personal items like car keys or thrown out my family photographs, the list is endless. She lost her mom at a young age, and I think this is the result; a jealous, insecure, and angry adult. We will probably divorce, but you may think I'm nuts, I love her. Yet I have tried to help her, but as the saying goes, you lead a horse to water but,..
Anyhow, I thought everything I have done in this marriage fell into line as trying to be a "good husband". But really none of my efforts have yielded results and the situation seems like it will only improve if one of us leaves (me, she won't) or dies! Feedback appreciated...
2007-03-26 10:34:49 · 18 answers · asked by doubledown924 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was married to a whacko and thought that if I was good enough she would change. It doesn't happen that way. Been divorced for 2 years now and she still is a whacko. She hit me, cussed out my family (to the point they wouldn't visit), lied about my fidelity, went to bed when my friends came over, refused to go to my family christmas parties.
I hate to say this man, I would give her the ultimatum of "shape up or ship out" and give her maybe a month to make some positive steps. Your own sanity is probably at stake if you are like I was. My blood pressure actually went back to normal 1 week ater I left and I lost 25 pounds. THere are lots of women out there who want a normal guy that tries to be a good person.
2007-03-26 11:28:23 · answer #1 · answered by stratplayer1967 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bud, your marraige sounds just like a buddy of mines. His wife was pycho. I mean seriously, she is unstable. He has tried to convince her to go get therapy. She wouldn't have anything to do with it. Infact she filed for divorce under the grounds that he was trying to kill her. This guy has been a close friend for 25 years and I know there is no way he could ever even hurt anyone. The funny thing is that he has told me that he still loves her and just wants to help her. He would go back in a second. I keep telling him to let it go and find a stable woman that will make you happy. This chick is a lost cause. She doesnt want any help. Dude, I would say get away. It is going to hurt, but the only way to get better is for you to let her go.
Sorry, and good luck.
2007-03-26 10:54:59 · answer #2 · answered by ragbagz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are an abused husband, both physically and mentally and probably emotionally as well. It sounds as if your spouse needs a good therapist and probably some anger management classes. As you said, you can take to these things but you cannot force her to use them. You may have to leave her in order for her to wake up and realize you are serious about the way you feel, maybe then she will agree to go to therapy and get the help she so obviously needs.
2007-03-26 10:42:26 · answer #3 · answered by Kevin J 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That 's life,there are only two kind of people that lives in this earth, one victimizer and a victim.When a person tried to abuse you, nip it on the bud. You do not deserve to be treated badly,by anyone,you are a special human being. If I were you I would leave her and start new a experience with a woman who will respect me as a person and a man..Good Luck. I wish you love and happiness..
2007-03-26 11:37:55 · answer #4 · answered by Vannili 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My baby's father was once additionally bodily and emotional abused, horribly, in his bio and foster houses. He has a few disorders for the reason that of it however he under no circumstances even come practically hitting and even spanking his baby and it's for the reason that he was once so abused and he under no circumstances wishes to be just like the persons that harm him. Hopefully your man would be the equal. However, I might watch his interplay along with his baby to start with simply to be riskless for the reason that whilst persons develop up in an atmosphere like that they're much more likely to abuse than any person who grew up in a loving house. That is why they name it the cycle of abuse.
2016-09-05 16:56:27 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out now! I have been down that road and am still in it. I am the wife of a very self centered very large cranky husband. The only way I can get out of it is to wait for him to go to jail so if you have a way out take it. She needs serious help NOW!
2007-03-26 10:40:10 · answer #6 · answered by brog 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds like it to me! I'm sure there are a lot of guys where you sit, but won't admit it. Get out of this as quickly as possible. Your wife needs some help and staying with her like this, ain't helping you or her.
2007-03-26 10:44:43 · answer #7 · answered by the anomaly23 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she needs counselling - and possibly anger management
if you love her - you may want to stay around and go with her to the therapy sessions for support
she may change afterwards, if not - I would consider leaving you can only take so much verbal and physical and mental abuse from anyone
2007-03-26 10:44:25 · answer #8 · answered by boonoora 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you need to get professional help here. She sounds like she has anger issues and maybe a chemical imbalance. Perhaps medication will help. Tell her that if she doesn't get help you will have to leave. You can't live a normal life with someone like that around.
2007-03-26 10:41:01 · answer #9 · answered by hummingbird 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I worked in a prison and this guy was abused badly. Things went to far one night and she died. He spent time in prison. It is not worth it. You both need help but, i would get out before it got out of hand.
Good luck
2007-03-26 16:34:33 · answer #10 · answered by shyone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋