I love my husband, but when we got married he was the first person/only person I ever had sex with. I have only ever been with him, but he's been with 14 other women (that I know of) before me. ONE year after we got married and we had a son, and halfway through that first year he lost interest completely in having sex. I don't know why, and he claims that he needs viagra or something, but I've seen him just roll over on a perfectly "good one".... He's totally uninterested in sex, he's only 7 years older than me, I'm 22, and I am pretty, and not fat or anything. He makes me feel ugly and worthless, why won't he make love to me? We used to have sex, we weren't bad at it, but now he doesn't want it anymore? He is the only sex I've ever known, but once every three months at MOST is not enough for me! I've tried confronting him and asking him and telling him it's not enough and he denies it goes more than 3 months without sex, and doesn't understand. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-26 08:54:57 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's cheating on you. plain and simple.
it s hard to realize, i know, because my ex-wife cheated on me more then once , and even though there s no doubt about it, she will still deny it, even with her hands painted red.
i m 25, she was 13 years older then i, and she also was the first one that i ever had sex with. but after we got married, it was like you, the sex stopped , and the interest stopped. yet her interest in others grew.
So , i left her. and here i am, still recovering.
sorry to say, but your man is cheating on you.
If there is no interest in sex from the spouse, then there is cheating going on.
I suggest, you leave him. Marriage is only marriage IF the person loves you, and in order to love, a person MUST love sex with there partner.
if not, that is TOTALL proof of them cheating.
2007-03-27 08:43:56 · answer #1 · answered by Aaron M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh god.. do I know how you feel. Atleast its only 3 months that you two go.. I would have to go sooooo long without it. I asked everyone the same question and didn't get any help out of it.
I ended up leaving him recently because I just felt like we have no more connections, I was tryin and he wasn't. That's after 7 years of being with eachother with a 5 year old.
There just comes a time when two people lose interest in eachother and if they're not willing to work through it then whats the point? You don't wanna be stuck in a relationship where its only going one way. The both of you have to work at the relationship to make it work.
Ugh.. I can go on and on about how unhappy I am with AND without him. But whats the point in being with a person if you're still unhappy with them?
2007-03-26 16:06:27 · answer #2 · answered by Destinee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't believe you start documenting how often you have sex. If its something he wants to address then address it with him. If he doesn't want to work at it you may be out of luck. See how he likes divorce instead. You are correct in your belief that once every three months isn't enough. I would be out on the freeway with a high powered rifle picking off motorists if I went three months without.
2007-03-26 16:03:06 · answer #3 · answered by Devdude 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can try coming on to him. He might be thinking the same thing about you. Try sexy outfits and talking sexy too him. Having a baby changes a lot of things he may look at you differently since your the mother of his child and no longer as sexual partner, Tell him that you missed the way he loved you and the things he did to you and how they make you felt. You gotta spice things up try working it out before going to get divorced.
2007-03-26 16:10:11 · answer #4 · answered by BBW 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him how you feel, let him know that you would like to be patient with him & supportative of him to seek medical advice for any problems he has. if he is not interested in seeking medical advice know where you stand & let him know. sex is a very important part of intimacy in a relationship.
why do you feel ugly & worthless? has he told you that? communication is the biggest thing you two need
2007-03-26 16:06:56 · answer #5 · answered by ms_debbieg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes in a marraige its easy to fall into that rut. i know for me sometimes i feel so close to my wife its almost likes she's a blood relative. Maybe because your the mother of his child now he sees you a littlbe bit differently. maybe he respects you soo much he cant see you as the dirty little sex puppet you once were. you should try dressin up, or porn. porn does somethin for guys that there wifes cant do. then you get to reap all the benifits!
2007-03-26 16:06:52 · answer #6 · answered by racer88crx 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to seek a counselor. Making love is a very important part of a marriage. It shows how much you care for each other. Best of luck to you.
2007-03-26 16:05:44 · answer #7 · answered by christ d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are caught in a libido mismatch. I am very sorry for you, as I too am in the same awful situation.
There is a support group of people that understand what you are going through. SWAGE
2007-03-26 16:07:14 · answer #8 · answered by JRSK007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey my guess is he is having sex with someone else. Most guys at that age dont go that long with out sex..so either he is having sex with another woman or another man. Prepare yourself!!
2007-03-26 16:07:22 · answer #9 · answered by jbe2176 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
umm, if hes denying its more than 3 months, then maybe he isnt doing with out. Seek counseling, but if he doesnt want to work it out, then maybe you should move on you are too young to live a loveless life.
2007-03-26 16:03:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋