In the last place we lived, my husband was a city cop. There is this girl who works at one of the local gas stations on midnights, when my husband workws, who called him pumpkin all the time and burned a CD for him and flirts with all the other officers. She has nicknames for them as well. One night, I went home with our daughter and saw the front door standing open. I started to drive up to the PD to find him and saw his car (as well as other squads) at the gas station. No big deal. I parked outside. When I pulled up, the officers were walking out. I saw this girl parked ina truck staring at the officers talking (she was with someone). When we pulled away, my husband told me to go ahead, he'd be there in a minute. I said, "i'm not going home without you". He pulled in next to the truck to talk to her. When I told him I wouldn't leave, he acted like he was going to show her our daughter. Whatever he was going to talk to her about, he didn't when we realized I was staying.
2007-03-26 03:49:38 · 12 answers · asked by Lady in Red 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Anyway, having several police officer friends, I know a lot of them cheat. So, I was suspicious. It wasn't until after that incident I found that CD she made for him (hard metal, nothing romantic or anything). I told him she was nothing but a cop groupie and she just wanted to sleep with an officer. Turns out I was right, she is now with one of them who is recenlty divorced. Why did he not go ahead and carry on his conversation with her when I said I would stay? Why on earth would he stop to talk to some skank when I found the front door of the house standing open when I came home? It's been quiet some time ago, but I still have a horrible gut-feeling about it. We have talked about it several times. He says nothing happened and he wasn't interested in her or attracted to her. He says he only talked to her when he purchased coffee in that place, but then why would he go out of his way to talk to her like that? That's the one thing that doesn't add up? Anyone agree withe me?
2007-03-26 03:55:36 · update #1
I don't think your husband had anything to do with her. Men just like us women, like to have their egos stroked every once in a while. He and the other officers probably got flattered with the flirting and attention she gave them. I do feel though that it is a good thing you caught on to the attention she was giving your husband and the other officers. As long as you are aware of her intentions, this will at least let your husband know you are not naive and he will need to think twice before her innocent flirting ever starts to get inappropriate. Some silly women have this thing for a man in a uniform. Best of luck to you!
2007-03-26 04:08:23 · answer #1 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While I don't wish to characterize, in general, I agree with you. If it looks like a pig, walks like a pig and oinks like a pig, well.... This is the male cop ego seeking attention and validation. A lot of men seek to know that they could score, even if they don't actually go through with it. Cops are of a fraternity, which carries a lot of peer pressure with a private, macho code...like they somehow are different and carry a special power, yet they need to somehow prove to their buddies that they deserve to be included. Not necessarily the highest of intelligence, they can be prone to such emotional pressures. If you are married to a pig, then what you've experienced may just go with the territory and therefore, not wrong for being suspicious.
2007-03-26 11:31:06 · answer #2 · answered by seattlego 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Badgebunnies....they'll do it every time. Insofar as your question I couldn't really say. It is unusal behavoir and he may have been laying the groundwork for something else however again this is speculation only on my part.
He also may have been telling her "Hey...keep it cool because that's the wife over there' but whatever he said it must have been important enough to keep you waiting for a short time.
I'd suggest letting it lie. You have good reason to be suspicious considering the woman has a reputation for having brass button fever. But now its just a matter of you keeping an eye on him and see what if anything transpires. I wouldn't let it eat me alive if I were you.
2007-03-26 11:16:15 · answer #3 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know exactly what your husband was doing. A man who isn't interested in anyone else would have introduced his wife and his daughter to the other woman. This wasn't the first suspicion you had about your husband and I'm sure it won't be the last. I know many cops and none of them are faithful to their wives. Not one. This doesn't mean that all married cops cheat, it just means that all the ones' I know, do. I wish you the best of luck and may GOD bless.
2007-03-26 11:05:40 · answer #4 · answered by cookie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds very suspisous..but also remember that he is a cop and maybe it was something to do with that..If you have other reasons to think that he may be or may have cheated on you and think that they are legit reasons maybe you should take it all into consideration and figure out what you should do from there...try talking to him about it..his reaction will say it all..If he gets mad that you are asking him and flips out then you know that he has done something..but iof he insist that he didnt do anything and has nothing to hide and generaly looks hurt he may be telling the truth...you know him well, you are married to him..so if you decided to talk to him about it just look at the reactions he gives you and decide what they mean..best of luck
2007-03-26 10:57:45 · answer #5 · answered by Mel 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think he was up to anything . Ive become friends with girls like that they are just overly friendly and kind of nice to talk to a woman like one of the guys at the local hang out spot. 10 to 1 your husband probably thought it best just to go rather then have a seen that was already stirring being that you wouldn't go.
2007-03-26 11:49:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can understand that you are furious and holds deep hate with your husband. its not your fault, your husband into a bad circumstances he is tempted to be in. you need to help him out. marriage is a commitment, ask this question to yourself, what is your goal? will it be fixen your trust with him? save the relationship? or let go? i suggest you calm down and write every detailed questions that pops at your mind and talk to your husband in a calm tone so he would answer you back, and when he does, try to listen, so for him to feel, that you are his family. try to tell him that he hurts you, he has to tell you sorry and have to make up for it; and for you to calm down, he needs to answer your questions with honestly to regain your trust. its a very agonizing situation for a wife to forget things like this, you might end up exchanging hurtful words everyday, you might both regret later. don't let this girl ruin your marriage. you need to forgive him, for you to move on. understand that he is just human. Keeping hate in silence is not healthy for both of you and your relationship.
2007-03-26 11:41:23 · answer #7 · answered by JV 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him so help you God if you find out he banged this other woman he can kiss this marriage goodbye and you're going to have some nicknames for him and trust you, he is not going to like any of them. Any questions?
2007-03-26 11:04:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
All you can do is keep watching your hubby, your marriage and see what develops. You can certainly come out and tell your hubby what you saw and how it made you feel. If he acts defensive, just tell him "I figured you would want to know how I feel, but my feelings don't matter, that says something, too." see how he reacts...most men want to protect their wives and make sure they feel good about the relationship. Take care.
2007-03-26 10:56:29 · answer #9 · answered by Paul 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Only losers work at gas stations! LOL!
2007-03-26 10:56:45 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋