My husband loves to look!?

Question

My husband loves looking at other women on the net. I even found out he tried to find one of his ex-girlfriends using a search engine. He claims they were only friends and kissed once. When we are in public, I see him looking at other women. What gives? I tried talking to him about it for years and nothing has changed. I don't want to imagin how he acts around his friends.

Thank you everyone for your opinions. Much appreciated!

Ok...I guess I didn't make this clear. He literally stares at other women. It's not just an innocent look which I think IS normal. Starring at other women while he is with you is not being respectful. It's not about being insecure. It's about being respected!

Answer 1

hi,
i used to have that same problem and it turned out i didn't really want to find out how he acted around his friend's. it was my worst nightmare ever. mainly when guys do is because they want you but they also want to keep their options open. guy's don't contacttheir ex's unless they want something or something is up way more than just friend's. my husband did that same thing for a while and it turned out that he cheated on me alot. so becarefull and watch out. ask him to go to couple theripist and seek a solution to the problem. u need to ask him why and give him a altimative.
you or other women tell him that he can't have both. give him only three chances afterwards if u catch him doing it say that's one and u got two more to go and we are done. it worked on mine. good luck sign baby gurl....

Answer 2

It is the nature of men to look. You should be able to tell him you don't like it, and would like him to not do it around you. Explain why, explain how it makes you feel. Be honest.

If he cheats on you, or has in the past then you probably aren't as upset about the looking as you are about the cheating.

When you talk to him about it you have to remember that he can't stop noticing attractive women. What you need from him is not for him to pluck his eyes out, just to show some restraint and decorum. It's not asking too much of him, you are simply asking him not let you see him doing it because how it makes you feel.

If he doesn't get it after having calm honest conversation consider therapy. You need to get to the bottom of why this makes you like it does, and why he doesn't get it. Hopefully you can do it as a couple and learn and grow closer together.

A lot of women hate it when their man notices a pretty woman because of feelings of insecurity and low self esteem, but not all woman. I don't know your situation so I can't say if that's you or not, but you should really look at yourself and try to figure why it bugs you so much before you talk to him about it again.

Answer 3

Its all about where the line is. For instance, you don't ever look at men right? Riiiigggghhhtttt! Its in our genes to look...both male and female. And I bet if we had him here right now, he would tell you that yes he has caught you looking plenty of times so don't for one minute think he is the only one looking or the only one seeing you look. So what am I saying here. He looks, you look but who makes love to you? that's what really counts isn't it? Now if you are asking this because you think there is much more going on, then we have another discussion, but I am not really getting that from your question, although I am not sure why he is looking for an old g/f on a search engine. But if you don't think anything is going on outside his marriage to you, then I would just chalk it up to him looking the same way you are looking. Whats funny, is I will admit, that women are much better disguising the way they look at a guy....they aren't nearly as obvious but make no mistake...married or unmarried...women do look. .....Good Luck!

Answer 4

Lol, i've got reported this comparable subject with my boyfriend. I actual can and have been fascinated in women people, and that i've got questioned in spite of if i became homosexual or no longer. yet i quite love men, and that i'm completely in love with my bf. i would not have it any incorrect way. maybe u men ought to discover ur fable, maybe if u try this it will kinda get out of ur device. i would not advise doing it without ur husband, because of the fact u recognize, this is termed cheating lol. i quite to maintain my fable purely that because of the fact, i'm afraid a threesome might smash my courting with my bf. If u men can handle that, then i say have exciting lol.

Answer 5

OK tell me you don't look at other men. There is nothing wrong with looking. If you are so insecure that you think that just looking is wrong then you have a problem. Grow up.

Answer 6

I agree with the all men looks thing....how bout this...

Next time you guys go out to a fancy restaurant go out the house lookin like a bum. Sweatpants and a T-Shirt. Lil make up not much..He'll pay attention to you alright

I think thats very cute and "sexy" i should say on a girl

But NO your husband expects you to wear something elegant like a dress...

Hun when you guys get home be sure not to give him any<--and you know what im talkin about.

You should spy on his lil sneaky azz...well just a thought

Lauren*

Answer 7

Men are going to look women do the same thing and it will never change!!

Answer 8

He is not being considerate if he plainly ogles whilst in your company.

The problem is that Pornography is dehumanizing women completely. He looks at them like meat, as he has been progammed to do by modern society.

Answer 9

That is just something you'll have to accept from a guy. It is just our normal reaction, and once you're married, i guess everything is revealed. Don't worry about, looking is not bad, but when it comes to touching, THEN its bad. :)

Answer 10

men look. women look. its how they look that can be offensive. if they start wanting to touch....you have a problem. wanting to touch is the same as cheating. they'd do it if they could get away with it. once they've done that, it just gets easier to cheat.