I have trouble saying NO to some of friend's requests. How can I be rid
of this trouble?
2007-03-24 21:05:22 · 8 answers · asked by Bahman 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
It depends on what you're saying no to! For instance if a friend asks to borrow money that you don't want to give or can't afford it, you could say, "I would love you help you out, believe me, but I'm short on money." You can turn down requests without actually saying the word, "No." And people prefer not to hear the word no, by the way. That's why it doesn't want to roll off your tongue! Just use tact and good manners. The friends that get insulted by your refusal of their requests are not worth having as a friend anyway.
2007-03-24 21:22:03 · answer #1 · answered by Gayle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Realize that no one can go on indefinitely giving more than they have or are willing to give. It will make you ego weak and twisted. Start by asking yourself, "Is this something I feel comfortable doing?" If it isn't, don't treat it like its something major. Glance at them and say, "Thank you for playing but, No I'm not going with that." If they press harder, you tell them, "Find somebody else. I don't want to offend you but, READ MY LIPS.... NO!" In time you will become more practiced at setting your limits. In time, many of the people around you will come to accept that you set limits. Those who don't will either go away or get familiar with the terms, "Injunction, Restraining Order, and Stalker."
2007-03-24 21:23:31 · answer #2 · answered by Olde Spy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is important in your maturity to learn to say no when you want to or you will become a doormat that people just walk over.
Make a conscious decision that each time someone asks you something you learn to say....let me think about that.
Then think about it. And really you don't owe anyone explainations. You are not obligated to be and do what other people want you to do.
You can get a confidence that you are NOT defined by pleasing other people. That doesn't mean that you need to be offensive, you just need to learn to say no.
It is a lesson I needed to learn. And life is much better when I am honest and make my yes mean yes and my no mean no and not worry about it.
2007-03-24 21:37:22 · answer #3 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them that you would like to help, but it's just too much for you at this time. Although, you aren't sharing what the requests are, so maybe you shouldn't say no, eh?
2007-03-24 21:15:51 · answer #4 · answered by theblackenedphoenix 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way to get over your fear is to not worry so much about gaining others approval. It is not your job to make everybody happy, nor is it required.
You'll be fine..and so will they.
2007-03-24 21:32:32 · answer #5 · answered by Rain 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them your not a YES MAN and explain briefly why its NO this time. Don't show regret for your decision.
2007-03-24 21:20:21 · answer #6 · answered by GoldE 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Their being 'let down' is purely a reaction of theirs, not yours or something you control.
2007-03-24 21:53:10 · answer #7 · answered by annoyed_with_the_other_answers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont set yourself up to be in those situations if noting else tell him it will be no next time and stand firm by that
2007-03-24 21:33:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋