EEEEEW! Didn't anyone find this very very creepy?

Question

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20070322/lf_afp/afplifestyleussexchastity_070322082138

Sadly I think this will just really mess girls up for life in so many different way. I won't even be surprise if chance of them having adultery go through the roof.

Answer 1

"The father makes a pledge that he is going to keep his mind pure and be faithful to her mother and there is also a time when there is a conversation about putting the right kinds of things in your mind, such as the father not using pornography,"

so up until then the church fathers use pornography and sleep around??? I would have thought that no mention of this was needed because isnt that what the rest of us see as honoring a marriage?

I think it is abuse in itself to brainwash your child into wanting this ceremony, when the fact is that adults are continually thinking that their children have the thoughts they have. people who cheat accuse everyone of it, thieves believe others are stealing...
so the parents have been unfaithful, and have guilt over it, and try to take it out on their kids by forcing them to do these ceremonies like a proxy vote for chastity. once again, the ugly head of religion shows it is anything but pure.

Answer 2

As one blogger has said:

I'm sorry, but every time I read "Purity Balls," I give a little Beavis and Butthead chuckle.

Unfortunately, things like this only heighten girl's interest and obsession with sexuality. When combined with mythological nonsense as a substitute for sex education, stunted autonomy, and the immature concept that "everyone should have a big happy Christian family", they will be primed for early pregnancy.

When I was in high school, we used to go for the private school religious girls because they were so licensous.

Once these girls male classmates it puberty, the hounds of hell will be on their heels.

It's sad, really, because I'm sure the parents would like better for their children. Instead, they turn sexuality into this big main attraction and surround it with pageantry and mysticism.

I'm astounded at this article. Ten-year-old girls shouldn't even be thinking about sex yet. If anything, they should be getting sex education, seeing all the nasty STD photos, etc. at that age.

Thanks for posting this! Check this out, it's even more bizarre, she's kissing her dad:

http://www.abcs-tucson.org/purityball2ndannual.htm

haha.

Answer 3

I think if you talk to your children and give them the proper information about sex and birth control and let them choose they'll normally choose not to do it.

Personally I'd rather know my children are having sex than be out in the blue and have a child having a child. If my daughter wants to have sex- fine but she better be on the pill, have a job and car and her own place.

Making someone promise not to do something until they're "allowed" to is pathetic. Raise your kids properly and if they have sex- they do. get over it. they're teenagers and sex seems to be all they know.

I'm 20 and I can honestly say I was a virgin until I was:
an adult
on birth control
in a very long term relationship
out on my own
and had money/stability to support a child.

I however am not a parent yet and I'm waiting but if it happens I'll be the best mother possible.

Answer 4

I'm thinking this is something I don't buy into. I agree with the last statement in the article. What happens when these little girls do have sex. I betcha they are a lot less likely to go to mommy and daddy for help after their parents spent a ton of money on some purity ball.
I think the vow should be more focused on being between the girl and God. What about boys? Shouldn't they be taught purity.
There are so many levels that I think this is a bad idea.
Its kind of weird, I think. Pledging your purity to your dad instead of God is part of it. Also whats up with the dad pledging marital issues to his daughter? what is that about.

I'm with you on this one. I think their intentions may have been in the right place but ewwwww.

Answer 5

Creepy in that special way that only Christians can be creepy. Daddy is a LITTLE too interested in his daughters sex life. At 9, does the girl really even understand what she's doing?

Now when she goes out at 12 and has sex, daddy can be extra indignant, in the way that only Christians can be indignant.

Remember, these are the people who want to control the country and the government! Pretty soon, we'll all have to perform this creepy ritual!!!!
Yuck.

Answer 6

I think this is getting a bit scarey yes. But there probably is a group of people who think that this will bring back the old values of getting married before sex and also at the same time give the parents a piece of mind where their children are concerned. It could be a way for parents to worry less about their children becoming HIV positive too. So who is wrong? Its difficult to say, I say go with your own heart and values and don't make out like sex is the biggest sin in the world becuase its only human to feel like you want to so people should quit overrating it our young are getting confused. Take care Heather

Answer 7

That is pretty messed up.

What works against attempts like this is that you make sex in to a much bigger deal than it actually is, and it becomes all bound up with other things in the kids mind.

I can pretty much guarantee you that at least half the kids having Purity Balls will be pregnant when they're 17.

Whereas my evil, liberal, chill parents have just said, "Respect yourself and use a condom," and I know I'm waiting. I'm not sure what for, but I'm waiting.

Answer 8

I think it goes a tad bit overboard (and dangerously Freudian) in that the entire act is intimating an actual wedding between daddy and his little girl. Do you really need the limosine, tuxedo, long white gown, ceremony complete with VOWS, and the exchange of rings. What's the girl to say later in life to the man she hopes will marry her....I give thee this ring that my father gave to me at our Purity Ball where we exchanged our vows to one another that we will both remain pure and chaste....me unsexually until I am to marry the man of my dreams....and he unpornagraphically forever to my mother. What's the deal with that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I understand the innocent intention and the fact that they want these beliefs and lifestyles to be special and rewarding....BUT C'MON NOW.

That being said, I totally agree with the idea of abstinance education for our youth (and that includes both girls and boys). It's a very important topic that's been around since the beginning of time. And I would love to participate in a more constructive way of incorporating these values and beliefs in my child's world.

What if a single women parent of a daughter wanted to have a Purity Ball the exact same way it's explained in the article.

If Purity Balls are going to be the wave of the next sex education future, they need not to be so gender biased (father - daughter / mother - son). Although, I've not heard of a mother-son Purity Ball.

But, more importantly, what child REALLY wants to be married to their parents. Oh wait, what parent REALLY wants to be married to their child.

I'm just not feeling this AT ALL.

Answer 9

That is way too young an age to have a child take that type of "vow". I think you're right that they will have more problems on their hands in the long run. This is obviously efforts by parents who don't trust what values they are trying to instill in their children. Talk about doubting your own parenting skills.

Answer 10

When I was a kid, the ones who did the scariest, weirdest, riskiest things were the ones who came from ultra strict xtian families. I agree with you - its weird and creepy. And as the article pointed out, 88% break the vow within the a few years of taking it.