I am married, have a 2 year old girl, love her very much, but the wife & i are at the terms of ending it all!?

Question

What do i do, seriously? I dont want to lose my daughter, nor do my wife want to lose her. She is the reason we are together, but we fight every time we talk and or we dont talk at all.

Answer 1

Maybe you can try marriage counseling. It may work if you both are willing to work at the marriage. You can also try to talk to you church pastor. They may have a support group that you can join.

Answer 2

Stop. You hit the issue right on the head. You and your wife need to learn how to communicate. I truly believe many marriages could have been saved if the parties learned how to have a positive exchange. A discussion is not something one has to win. A discussion is a session geared toward solution. Finding the best solution to an issue requires both parties to express their points of view and then marry them into resolution. No point of view is right or wrong. Express thoughts and find common ground. Working from here rather than from "I am right and you are wrong" contest gets to the answer much quicker and leaves time to enjoy life. So stop, sit down, identify what the issues are and take each one to resolution. Within this framework each party must be willing to give some. Once you both agree on the best approach, then carry it out. No excuses. This builds trust in the process. Each time it gets easier and easier. You will look back and wonder what all the fuss was about.

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Answer 3

Staying together for the child will do more harm then good for your daughter.

However, if your relationship can be fixed at all, you need to try counciling and every other motion that you can.

If not, you need to end your relationship on a respectful GOOD level with your wife, and discuss what you guys should do about child custody.

If your the main bread bringer, then offer to pay childsupport, but tell her you would like shared custody, 50/50. And then let her say what she wants. Any maybe you can compermise to a place where your both happy with the outcome.

However, it is imparitive that you end your relationship on good terms, rather then a huge fight and someone walking out. That will be much worse for your daughter.

Answer 4

I'm going through a similar situation, however, my daughter is older and she KNOWS who I am, alhamdullah. If you are going to go with divorce, see about joint custody. Try to be as amicable as possible because the real ugly truth is that in America, the woman will be the first choice for custody. Of course, lawyers can fight it out, but it's important that the child's wlefare is considered, as you know. Counselling should be sought to try to work out the marriage before the final decision.

Best wishes.

Answer 5

It's not the end of the world nor everything. Continue to seek compromise and cooperation with your wife. Ultimately, remember that your breakdown in marriage should have little or no implication for your daughter. She shouldn't be a victim of your actions. Good luck with everything.

Answer 6

Hi brother ,
look at your lil innocent girl's eyes .. is this the future that you wanna give her ? "deserted child" "unloved at a teeny meeny age" "result of parental discord" ....

relationships are very difficult but it is for you and your wife to understand this new person 's adjustment to your family making it a 3some since now there s a 3rd person involved ...

dont leave her with one parent at such a tender age .. try and work out your discord with your wife ... maybe only for your daughter's sake cus u say you love her .. and love is unconditional.. we can do anything for the one we love rite ? ...
cmon be a good sport , take ur relationship as a challenge and be victorious , dont loose so soon ...

I dont know what country you re in but patience and fidelity and tolerance is what we re taught in india ..

plus let me also suggest to you a fengshui trick , get a fengshui amethyst tree which is nothin too expensive and place it in the south-west corner of your bedroom ..
yes do it with a compass and figure the south west direction out place a stool and keep the tree on that
it will bring the husband wife bond closer ...
plus gift your wife a rose quartz bracelet and get yourself one too so it will make u both tolerant and in love of each other ...
and if possible instead of having a double bed in th room fer sleeping try n get one single bed but of larger dimensions .... meaning the bed should not have division in th centre as in a double bed .. this will erase any rifts between you both ... get such a single large bed ordered .. this works very well ...
trust me .. i did that to my mom dad and they are happy ever after , they used to fight a lot ok

do this buddy and do not think of a divorce okay ? ... take care and feel free to get in touch with me for any remedies at my email/ messenger and im a healer so i will try make this all better for you ...
and trust me your lil one is an angel dont loose her she will make her father proud ok
bbye take care

Answer 7

50-50 on everything. if you live in the same vicinity this shouldn't be a problem. and no matter what, do not fight in front of your daughter or talk bad about your spouse in front of her. you both need to make sure the child knows this isn't her fault and you both love her equally so she can still see you both equally.

Answer 8

It's not healthy for a two year old to be around all that fighting. Try a trial separation, and see how it goes. Good luck to you.

Answer 9

Counselling, maybe...but staying together for the kid is often worse than divorce especially if your marriage is that bad. Then I suppose you could do a joint custody thing.

Answer 10

start with the root of the problem what brought it now, was it the dirty socks on the floor, undone dishes, etc??
both have to talk and communicate to resolve the problems.
Marriage if work!!