How do I get my 15y old son to do better in school?

Question

My 15y old son has been failing school all year long. I have tried grounding him, no money, no computer time unless for school work, no T.V.,ect. He feels he cannot do the work. He does have an unidentifed learning problem. He can listen to a topic being discussed in class then he can orally answer questions, but when he has to read something he can't or wont. I am at a loss as to what I need to do. Help Please!

Answer 1

There are many different ways our minds take in information. One is auditorily. It sounds like your son doesn't have any problems processing information auditorily, but visually. This can be caused by poor focus or an inability to capture a "picture" of the words. One thing you could do the next time he's reading something is look at his eyes. Do they move smoothly across the page? If not it could be the neurological functions in his brain that aren't strengthened enough. Or it could be that he's unable to focus on each word long enough.

Answer 2

Clearly, he has problems with literature or reading class. Read him bedtime stores (not the kiddie ones, older ones). If he sees how fun it can be, maybe he'll get interested. The Hardy Boys books are very good to start on. When is comfortable with those, then let him read a page, then you read a page. Take turns. Gradually let him read more and more and finally, he'll be reading to you, or himself. If you test him on the materials he reads, it'll help also. Just so as long as you give him a treat if he does good on those tests.
P.S. Make sure you teach him how to read to himself quietly, too.

Answer 3

Try giving your son something called Focus. It's a pill suppose to help with ever day problems like that. I have also tried The eye Q program, its great.

Answer 4

Check for autism. Normally, autistic people excell in one thing while they do awful in everything else. I know a lot of people that have autism (it runs in the family) and I know the signs. Plus, Albert Einstein had autism. Maybe your son is the same. I'm not saying he does have autism, but he might show the signs.

Answer 5

Make him an offer he can't refuse like buy him a car or pay for his driving lesson.

Answer 6

It sounds like he's discouraged and thinks he can't do well in school because of his learning problem, so he's given up. I'm in college now, but I have an anxiety disorder that makes it hard for me when I take tests. Last semester, I failed many of my classes because I got so frustrated that I stopped trying. But this semester, I have professors that suit my learning style better and I have more self confidence, and I'm making all A's and B's. I also have accomodations that help me during certain situations (like extra time during tests).

So it sounds like he's an auditory learner, and that he has some sort of reading disability. But that doesn't mean he can't succeed in school and life! Be sure he knows that, because having any kind of learning problem can be so discouraging--even though I'm a National Merit Scholar and in my college's honors program, I still felt stupid because of my test anxiety disorder. Sooo many people have problems with reading--my grandfather almost never learned to read, but now he's a professor and writes books! Make sure your son knows that he's smart--that his reading problem does NOT mean he's dumb or will be stuck in some low-paying job. A big part of it is mindset. You have to believe you can do well before you can!

Another very important thing would be to work with his teacher. This doesn't mean putting him in a special ed program--no need for that-- but it's common, even in college, for students with learning problems to get accomodations, like extra time on tests, or even someone to help him read test questions. Also, consider getting him a trained tutor--someone from Sylvan learning center, for example--who is especially familiar with his learning problem. They can help him improve his reading skills as well as help him learn how to use his strengths to compensate for his weaknesses. For example, it sounds like he's an auditory learner. So it might help him to bring a tape recorder to class (many college students do this for the same reason) and record his teachers' lectures. That way he can listen back to them later when he's doing homework. It might help him to read aloud to himself rather than silently, or to record himself reading out loud. He will probably need to get tested by a professional to determine his specific learning problem--that will help him get the tutoring and accomodations he needs.

Most important: be supportive, and give him lots of praise, even for the little things like finishing his homework. He'll need to build his self-confidence. I'd stop the punishment, because it sounds like that's not working, and at this point it will probably only discourage him further. If this were a behavioral problem, then that would be the road to go, but it sounds like it's a learning problem (and just being downright frustrated with himself). So focus on helping him pinpoint what's holding him back, and let him know that you believe in him. That will mean a lot. And let him know about people with learning disorders who have succeeded--maybe there's people in your family, or friends--or heck, ask on yahoo answers! Like I said, I have one, but I'm going pre-med and doing great academically. Tell him that I can relate to what he's dealing with, but to not let it hold him back--just because you fail one semester, or even one school year, doesn't mean that you can't go as far as you want to academically! I know it's hard to ask for help (I was so embarrassed at first when I had to tell my professors about my disorder), but teachers and people like that are happy to help you succeed, and they've dealt with stuff like this before. They'll be happy to see him taking initiative to do his best! Good luck! :)

Answer 7

Keep giving him consequences for not doing what he's supposed to do, but reward him when he does good.