What are your comments on this man’s quixotic plan and on my assessment of its futility? Read Details.?

Question

I was in a day long event to meet Holocaust survivors, a former Skinhead, and an Equal Rights activist. The Equal Rights activist’s speech was full with solutions to world’s equality problems. He ranted that if you yourself respected everyone and you told “just one other person” to do the same, this would give the world Dr. Martin Luther King dreamt of. Right after the event was over, I went to ask him how does he expect his plan to work if every person in the world has a different concept of what respect is and of what one’s own requirements are for a person to be deserving of his respect? And told him that every person experiences life differently, and gives meaning and value to everything in life according to those experiences. He answered that this was the point of his speech, and that that’s why by telling only one other person to be respectful of everybody we might change the world. Well, he obviously did not understand my question, and I had to leave without clarifying it.

In your opinion, is equality possible or just a dream?

In response to mar1188, tolerance and respect are not the same thing. Respect involves giving it value, tolerance involves ignoring it. The "egalitarian" did not use the word tolerance but respect he did use excesively.

When saying do unto others what you'd like others to do unto you, you have to realize that what those "others" would like others do on themselves is not the same for everyone, but in fact it is completely different for all of us. What each of us expect of respecting others is to be respected in the same way, there are gargatuan quantities of ways to be respected and disrespected. Making it impossible to make the world equal. Every person has a different idea of who is deserving of their respect, showing that the quest for equality is useless and that the concept of respect is not universal. Also, the reasons why a person decides another person worthy of his respect are can be anything (money, sports skills, singing talent, artistic talent, and many more), supporting to a further extent that respect is not universal.

Answer 1

I think you're actually right on this one. Just saying to 'respect' or even 'tolerate' other people and their ideas is WAY to vague to have any meaning. Take a very simple case in point:

I personally am accustomed to hanging around with authors and philosophers. Both these groups are people are used to criticism... to some extent if you DON'T criticize what they're doing it suggests that you are completely disengaged with it. They both usually want to have a tight work, to know how other people have recieved it, and many other things that you can only really get by getting input from other people.

And perhaps it goes without saying, but most people are NOT like this. Most people see a barrage of questions as resistance, not interest. I've had more than one encounter with someone who was actually completely insulted because I respected them and their ideas enough to say how I reacted to them.

This is just a small example. Respect in some nations involves not pointing your feet at other people. Respect in some involves burping loudly after meals. And among some groups, respect can even involve physical altercations and so on. In other words, respect is FAR from universal, and is arguably far more cultural than anything else.

This is (as you observe) EXACTLY why 'do unto others as you would have them do unto you' doesn't work. Let's face it: what some people want are things that you and I would think are completely sick.

A far better rule is 'learn about others enough to reasonably do unto them as they would have you do unto them'. But that doesn't quite roll off the tongue so well, does it?

Answer 2

I don't think that his plan is futile (maybe a bit naive & impossible)...I think that respect is universal. I don't think it's a different concept for everyone. Respect means treating someone the way that you would like to be treated yourself. Treating them as an equal, with human dignity. It doesn't matter how differently you experience life, you should know what respect is.

You can't change the whole world. People who are disrespectful, cruel & evil probably can't be converted, but the rest of the population who is basically good can certainly be inspired to stand up for what is right & show kindness to others. Maybe we can change the world one person at a time.

Answer 3

Hey Said,

Thank you for calling my attention to this question. Respect is not universal, since it is in the mind of the person giving the respect.

Tolerance is reserved for when you disagree with someone, but you respect that they have a right to their opinion.

So if respect is different for everyone, then there need to be guidelines that constrain the behavior of what is respectful. I have to say that I think it comes down to Good and Bad. There is good and bad in varying degrees in everyone. So, I believe that the 10 Commandments are the Law by which we need to frame respect, first. Then we need to extend within those constraints.

Common sense then comes into play. The topic is way to big for a simple answer, your question cuts deep into the concept of respect - but respect - the golden rule still stands in the face of your question. The person saying that 'tell just one person', that is questionable at best.

People go to Church, and when they leave the cut eachother off in the parking lot. Well, obviously they did not learn respect - at least as it was intended.

I hope (accentuate hope) that people understand that if you expect to be treated a certain way (in a positive good way), that you have to treat other people that way FIRST, and always. Even then, you will not get that returned 100%. But you have to set that example.

Will this spread 100% to the entire world and all people, one can hope, and one can try, but you cannot make people respect you they way you expect it. One, they don't understand, don't want to understand, and could care less in many cases. This is the ME generation, and it takes life altering situations to affect a ME generation thinker. If you always think the world bends to your needs, you will never get this concept.

Trust is given, first, and freely. When violated, it is given again (turn the other cheek). This establishes the foundation for the basis of respectful relationship to begin. If the response is violation of the trust again, a respectful relationship has failed. If the response on the other hand is one of trust, reciprocation and understanding (even tolerance), then a respectful relationship was established.

Again, this thought, RESPECT, is very complicated most especially to those that have no concept or understanding. So, I doubt that I could address your question sufficiently here. I do have the frame of a book started on this subject, but I only work on it occasionally.

I starred this question, so I can take your questions into account for future reference.

Answer 4

If I tell one other and he decides I'm an idiot and tells no one, the plan to change the world dies right there. Mathematically the problem is similar to uranium fission. For the chain reaction to occur, you need a sufficiently large (critical) mass, otherwise the reaction dies out. Similar idea in Jesus' parable about the good seed.

Philosophically, what does "respect" mean? The Latin roots mean "to see the thing." I can see a thing for what it is and not value it, I can even detest it. But my seeing will be conditioned by the framework of my own values (Wittgenstein). My conception of freedom may lead me to tolerate religious fundamentalists, but nothing will make me acknowledge their beliefs as having general value (other than their function as a philosophical life raft, in Buddha's sense). So I can hardly be expected to spread a message that actually means "share everyone else's values."

I think the best we can do is remain open to sharing ideas. If I listen to the fundamentalist and understand how his beliefs serve him, and if he listens to me in the same way (how likely?), each of us has a chance of feeling less alienated, less threatened by the other. But that kind of openness is difficult: it's lack is the moderator in the reactor's mix that damps out the reaction.

Answer 5

If we could tell someone to respect others and they would listen and there was some universal difinition of what respect was this might be possible. Sadly there is no way to do this.

A long time ago I thought that love was something that you reserved for some special set of people that you had judged worthy of it.

After a while I got to thinking about what Jesus had said about turning the other cheek and loving our neighbor I put the two together and realized that he had made no exceptions in these statements. It became obvious to me that he intended that we exclude no one from the love that we are supposed to be giving. I started thinking about my idea of love and suddenly realized that I had not been loving anyone at all. I had simply been judging everyone and every thing.

Judging someone worthy of love is not love, it is only judgment. I actually started to cry when I realized this. I saw just how much of my life I had wasted being judgmental, thinking of myself as a Christian, when I was actually doing just the opposite of what Jesus had asked us to do.

I thought about the verse judge not lest ye be judged, and I understood it for the first time.

I realized that I have a lot of catching up to do. So many opportunities were wasted. I now try to apply the love that I have for the world in a universal way like Jesus asks us to do.

If I start to feel afraid and think that I see someone that I should not love because of something I have thought or heard I try to catch my mistake as soon as possible. I tell myself that I have forgot the truth and have fallen for the same old trick that had cost me so many opportunities to be loving in the past. The horror of this realization is often all that is necessary to bring me back to my senses and make me drop the judgmental nonsense I was thinking.

I still have a lot to learn about love, but at least I’m making progress.

Love and blessings

Your brother
don

Answer 6

You made what he was trying to do more complicated then it had to be....... No matter what our individual experiences are, or ideas about equality are we all should know what it means to be nice to someone, ..... If we shared the simple idea, I want to be kind to you because you and I are human beings and asked you to pay that forward to another individual, I may be living a fantasy that I could somehow effect how people treat each other...... but you got caught up in the word "respect" instead of the idea he may have been trying to convey.. I smile at you and hope you smile at the next person. I extend a hand to shake your hand is a friendly gesture and hope you do the same...Do un to others as you would have them do un to you.

Answer 7

Okay, this is a very long question. Respecting others and their opinions means that one is open to others' beliefs and lifestyles. You may not agree with all beliefs and lifestyles, but instead of saying how stupid they are, balance out the pros and cons. So, if you tell someone this, to be open, and that person tells two more people, the message escalates until thousands are opened to tolerance. Perhaps, if more neo-Nazis, Klan members and every hate group listened to the message of message of tolerance, acceptance and respect, there'd be peace in the world.

Answer 8

"In your opinion, is equality possible or just a dream?"

You are right-- true, 100% equality would involve all of us being EXACTLY THE SAME, and since that is not the case, then there is no such thing as genuine equality.

Equality as a philosophical ideal is a good ideal to hold onto, of course-- one should always try to treat others with the same measure of respect.

There are many ideals which are not based in reality, but which it benefits the individual and society to practice, and equality is one of them.

I hope this was helpful!

Answer 9

We are all different. Equality is in that sens a beautiful dream. And this dream is possible if we receive and accept all differences. Take the others without expecting they change. The value is not in economy but in culture. We have to fight with the idea nobody can make nothing. We have to fight with this modern way, only one way to think. We have all a part of responsability. The revolution is in us, it has to pass by me !

Answer 10

You are right about tolerance. It includes negative emotion and therefore is useless for effecting positive change.
Not only was the speaker right, but we can go one step further. We don`t necessarily have to actually go to another person. All that is needed is to visualize or imagine telling that one person and really feel it, want it. That`s all.