i have a friend who...?

Question

has liked me for a long time, and i know it. he tells like evryone. and i have really never liked him anymore than i friend. a really good friend. well, lately he has been acting like he is going to comit suicide. like he keeps saying how great death will be and everything. plus, he keeps saying to people the thing about how i dont like him. so i talked to my mom about it and she told me just to tell him i like him back, just so he wont do it. but now he thinks i like him and i dont at all. not even in a million years. when i go to the same school as him next year, i just know that if this is still going on he will freak out when i get a boyfriend. and it will hurt him even more. how am i supposed to tell him i dont like him but not hurt him so bad that he kills himself?

sorry its so long, i didn't think i would type that much.

i don't think you guys are understanding completely. my mom didn't do anything wrong. she told me to say that after he had sent me a message on myspace saying he liked me all dramatic and everything. and he would have known if i read it and didnt say anything back

Answer 1

oh my, this happened at school one time. Let me tell you the story:

Theres this girl that likes this guy since 4th gradee! can you believe it? well, anyways, that guy found out that not a lot of people like her so, out of pity, he said, "I like you, too" he didn't mean for it to be like, a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, but then she started telling the WHOLE school about THEM, and it spreaded like wildfire. It really hurt the guy since he didn't like her at all and doesn't want the whole school thinking they were a couple. One day, he came up to me (we have the same 4th period class) and I was teasing him saying, "Oh, how's your girlfriend?" That was then he just snapped in two. He said, or practically yelled, "SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND! I DON'T LIKE HER AT ALL!!!" I suggested to him that he should talk to her, and he did. The girl took it pretty nicely. So maybe you should tell him (gently) that you like him AS A FRIEND, and you don't want anything more. You can say that it might hurt him in the near future since you guys are really good friends. It might ruin the whole concept of you two being friends. It will really affect your friendship. Anywaysssss, I wonder, why does he tell the whole school? I mean, crushes are kept on the down-low, you know? Oh, wait. He might really want attention. And since you are a really good friend of his, he's taking advantage of that and wanting to get attention from you and only you. Pay mroe attention to him and he might not commit suicide...oh well, i hope this helps. <333333

Answer 2

First of all your mom I hate to say it gave you VERY BAD advice. You need to be honest at all costs and know that if he's thinking about dying it has nothing to do with you personally at all. He was thinking about it before you told him you liked him and may very well say it after you are honest. There is more to his suicide threats than the simple fact you may or may not like him. The best thing you can do is be a friend and when you see signs that he is serious report it to his mom or dad or another adult. Maybe even your mom but in this case i would go to her only if there was no one else. Maybe your mom just doesn't know how to handle this herself and solving it by saying you like him when you do not seems easy, but in the end it will be more detrimental to him if you keep lying to him about it. Hope this helps.

Answer 3

Most people who actually commit suicide don't tell people about it ahead of time. It sounds to me like this guy is trying to get attention in any way he can. I have a friend who is the same way, and was recently "Baker Acted" for threatening suicide. When he makes remarks like that to me, I feel like he is just plain trying to be manipulative, because most of the times he has done it is when I am in a relationship. He wants me to "be there" for him, just in case I guess. On the other hand, the guy could have major depression, and need psychiatric help. Either way, you don't need to get messed up in a relationship like that. Be honest with him and tell him you don't want anything more than a friendship with him, and be very careful after that. People who use manipulative tactics to try and gain love can turn out dangerous. (Personal experience!)

Answer 4

First thing first you are not responsible for him!!! he may say he will kill himself but that is NOT YOUR FAULT!! Your friend has some serious mental issues that need to be addressed and I suggest you talk him into seeking the help of a counselor, I went through a similar situation with my step father when I was 18 and moving out on my own.... If you feel guilt for not being a "good enough friend" you should not own that.... the best thing you can do for him is get him help!!!! Even if that means you have to pretend to like him in order for himm to get that help!!!

Answer 5

immediate tell him you don't like him. Not face to face. He is CRAZY! He might flip out kill you then himself. Send him a message on my-space saying that you don't like him and never want to see him again. That's it. nothing else. Not cruel, Not dramatic, no reason or reasoning. Empty and straight to the point. Don't respond, change your number, and hopefully you have home security. If you have to see him at school make sure its a crowd of people around. He will try to talk to you make it short talk like "I'm busy" "I have to go" I'm in a hurry, get back to you when i can'. Never cacth eye contact. Phyco people have this ability to read everything with a persons eyes.

Answer 6

You aren't responsible for his actions. If he tried to throw that off onto you (committing suicide) then he isn't a very good friend. You can't make yourself feel what you simply don't feel. Don't blame yourself. Your mom is wrong. You shouldn't say something you aren't sincere about, no matter what the outcome may be. That'll just make the situation worse. Perhaps he needs therapy and should seek professional help.

Answer 7

Well the way i see it you have 2 choices
1) you tell him up front that you don't like him
2) you let him think that for a while at least and than just act like you got over him
both maybe cruel but cruel is the only way to go about it

sorry to say it

Answer 8

Go to his parents and tell them that there is an issue, If you dont want to do that then write an anonymous letter to them telling them there is a problem with him and that he needs counseling, If his parents are not supportive tell a teacher what he is saying, Suicide is no joke and shame on your mother for not taking this seriously... guess she doesnt know the teen suicide rate. Dont let this rest on your shoulders.... get adults involved.

Answer 9

Karen and that i've got been ultimate acquaintances for 36 years (i'm 40-one now). We have been in conventional college jointly, senior college, even in an identical domicile in college. We have been the two in the recorder group and the orchestra. We have been the two student librarians and lost touch for a on an identical time as while we left college. She left 2 years previously me. on the 1st day at a clean church, Karen replaced into there. in basic terms traveling, then I joined her W.I. and we've stayed in widely used touch ever on the grounds that. She's married and lives in peterborough now yet she is composed of stay with me each and every now and then and we digital mail one yet another in many cases.

Answer 10

there's no right or wrong answer. i think the best approach for you is to tell him how you really feel, that you like him only as far as a friend. you just have to be honest with your feelings. and if he start acting like he is going to commit suicide, just tell him you are not comfortable with it. the point is try to make him forget about you. usually when you ignore him, he will just go away.