What should I do?

Question

My Fiance just told me some revealing things.

Within the ages of 11-14 he had several encounters with his 5 year younger sister. It wasnt intercourse per se, but just "touchy-feeley" He said he tried to slip it in but didnt knowhow or where!! They matured and it never happened again. I am worried that his sister will tell and get him thrown in prison and all that stuff. If that normal behavior? I wouldnt know because I was an only child.
Im thinking about going to talk to his sister about it and make sure there isnt animoscity.

PS They are pretty close, I dont think that there is hatred but who knows?

How should he work it out with his sister?

Answer 1

That is not normal! You are old enough at that age to know what you are doing and that it is not okay to do that. I would be worried of what he would do if you had kids together, dont go to his sister about it. That is something between them and if it was me I would not stay with your fiance.

Answer 2

No boys of that age should be left alone with young children. The strength of their sexual inquisitiveness can be overpowering. If he was 11-14, she was not age 5 thru the whole episode. Don't talk to his sister about it. She has apparently forgiven him or forgotten. It would do her harm to remind her. I can't believe that your only concern is whether she will report him to the law. How do you feel personally about his behavior? Can you forget it? I suggest you both get some counseling.

Answer 3

You should encourage HIM to talk to his sister about it, she may be hurting inside all this time and him just acknowledging it happened will help.

Hiding this under a rug for the next 20 years will just make it worse.

Also there could be a history of this with others, he may need some professional help. It could have been a one time thing or it could be a sign of something more.