Can gay males, be happily married to woman?

Question

I'm a 27yo, gay male, that's agreed to have an arranged marriage with a woman, who I don't even know. A lot depends on this, as I'm also a Muslim and Fijian Indian. i thought that I'd be able to go through withthis, but as it's getting closer, I'm getting freaked. Sexually, prefprmance has never been a problem, but emtional I connect better with guys. This has all come about, after I saw brokeback mountain, which I was refusing to watch, but I won't want my life to end up being a lie and it's not fair on the girl, as it's not her fault at all, But I can't help the way I feel.

Answer 1

I wouldn't do it.

Answer 2

I know that it is unfair to the girl to be married to a gay, much more to the fact that you have not told her nor your family perhaps about it. Your performance in bed doesn't really matter but your performance as a husband and a father someday would count. It is also a known fact that it is offensive to your tradition and religion to publicly admit that you are gay. So, the best way forward is to talk to your parents first about your problem and seek for some advice. It will be a difficult time but it's better to confront your problem now than create another bigger problem later on.

Answer 3

You'll end up hurting her..Better to tell her now and see if she wants to go through with the arranged marriage under those circumstances..You will put tremendous straing on yourself later if you don't do something now. SHe has every right to know what she is committing the rest of her life to. Maybe she will be comfortable with the relationship--maybe she's a lesbian..who knows?

Answer 4

In certain societies it is quite prevalent for gay men to get married to women, purely to keep their sexuality under cover. Marriage acts as social security, and they give in to it for various reasons - fear of being rejected as a homosexual, ridicule, alienation from family, and so on. It is difficult for them to come to terms with their self-expression and what the society expects out of them. Hence, one way to resolve this for yourself will be to make a choice - to be true to your feelings, or deny yourself the freedom you were born with. Think what it will mean to the woman who will marry you, were she to somehow find your 'hidden' sexuality. Will it not shatter her life forever? She might try to come to terms with it, but will that be fair on anyone - you and her, and the two families involved?
On the other hand, if you decide not to go ahead with it, today it will be very difficult for you to convince others about you... but if you are strong enough, and have the confidence to lead a life YOU want, you will be able to overcome all hassles, slowly but surely. Have faith in yourself, and decide what would you prefer. A decision taken by the heart is more rewarding than those taken keeping a certain compromise in mind. By getting married, you are not only compromising your own free will, but also compromising the well deserved love your wife might otherwise receive from a straight husband.
If this means you have to go against your people, be prepared. Ultimately, those who truly love you will stand by you. And be ready to let go of those who only wanted to see you as they wanted you to be, not as you wanted yourself to be. It is not worth living a life for such people.

Answer 5

You can love a woman and be one half of a strong partnership, but you must not deny that there will always have periods of your life when your thoughts are on gay sex.

This may cause you to consider clandestine behaviour behind your wifes back, which is unacceptable. So perhaps, you should not marry a woman.

Answer 6

if you feel that way then dont marry this woman that you are talking about.

Answer 7

Don't do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look how unhappy Heath and Jake were...